Hello?

Do you like scary movies?

No, I'm more of a romantic comedy type person

Why

There are certain rules

that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie

Rule #1: Have parents that care about you.

Mom, Dad, can I go to a party- uh I mean, spend the night at a friends house tonight?

Ha! Stupid child, you're not leaving this house.

There's a masked murderer on the loose.

You never let me do anything!

Rule #2: Don't date crazy a-holes.

Come on, Sid.

I know someone just tried to kill you and all

but why won't you do it with me?

Because, Billy.

I'm not a slut that just puts out all the time

So....

you're saying you're not like your mom?

What?!?

Nothing. Stabs, stubby stab.

Rule #3:

If you are being attacked inside a house that is filled

with people, who are your friends..

you should call out for their help.

AHhhhhhhh! Help me! I'm trapped in the garage with the killer!

Hey you! Get him man!! Ahh!

Help me! I'm trapped upstairs with the killer!

What? Let's get him!

Hey.. someone help me.. I'm trapped at school with the killer.

Aw man.. Ahhhhh!!

Rule #4:

If friends aren't available, do more than just run.

If you know the killer off his feet because he's wearing a ridiculous costume

with terrible visibility,

You have the upper hand.

Don't keep running away.

Take that sucker out!

Kick him in the throat! Do something!

The dude is going to kill you.

Rule #5:

Don't live where the police and investigative reporters are terrible at their jobs.

Let's never ever, ever, ever, ever break up.

ever, ever, ever, ever, ever.

Which brings me to rule #6:

911 and star 69.

I have a question

Yea, you in the hat..

What do you do if the killer attacks you inside your dreams?

Well that's something entirely different. If that happens you j-- OH NO!

Oh yes! Hahaha

Run everybody run! Forget the rules all you can do is run!

You're mine now!

Hahahahaha