(demonic music) HALO, IT'S ME! I'M BACK! HALO!

You've been waiting months for this.

Years even.

DECADES if your cold black heart is cold and black enough.

And then,

Out of the blue,

You hear that sweet, sweet bloop

(phone notification rings)

Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well.

Look how the tables,

Have turned.

(dramatic bang)

You know, they say revenge is a dish best served cold

And I assume this because when your first slighted,

You were probably eating a lot of ice cream.

(crying voice) One day,

Yer gonna come crawling back to me

Yooh see (you'll see)

I'm calling it right now!

Yngenna come (your gonna come),

Anysngena text me outta buu (and your gonna text me out of the blue)

Ann den (and then)

AH maneven (?)

Yu'll see! Okay? I told you so!

I told you so!

(choking noise) x2

(sniff)

Aye wubb (?)

I'm nice.

I had this guy who had been like a mega asshole to me

Reach out and say

Mega asshole: "Hey! let's get together!"

"I miss you!"

"It's been a while!"

And I just couldn't stop that smug sense of satisfaction

that over came my entire being

Because three years ago,

We were kinda dating each other,

Kinda seeing each other,

Made out a few times

And he was gonna move to a different state.

So I said:

Oh man,

You're moving?

Wanna go to lunch?

My treat.

It will be like our little going away party.

(text sent notification)

(text notification) Mega asshole: "Na. See you never."

Yup

"See you never"

HA!

HA, HA!

Well it's three years later bro

And guess who wants to see me now?

So you know what I said?

Dude, I don't care about you no more

I'm too good for you

Get outta here

(snicker)

Ignored

The "I told you so" in my heart was enough

But it just sucks when someone disses you that hard but then eventually comes back

It's like,

You don't even care anymore, right?

Like, you've had enough time to just completely move on

I just wished my past-self who was eating all that ice cream and crying

Could look into the future at this moment

and have her, her just like, her up most righteousness

But that's not the way that life works, right?

And look, not everyone who disses you or rejects you is eventually gonna come cawling back

But,

It's always a possibility

And I know I should say that you should be the bigger person

And everyone has their own journey

And you should try to understand that and learn to forgive and forget

But,

I'm not gonna say that

I'm gonna say,

Enjoy that sweet, sweet feeling that you won

Because you did

And I'm a pitying motherfucker.

I'm Anna Akana.

Stay Awesome Gotham.