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  • I'm at the Kukkiwon World Taekwondo headquarters

  • here in Seoul.

  • Today, I'm going to learn the great art of self defense

  • and I think given the hour that I have,

  • I should rise very high, maybe to the highest level.

  • (audience laughter)

  • They just told me that they wanna give a live demonstration

  • in my honor, that they've prepared.

  • This is the plastic chair of honor that I've been given.

  • We're I think 10 minutes into the production,

  • and nothing has happened.

  • I guess this is demonstrating that the best defense

  • is to not fight at all.

  • (dramatic, building music)

  • I think this is the Korean West Side Story.

  • (audience applause and laughter)

  • Okay, this guy is giving the Heimlich maneuver

  • to that gentleman right there.

  • Let's see what's happening, whoa!

  • If you're attacked by two men making love,

  • you just jump over them.

  • Whoa!

  • That's incredible.

  • Whoa!

  • (applause)

  • (dramatic music)

  • (audience laughter)

  • That's me in one hour.

  • I would like to learn Taekwondo, and I'd like to show

  • you my uniform.

  • (applause)

  • (speaks in foreign language)

  • Can I make sound effects?

  • (speaks in foreign language)

  • Is that okay, is that allowed?

  • Ha!

  • (shouting)

  • Okay, so how many do you want?

  • We'll start with one.

  • (shouts)

  • Answer the question.

  • How often have you been attacked with plywood?

  • (audience laughter)

  • (shouts)

  • (applause)

  • Was that helpful?

  • Broken, smashed, broken.

  • Two boards?

  • Can you do more?

  • Ha!

  • Two boards, two!

  • Wait, five?

  • What are you talking about, five?

  • What?

  • No!

  • They're making me jump from one to five.

  • Okay, I'm gonna do it.

  • (exhales)

  • (shouts)

  • (applause)

  • Yeah!

  • Ah!

  • Jesus!

  • Master Song, there is a person I work with

  • who irritates me.

  • (audience laughter)

  • This has a TDS of, let's say, 400.

  • This has a TDS, probably, reverse osmosis.

  • You know what?

  • I find you TDS.

  • (audience laughter)

  • I would like you and your students...

  • I dont know what, how do you say, "Kick the shit out of..."

  • To attack?

  • How about I pretend to attack you with this,

  • and you defend?

  • I do nothing important.

  • I waste your time.

  • Oh yeah!

  • (applause)

I'm at the Kukkiwon World Taekwondo headquarters

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B1 中級 美國腔

柯南成了跆拳道大師。 (Conan Becomes A Tae Kwon Do Master)

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    gl880809 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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