GATHER ROUND. WELCOME, GENTLEMEN.

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL AND BLESSED DAY FOR AN AUCTION.

ALL RIGHT, Y'ALL, GET ON UP THERE.

- PUT THAT WHIP DOWN AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS, THOUGH.

- STRAIGHT UP.

I DON'T CARE WHAT PLANTATION I END UP ON.

I'M STRAIGHT STAGING A REVOLT IN THIS MOTHER[bleep].

- HELLS YEAH.

- WE HAVE LOT A, LOT B, AND LOT C.

- UH, $3 ON LOT A. - $4.

- 5!

- $5 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD.

LOT A GOES TO THE MAN IN THE BLACK HAT.

- I MEAN, GOOD. - YEAH.

- [chuckles] I'M GLAD I DIDN'T GET SOLD,

'CAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE OWNED BY ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.

- WHOEVER BUYS ME, THEY BETTER KILL ME THE FIRST DAY,

OR I'MA GO BUCK-WILD ON THE WHOLE OPERATION.

- OKAAY?

- NEXT ONE, GET UP ON UP THERE, NOW.

- OH, THIS--OKAY.

both: [inhale]

- $6 ON LOT A.

- $7! - EIGHT.

- 9!

- $9 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD!

both: [exhale]

- OKAY, WELL, YOU HAVE TO BUY THAT DUDE.

- IT'S A NO-BRAINER. - I MEAN, THAT GUY'S HUGE.

- A MASSIVE INDIVIDUAL.

- THAT'S TWO OF ME. - ANYBODY WOULD BUY HIM.

- I'D BUY THAT DUDE.

- MY QUESTION IS HOW'D THEY CATCH HIM?

- NEXT!

- OKAY. OH, YEAH. - YEAH.

- $2 ON LOT A.

- $2 GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD.

- SEE, NOW, THAT SURPRISES ME.

- THAT IS INTERESTING, TO SAY THE LEAST.

- I MEAN, WELL, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE AT A CERTAIN POINT,

IT'S LIKE, DO THEY EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY'RE LOOKING FOR?

- IT'S LIKE THE WHOLE CRITERIA

SEEMS JUST A LITTLE INCONSISTENT.

- I MEAN, AT SOME POINT, I WANT TO BE ON LOT A.

- YEAH, WHICH-- CAN A BROTHA GET ON LOT A?

- NEXT.

- OH, HERE WE GO. - HERE WE GO.

- BEEN A PLEASURE. - GIVE 'EM HELL.

- ALL RIGHT. - OKAY.

- $8 ON LOT A.

- GOING ONCE, TWICE, THREE TIMES, SOLD!

- HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN? - NOPE, NOT TRUE.

- HOW DOES IT HAPPEN?

- WHAT YOU JUST SAID-- THAT'S GOBBLEDYGOOK.

OKAY? THAT CAN'T BE TRUE. 'CAUSE WHAT CAN THIS DUDE DO?

LOOK AT HIM. WHAT COULD HE PICK?

A COTTON PLANT IS, LIKE, THIS TALL.

- YES. - I'M SAY--

NO OFFENSE, BROTHA, I'M JUST SAYING.

- OFFENSE TAKEN. - WHA--[gasps]

AM I WRONG? IS HE NOT SHORT? HE'S SHORT.

BUT YOU ARE ACTUALLY SHORT IN REAL LIFE, IN THE WORLD.

- YOU'RE GOOD, MAN. - ENOUGH.

I WILL NOT HAVE MY REPUTATION TAINTED,

SELLIN' SUPERFICIAL, BIGOTED SLAVES.

- SUPERFICIAL? DID THAT REALLY JUST COME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH?

- THAT'S IT! THIS AUCTION'S OVER!

- AUCTION'S OVER? - WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

NO, IT'S--IT AIN'T OVER. IT'S NOT OVER!

I'M STRONG, Y'ALL!

I'M VERY STR-- I CAN SLEEP IN A BUCKET.

- I'M FAST, I GOT STAMINA, AND I KNOW MAGIC.

- MY WORST QUALITY IS THAT I'M A PERFECTIONIST.

- LET ME MEN-- HAVE I MENTIONED THIS? DOCILE.

I AM AGREEABLE TO A FAULT.

YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE DUDE WHO ASKED ME TO GET ON THE BOAT

WHEN WE CAME OVER HERE.

- NOT A VIOLENT BONE IN MY BODY.

- I JUST WALKED RIGHT ON, NO BIG DEAL.

NEVER SEEN A BOAT IN MY LIFE.