was my bronzer stick.

Like a pen, you would click, click, click, click, click it

until it would just ejaculate some sparkly, browned bronzer.

And then you'd be like, "Great, it's ready to go."

(doo-wop music)

- So today we're taking a jaunt down memory lane,

and we're going to try makeup tips from the early 2000s.

- What are we talking about here?

- This was a time when I bought a lot of these magazines

and was like, "I do not look like any of these people."

- We have got some juicy Seventeen magazines from 2001.

I think there's one in here from like 2006.

- I wasn't allowed to wear face makeup in middle school,

but I was allowed to wear lip balms,

which sort of expanded to include lip glosses as well.

- Mine was lychee scented.

It cost way too much money.

- All the sticky makeup on your face.

Am I cute?

Ask me to prom.

Except I had to ask people to prom.

- I was really, really into colored eyeliner.

I would do like a green eyeliner

and then like a blue eyeshadow, and then I was like, "Yep!"

- All of your style tips came from these bad boys.

- Eyeshadow without eyeliner was huge.

- What a time to be alive.

- They were definitely simpler times.

- So obviously these magazines have great advice,

so let's see what they say about makeup looks.

(school bell ringing)

- I'm gonna use the common sense that I had when I was

15 and 16, which is just, "Don't know where to put it?

"Put it all over!"

- These eyes were something that I would totally have done.

You would see some crazy eyeshadow like this,

so let's try and do something like that.

- So I'm gonna try to copy this look.

You wanted to become like a very reflective surface,

in case you went out running at night

and you wanted cars to be able to see you.

- There weren't any Beauty Blenders back then.

All we had was what God gave us.

- Okay, it says first swipe base on areas

that are prone to redness.

Then blend in the product with clean fingers.

No makeup brushes.

That's chill.

- It seems like she just has pink just...

All over her lid.

Remember the days when you could just put one color

on your lid and that was it?

- Liquid eyeshadow.

Yeah, I said it.

Liquid eyeshadow.

That was a thing.

(deep breath)

This is gonna be it.

We're doing it.

We're doing it live, people.

- Uh, I don't know how she did the matte cheek look

because that is not the outcome here.

- The picture literally just has her eye,

and it has the brush right here.

- It's my understanding that you have to smudge your eyes.

Instead of blending, you smudge.

That was a big term back then.

- When the girls were doing their makeup in the bathroom,

I was writing Harry Potter fanfiction.

- Okay, I'm gonna put that shimmery shadow--

I mean, it kind of migrated up there anyway.

Yeah, this feels right.

I remember this.

And we're off to the races.

That almost looks like too good.

Is there glitter?

- I still use my bareMinerals bronzer

that I used in high school.

It's not, of course, the same pot.

I'm not that disgusting.

- I feel like if I would've walked out the door with this,

my mom would've been like...

- "Remember, less is more, so start with

"a small amount of blush, and layer it on

"to intensify the shade."

- This feels very accurate to my early 2000 experience.

Ready?

I would suck in my cheeks.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Now I remember why we don't use liquid eyeshadow anymore.

It cakes.

It's caking.

It looks like I have dry skin,

like it's just flaked off my face.

- I mean, I imagine people 10 years from now

will look at magazines and Pinterest

and be like, "Oh, these girls were crazy.

"Their eyes looked way overlined."

- I feel like I started off like homecoming,

and now I'm going back to like seventh grade dance.

- I feel a sudden urge to write every boy

I kissed in high school a letter of apology.

La, la, la, la, la.

And then they'd come back, and they'd just have like...

Gunk.

- I am very glad that I am not my early-2000s self anymore

because that person was somehow

even less cool than this person.

- Though this is not something that I would do nowadays,

I do remember this fondly.

Because it's part of your formative years,

when you just make weird decisions

about what to put on your face.

And, you know, and then it makes you

the woman who you are today.

- A lot of the techniques I still use.

A lot of the products I don't use.

- This is a good reminder that it's good to be older.

- Deep inside all of us,

there is a girl who looks like this,

and she needs to be celebrated.

- Feels good to not be shackled

under the weight of glitter any longer.

- But I'm ready to go see Spiderman with my friends,

and that's all that counts.

- That was so hot,

when he was upside down and they made out.

That was really hot, okay.

That's all I'm gonna say about that movie.

(swishing)

(sign creaking)