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  • I don't know if you remember this, but we've met before.

    我不知道你還記不記得,但我們以前見過

  • Oh, I remember. [audience laughs]

    喔,我記得[觀眾笑聲]

  • Do you remember this? It was really embarrassing for me.

    你記得?是不是我的糗事

  • [laughing] Yes.

    [笑聲]對

  • [Jimmy] It was? Do you want me to tell --

    [吉米]是嘛?要我說出來嗎?

  • Yeah! I have not seen you since then.

    好啊!自從那個事件後,我就再也沒看過你

  • I have not! That is correct. - Right? No.

    我也是!沒錯 對吧?不

  • But this is years ago, and I -- do you want me to tell my version of the story?

    但這已經好幾年了,你要我說出我自己的版本嗎?

  • Yeah, you tell your version. [laughter]

    好啊,你的版本[笑聲]

  • I'm walking down the street, in New York City,

    我在紐約市的街道走著,

  • - Yeah. - My friend Rick calls me and says,

    -對-然後瑞克打電話給我,他說

  • "Dude, what are you doing?"

    「你在做甚麼,老兄?」

  • I go, "I'm just walking down the street."

    我說「我在路上散步」

  • He goes, "I have Nicole Kidman with me,

    他說「妮可基曼跟我在一起,

  • and she wants to meet you for, uh, maybe, to be in Bewitched or something like that"

    她想要見你,可能是想讓你在神仙家庭亮相或其他原因。」

  • so I go, "Wha-? OK."

    我說「真假?好啊」

  • And he goes, "I can be at your apartment in like ten minutes."

    他接著說「我可以在十分鐘內到你的公寓」

  • I go, "You're going to bring Nicole Kidman over to my apartment?"

    我說「你要帶妮可基曼到我公寓?」

  • I'm like, "OK, I don't know, what do I do? What, do I have something? What do I do?"

    我那時好像接著說「好啊,我不知道,我該準備甚麼?」

  • He goes, "I dunno, just get some cheese and crackers or something,"

    他說「我不知,就準備起司或餅乾之類的,」

  • and I'm like, "Cheese and crackers! I'm --" [babbling]

    「起司和餅乾!我...」[口齒不清]

  • "I don't have dinner parties, I don't have anyone over to my house."

    「我沒有準備晚餐派對,沒有人要來我家」

  • I'm like, "I have video games and sneakers."

    「但我有電動和運動鞋」

  • [Nicole] That's right!

    [妮可]沒錯!

  • So I go and, I go, there's a deli, and I go in the deli.

    所以我繼續走著,看到一間熟食店

  • I go, "What do you mean, cheese?"

    我問他「你是指甚麼起司?」

  • He goes, "Get Brie or something."

    他說「準備布里乾酪或類似的」

  • I go, "Brie?" I didn't even know what that is, I'm like, "Uh ..."

    「布里乾酪?我連聽都沒聽過」我心情像是「呃....」

  • So I go in this -- I'm on Saturday Night Live, I guess,

    所以我就假裝--我在週六夜現場,也許吧,

  • or something, I don't remember, really, when it was --

    或其他,我忘了,那是...

  • I just remember I liked you and he was like -- not now.

    我只記得我喜歡你,然後他好--不是現在

  • [laughter] I'm married now.

    [笑聲]我已經結婚了

  • Um, but he was like, "Oh, well you can meet --"

    呃,他那時好像說「喔,你可以見到--」

  • [laughter] [band plays music]

    [笑聲][樂隊]

  • - What?! - Not that way!

    甚麼?! -不是那樣!

  • [Jimmy] Wait, wait, what's going on? Wait, what?

    [吉米]等等,發生甚麼事了?甚麼?

  • So he said -- [audience laughing]

    所以他說--[觀眾笑聲]

  • So Rick, our mutual friend, says, "Oh, you know Jimmy wants to meet you,

    所以瑞克,我們的朋友說「你知道吉米想見你,」

  • and you can go over to his apartment, and dadadada ..."

    「妳可以去他的公寓,然後趴趴趴...」

  • and I'm single, and I'm like, "OK, yeah, cool!"

    那時我單身,所以我說「好啊,蠻酷的!」

  • [Jimmy] Wait, what?!

    [吉米]甚麼?

  • - Yes!

    沒錯!

  • What?!? are you talking about? - Yes!

    你在公啥米? 是啊!

  • Did I date Nicole Kidman? Did we go out on a date?

    我跟妮可基曼約會過?那是約會嗎?

  • So I go over, though, and you're there in a baseball cap,

    所以我那時過去,然後你戴著棒球帽,

  • and like, nothing. Just like --

    像個小蝦米。就像--

  • I had Brie cheese!

    我有布里乾酪

  • And you wouldn't talk. You didn't say anything!

    你都不說話。你甚麼都沒說!

  • You were like, "Hey. Mm. Mm. Mm."

    你那時的反應「嘿,嗯嗯嗯」

  • [talking over each other about being nervous and not talking]

    [辯解]

  • [Jimmy] I didn't know this was a thing! I thought this was a movie!

    [吉米]我不知道是這樣!我以為是為了電影!

  • It was like a hang, it was meant to just, I dunno.

    我好像在掙扎,那應該只是,我不知道

  • And then you put a video game on or something --

    然後你開啟你的電動,還是...

  • [laughter]

    [笑聲]

  • and I'm like, "This is so bad."

    我的心情是「這爛透了」

  • [laughter, applause]

    [笑聲,鼓掌]

  • It was bad.

    很糟糕

  • [foghorn sound]

  • I swear, and you didn't talk at all!

    我發誓,你絕對沒說話

  • And so after about an hour and a half I thought,

    在一個半鐘頭後

  • "He has no interest. This is so embarrassing."

    「他沒興趣,真丟臉」

  • I had no clue at all!

    我完全沒有任何線索

  • [Nicole] And I left, and went, "OK, no chemistry."

    [妮可]最後我離去,「好吧,無化學反應」

  • And then I was like, "Maybe he's gay."

    我突然想想「說不定他是同志」

  • C'mon!! [band plays]

    拜託!

  • I'm outta here, take care.

    我要閃啦,祝好運

  • [Nicole] OK, now I'm gonna do the show!

    [妮可]好啊,那主持棒交給我

  • [cheering]

    [掌聲]

  • [Nicole] So tell me, Jimmy ...

    [妮可]告訴我,吉米...

  • [Jimmy] Well, doctor, I remember it like it was yesterday.

    [吉米]事實上,醫生,我覺得這件事好像昨天才發生似的

  • Nicole Kidman walked in my apartment --

    妮可基曼走進我的公寓

  • [Nicole] That was our date.

    [妮可]那是我們的約會

  • Do you remember what the apartment looked like?

    妳還記得公寓長怎樣嗎

  • [Nicole] Like, not much.

    [妮可]好像,不怎麼記得。

  • Anyway, we weren't meant to be, right?

    無論如何,我們本來就不該情定終生,對吧?

  • Wow, did you make a good decision.

    哇,妳是不是做了正確的抉擇

  • You made a great, fantastic decision. - You didn't! Anyway. It was like that.

    你做了最棒的抉擇-你沒有!總而言之,就像那樣。

  • [Jimmy] Oh my gosh! I am in shock right now!

    [吉米]天啊!我真的嚇到了!

  • But now, so nice, we're both married with kids.

    但現在,一切完好,我們都結婚,生兒育女了

  • [Jimmy] Yeah! I can't believe I dated Nicole Kidman! This is fantastic!

    [吉米]對啊!不能相信,我約了妮可基曼!太棒了!

  • You didn't!

    你才沒有

  • This is unbelievable! Unbelievable.

    難以置信

  • It was one of the most awkward moments ever.

    這是我遇過最蠢的一件事

  • [Nicole] You're red!

    [妮可]你臉紅了!

  • I really am! I'm in shock! - So am I!

    真的!我太震驚了!- 我也是!

  • I can't believe it. Ha, you're definitely embarrassed!

    我無法相信,你一定覺得很尷尬

  • Yeah, I mean, wow, my gosh! Are you friends with Rick any more?

    我的天啊!你跟瑞克還是朋友嗎?

  • Yes, I just saw him!

    我才剛看到他

  • [Jimmy] No, we don't talk to him after that, yeah.

    [吉米]沒有吧,我們沒再和他說過話

  • [Nicole] He's adorable!

    [妮可]他很可愛

  • You made a much better decision. Keith Urban is so much cooler than I am.

    妳做了更好的決定,凱斯比我酷多了

  • He's a rock star, you live in Nashville now ...

    他是搖滾明星,妳現在住在納許維爾

  • I do, yes.

    對,沒錯

  • He's always on tour, isn't he, constantly, like ...

    他一直在巡迴演出,對吧? 很常吧,像...

  • Yes, these country guys -- yes, he's always on tour --

    這些鄉巴佬--對,他一直在巡迴演出

  • [Nicole] You're not trying to be all serious!

    [妮可]你不是認真的吧

  • [Jimmy] No, I'm trying to be serious now. Look, here's the deal:

    [吉米] 對,我現在很認真,想想看,

  • I'm not always on tour. I'm always at home.

    我不常巡迴,我都在家裡

  • [laughter]

    [笑聲]

  • Kids ... - You're working all the time!

    小子們... 你常常在工作

  • Did he not just play a gig New Year's Eve, right?

    他在跨年夜是不是舉辦現場演唱?

  • He did, in Niagara Falls. - Yeah. Niagara Falls.

    對,在尼加拉瀑布。- 對,尼加拉瀑布

  • The Canada side or the New York side? - Um, the Canada side.

    加拿大那一邊還是紐約那一邊? -加拿大那一邊

  • That's the side. - Beautiful.

    就是那一邊- 很美

  • The Canada side is like lights, and it's almost like Vegas, it's fun.

    加拿大那一邊就是光芒四射,像拉斯維加斯,很有趣

  • The New York side looks like a Lemony Snicket book cover.

    紐約那一邊就像雷蒙·斯尼奇書的封面

  • Sad, and like, lots of trees with no leaves on it,

    讓人想哭,很多樹都枯掉了

  • and you go, "What happened? Why is that side so much worse?"

    妳會說「怎麼了嗎?為什麼那一邊那麼爛?」

  • Canada side, that's the place to do it. - Yeah.

    加拿大那一邊,好地點。- 對

  • It's amazing. Yeah, we gotta work on that side of Niagara Falls.

    很美妙,我們要在那一邊工作

  • So where does he play? - I've never been to the New York side.

    所以他在哪演出?- 我沒去過紐約那一邊。

  • Oh, it's ... please. We'll fix it up.

    那只是,拜託,我們會安排

  • Where does he play?

    他在哪演出?

  • He played a big show there for about 60,000 people.

    他在那表演,有差不多60000人

  • [Jimmy] Have you ever been to Niagara Falls?

    [吉米]妳有去過尼加拉瀑布嗎?

  • I had before.

    有啊

  • [Nicole] We can't even have a conversation.

    [妮可]我們連對方說話的聲音都聽不到

  • [Jimmy] You're feelin' a little something, yeah.

    [吉米]妳有感覺了,對吧

  • You're feelin' a little chemistry?

    有化學反應了?

  • A little chemistry now. But it's too late, baby!

    現在是有一點。 但寶貝,太遲咯。

  • Ship has sailed, OK Nicole?

    生米煮成熟飯了,妮可

  • Taken, OK? I'm taken, OK?

    我也已經是人夫了好不好,知道嗎?

  • I'm just kidding, just kidding.

    我只是開玩笑的

  • I can't believe this. What a day.

    我無法相信,真是美好的一天

  • [Nicole] I am never coming on this show again.

    [妮可]我在也不要上你的節目了

  • No, come on! Come on! You've gotta ... they're feeling it!

    不要這樣嘛!妳得...他們也感覺到了

  • This is fantastic!

    這很棒

  • [Nicole] I'm teasing you. [Jimmy] And we love Keith.

    [妮可]我在對你調情 [吉米]我們都愛凱斯

  • We love Keith. [Nicole] I love Keith!

    我們愛凱斯 [妮可]我愛凱斯!

  • We love Keith. He's been on the show. I know you love Keith more than I do.

    我們都愛凱斯,他有上過節目。 我知道妳比我更愛凱斯

  • I'm not saying I have a thing for Keith Urban.

    我不是指我跟他也有一腿

  • I'm saying I enjoy his music, and I like him as a personality.

    我的意思是我愛他的音樂,我喜歡他的個性

  • [Nicole] We're now fighting over Keith.

    [妮可]我們在爭風吃醋

  • I don't have a --

    我沒有--

  • Only one of us here is in love with Keith [Nicole] This is a disaster!

    只有我們其中一個愛上凱斯 [妮可] 這是災難!

  • No, it's not a disaster. Uh, but he's always been on the show,

    不,怎麼會是災難。呃,但他常常上節目

  • and you've never been on the show. - No.

    而妳從沒上過節目。-不

  • Is this why? - Absolutely.

    是這個原因嗎? 完全正確

  • [Jimmy] So odd!

    [吉米] 太怪了

  • No, I just, we would watch you at home, and I'd be like, "Gosh,

    不,我們在家會看你的節目,我會說「天啊,

  • will I ever go on that show and bring that story up? Hm, maybe not."

    我會不會上這個節目,說出這件事? 呃,也許不會」

  • [Jimmy] And you did! [Nicole] And now I did!

    [吉米]但妳說了! [妮可] 沒錯

  • Anyway, let's talk about Paddington. [Jimmy] This is the best day ever, man.

    對了,來談談電影【柏靈頓】 [吉米]這是最棒的一天

  • This is like a great day. Let's talk about Paddington.

    很棒的一天。好,來談電影

  • Paddington, congrats already, it's a big hit already.

    柏靈頓,先恭喜,那已經是大賣座

  • Internationally, right? - Yes.

    全世界轟動,對吧

  • Overseas. They released it overseas first. [giggles]

    他們先在海外發行

  • I remember I got Brie cheese ...

    我記得我有布里乾酪

  • And corn chips!

    還有玉米片

  • Corn chips! I didn't get -- did I get corn chips?

    玉米片!我沒有-- 我有準備玉米片嗎

  • Yeah! And some old Chinese food.

    對,還有中式傳統食物

  • How could I buy old Chinese food? - It was in the fridge.

    我哪有可能買中國食物?- 在冰箱裡

  • It was in the fridge. It probably was. Really there was nothing there.

    在冰箱裡,也許。 其實甚麼都沒有

  • [Nicole] See, I've got a good memory.

    [妮可]看我記憶多好

  • Oh my god, I remember I got saltine crackers,

    天啊,我記得我有薄鹽餅乾

  • and I didn't have ... oh, it was just really awful. I didn't know.

    我沒有... 喔,真的糟透了,我不知道。

  • And what sport do you really like? Baseball, or something ...

    你到底喜歡甚麼運動? 棒球還是..

  • [Jimmy] What sport I was into? What hat was I wearing?

    [吉米]我喜歡甚麼運動? 我戴甚麼帽子?

  • [Nicole] Yeah, you were wearing some baseball cap.

    [妮可] 對欸,你那時戴了某一頂棒球帽

  • I love that you remember I was wearing a baseball hat. Cool, man.

    很高興妳還記得,酷欸

  • [Nicole] And some sweats. [Jimmy] I was not wearing sweatpants!

    [妮可]還有運動褲 [吉米]我才沒有

  • What are you talkin' about?

    妳在說甚麼

  • It's like you went over to, like, Duck Dynasty guy's house, or something.

    就像妳去鴨子王朝演員的家

  • I was not wearing camo sweatpants. I was dressed in a ...

    我沒有穿迷彩褲,我穿的是...

  • probably in a three-piece suit or something ...

    應該是三件套裝,或是...

  • You weren't interested, so you wore sweats and a baseball cap.

    就是因為你沒興趣,所以你才穿運動褲和棒球帽

  • That's not true! I don't even know what you're talking about!

    才沒有!我連妳在說甚麼都不知道

  • Now I'm like freaking out. All right.

    我現在真的嚇到了

  • I'm gonna go back to Paddington, we're gonna edit this out.

    先回到柏靈頓,然後把這段剪掉

  • [Nicole] Yeah. Yeah.

    [妮可]好

  • The bear. - The bear.

    這隻熊-這隻熊

  • The little adorable bear. - It's a cute bear. It's a cute movie.

    這隻小可愛熊- 很可愛,這部片很可愛

  • You play the villain in the movie. - I do.

    妳在電影是反派- 對

  • That's a good juicy role. - Yep.

    很誘惑他人的角色- 對

  • [Jimmy] Did you always want to play -- what?

    [吉米]妳是不是常常想扮演-- 甚麼?

  • [laughter]

    [笑聲]

  • [Nicole] Can't even talk to you now!

    [妮可]現在都不知道要怎麼跟你說話了

  • [Jimmy] I mean you can't even say, you're stuttering and stuff, you're so nervous.

    [吉米] 不只無法說,還口齒不清了,妳好緊張喔

  • Only because you make me laugh now.

    因為你在逗我笑

  • I make you laugh, yeah. I always made you laugh.

    我逗妳笑,我常常逗妳笑

  • All right, so let's talk about it., my man Hugh Bonneville.

    好吧,回到主題,休·邦尼維爾,我的男主角

  • [Nicole] So funny. So funny. - Love him. Downton Abbey, we love him.

    [妮可]很好笑-- 喜歡他在唐頓莊園

  • And there's a CGI bear and of course everyone knows the books.

    還有那個CGI熊。每個人都知道這本書

  • But the bear does have the most beautiful eyes.

    這隻熊有最美的眼睛

  • No, he does!

    真的

  • [Jimmy] Yeah! He does!

    [吉米] 對啦

  • [Nicole] Why are you laughing?

    [妮可]你在笑甚麼?

  • [Jimmy] Everyone's feelin' the sexual chemistry here,

    [吉米]每個人都有感受到化學反應

  • and it's awkward, and it's just odd.

    那很蠢,很怪

  • [band plays]

    [樂隊演奏]

  • Wanna play Mario Brothers?

    想玩馬力歐嘛

  • I'll show you my new Nintendo. That's pretty cool.

    我向妳展示新的任天堂電玩 ,蠻酷的

  • I can't believe that's real, that story.

    我無法相信這故事是真的

I don't know if you remember this, but we've met before.

我不知道你還記不記得,但我們以前見過

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