B1 中級 其他腔 1693 分類 收藏
I have to do this. All the people that are waiting on me.
This has gone on long enough.
This ends now!
Dude, stop pushing so hard.
That's why you keep getting hemorrhoids.
It's time to DU- DU- DU- DU- DU- DU- DU- DU- Duel!
Now remember Yugi, when you start to stutter...
go ahead and calm down and take it slow.
It's time to d- du- duel.
Very good.
News anchor: And now to Pallet Town...
where a local man was found guilty of animal cruelty.
Reporters: Ash! Ash! Ash! Ash!
Reporter 1: Is it true that you abused animals?
Ash: No comment.
Reporter 1: What do you have to say to people who capture wild animals and keep them in confined balls?
Reporter 2: What about the accusation you are part of a pet underground battling society?
Reporter 3: Do you regret picking a Pikachu?
Ash: No comment.
Reporter 3: Ash, what about the threesome with you Brock and Misty?
It was always just Brock.
Reporters: ASH! Ash! Ash!
Oh oops.
Did you just call me sausage?
That's not even a good joke.
No no no no. Sorry
The script must have auto corrected Sasuke...
to sausage.
You know I was just going to hurt you, Naruto.
But now I'm going to kill you!
Prepare yourself, Naruto.
Are you gonna do it, or?
Just shut up, okay?
Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to remember all of this?
I mean, do you really have to do all that sign language?
I mean, we already have subtitles.
I said, shut up!
Okay. Sorry.
Seriously, how much longer are you gonna -
I'm almost done! Can you just let me finish?
Fine! Just hurry up.
Now where was I?
Say goodbye, Naruto.
I mean, it's cool that they put us in this magazine and all, but...
I don't really appreciate how they photoshopped us.
Hey, Sailor Moon.
I mean, I know you're the leader and all, but...
I was wondering, maybe we could switch planets for this year?
Yeah, we should do that.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind that.
No, Sailor Jupiter. We've been through this. The planets represent who we are!
But, I want to be Sailor Moon!
You're too big to be a moon!
You're the biggest one!
That's why you're Jupiter!
Ugh, you bitch! I'm self-conscious.
And, Sailor Saturn, you're the only one that can hula hoop here.
I said I know HULA.
I never said hula HOOP!
And I can hula hoop a little bit. I can switch with Saturn.
No, because you have to be Mars.
You're the manliest one, and men are from Mars.
Well, if men are from Mars, then women have to be from Venus...
and Sailor Venus don't look very womanly.
-Actually, that saying is wrong. -What?
Women aren't from Venus.
Hermaphrodites are.
Hermaphrodites? You mean people with both parts?
Yeah, a penis and a vagina.
I don't even want to switch planets!
I'm proud to have a vagina-penis!
I'm proud to have a Venus!
Well, why can't I be Sailor Moon?
I moon just as many people as you do.
Yeah, but I keep my shorts on, Sailor Uranus.
Are you slut shaming me?
Guys, can I not be Pluto anymore?
Oh yeah. I'm not part of the group anymore.
Hey guys, smell your armbands. It's so...
Girls, right?
-(girl voice) Uh, what is that supposed to mean?-
(man voice) No, no, no, no, I just meant that girls fight a lot.
-And guys don't!?-
Yeah, I mean - but we just use our fists!
-So do we!-
If you're looking for strength,
if you're looking for a strong blade,
if you're looking...to
become stronger than you've ever been before
Then come on down to Bleach's Cuts and Hairstyles for Anime Heroes!
Where we cut and hairstyle - ALL anime heroes!
Men hairstyles to women hairstyles...
short, long, horny...
We do it all here at Bleach's Cuts and Hairstyles for Anime Heroes!
You want that Super Saiyan look without all that Super Saiyan training?
Well, I'm sayin',
here at Bleach's Cuts and Hairstyles for Anime Heroes...
Of course we're gonna specialize in bleach and hair!
We bleached some of the most famous heroes in anime!
Heroes you probably thought were AALL natural.
Goku to Naruto...
to Lucy from Fairy Tail!
We even bleached Sailor Uranus!
I mean, Pikachu used to be brown, but we got to him!
'Cause like the saying goes...
No what?
You - your shoelaces are untied.
You almost fell and uh...
hit these bricks down.
Hey, thanks man. That's really nice of you.
Are you supposed to be One Punch Man?
I can pretty much defeat any anime hero with one punch.
Every anime hero?
Not too sure what I can do with that.
I guess I could paint an arrow on your head,
you could look like Aang.
Oh! Thank God.
Just, uh, sign here
I don't remember ordering anything but...
Wait, I don't think I ordered this.
You're from Bleach, right?
Yeah, that was for you.
I don't even know what these are.
What are these? Like colored rocks?
Yes, it says here that they are rocks, but it's a French brand.
So it's not "color", it's "colour"... rocks.
It's Clorox Bleach.
Wha - what are you -
What are you doing here?
Just... dragging balls. See? (Dragon Ball Z)
Hey man! What's with all the commotion?
My shoes keep coming untied,
no matter how hard I tighten them....
Oh, I've got the perfect thing for you.
What is that?
It's a tack.
How is that gonna help me tighten my shoes?
Just stick it into your shoelace and it gets tighter.
It's a tack to tighten. (Attack on Titan)
Oh cool! This Fairy Tail shirt's only $9.99!
I guess you could say it's some pretty "fair retail".
You suck!
Okay! Enough with the bad puns already! Okay, I get it.
One Pun-ch Man.
Okay, you make puns. Very funny, I get it.
Actually, I'm not One Punch Man anymore.
What? The square root of 4? What? I don't get it.
I'm "four-root" punch.
Seriously? Fruit Punch? That's the best you can do?
Okay now, you really did go too far.
You can't make that joke. You're Asian.
I know. That's why now I'm...
Okay, really did just cross the line on that one.
Actually, I'm uh... still on it.
Look. Enough is enough already.
A- Aren't you supposed to be One Punch... just one pun?
How many puns did you made already?
I don't know. Anywhere from one to a ton.
Wh- what?
Aha! See?
I tricked you! You crossed the "too-many-puns-for-one-video" line...
And now you can't make anymore!
So now, I can finally go ahead in this video without a dumb pun.
Well, you didn't say that was a rule.
Yeah it is! You crossed the line, so you make anymore puns.
If you say so.
Yes! I do.
But just so I'm clear, this line represents the last pun of the video, right?
So, technically then, this line is kind of the line I'm saying right now.
Because it's the last...
punch line.


當動漫人物出現在現實世界 (Anime in Real Life!)

1693 分類 收藏
Lily Wu 發佈於 2016 年 11 月 6 日
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