字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 YOU KNOW, ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT HOSTING A TALK SHOW IS THAT THERE'S JUST SO DARN MUCH TO TALK ABOUT. SOMETIMES TOO MUCH. HOW DO YOU CHOOSE? I DON'T KNOW. MY SOLUTION IS NOT TO CHOOSE AT ALL AND LET TECHNOLOGY TAKE CONTROL. THIS IS... >> AUDIENCE: WHEEL! OF! NEWS! ♪ (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> Stephen: OH! PEOPLE LOVE THE WHEEL! AS YOU KNOW, WE'VE INSTALLED A GIANT SPINNING WHEEL ON THE DOME OF THE ED SULLIVAN THEATER WITH TOPICS LIKE "SPORTS," "ENTERTAINMENT" AND "CHINA" -- WHICH ISN'T A CATEGORY, IT'S WHERE WE HAD THE WHEEL MADE. (LAUGHTER) THEN I'M GOING TO SPIN THE WHEEL AND WHEREVER IT LANDS, THAT'S THE STORY I TALK ABOUT. BRENDAN! SAY HI TO BRENDAN, EVERYBODY! (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) BRENDAN. BRENDAN IS OUR LEAVER. BRENDAN, GET DOWN AND HOLD THE LEVER FOR US. BRENDAN. WHEN YOU WERE IN COLLEGE, DID YOU THINK THIS WAS WHAT YOU WOULD BE DOING WITH YOUR CAREER? >> NO. I WAS HOPING. >> Stephen: LET THAT BE A LESSON. STUDY HARD. OKAY. GET IN THERE. COME ON. IN THE PIT. ALL RIGHT. (CHEERING) WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY FOR THAT BUT WE HAVE NOT COME UP WITH LEVER TECHNOLOGY. DOWN HERE. READY, BRENDAN? >> READY. >> Stephen: HERE WE GO! SPIN IT! (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) "RELIGION!" PROTESTS HAVE BROKEN OUT IN NAPLES, ITALY, BECAUSE THE PEOPLE THERE ARE AFRAID THE VATICAN WANTS TO SEIZE CONTROL OF JEWELS BELONGING TO THE CITY'S PATRON, SAINT GENNARO. INCLUDING, "SILVER BUSTS," "HEAVILY JEWELED NECKLACES AND EARRINGS," "A GOLDEN MITRE" AND A "CEREMONIAL HEADDRESS STUDDED WITH DIAMONDS, RUBIES AND EMERALDS." SO I WANT TO TAKE A SECOND HERE AND ADDRESS THE VATICAN DIRECTLY. GUYS-- AND I FEEL COMFORTABLE SAYING GUYS BECAUSE THIS IS THE VATICAN. I SAY THIS OUT OF LOVE -- YOU HAVE TOO MANY JEWELS. I HAVE BEEN TO THE VATICAN. IT IS LIKE LIBERACE MEETS "HOARDERS." YOU SHOULDN'T BE ADDING ANY MORE TREASURE. YOU SHOULD BE MAKING THREE PILES IN THE POPE'S DRIVEWAY -- KEEP THROW OUT, DONATE. BUT NOT TO THE CHURCH! THAT WON'T HELP. AND BE HONEST, WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU EVEN SAT IN THE CHAIR OF SAINT PETER? YOU JUST USE IT TO HANG YOUR VESTMENTS. ALL RIGHT, LET HER RIP. "CLIP WITHOUT CONTEXT!" CLIP ME, JIMMY! >> NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! NOT GOING TO HAPPEN! >> STEPHEN: NO, IT'S NOT. LET'S SPIN. "A RECENT STUDY!" IN A RECENT STUDY, RESEARCHERS ARE HAVING DRUG ADDICTS STRAP ON VIRTUAL REALITY HEADSETS TO SEE IF THEY'RE MORE LIKELY TO RESIST HEROIN IN DIFFERENT SIMULATED ENVIRONMENTS, ONE "WHERE THE DRUG IS SNORTED AND ONE WHERE IT IS INJECTED." THAT HAS GOT REAL WORLD APPLICATION BECAUSE YOU KNOW HOW JUNKIES ARE ALWAYS LIKE "WAIT A SECOND, YOU'RE OFFERING ME HEROIN IN A DIFFERENT WAY THAN I'M USED TO? I'M OUT OF HERE! BUT FIRST, I'LL TAKE ALL THAT HEROIN." SPIN! (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) AND THE WHEEL OF NEWS LANDS ON... "NEWS!" LAST NIGHT WAS THE EIGHTH DEMOCRATIC DEBATE, IN FLORIDA. AT THIS POINT, BERNIE AND HILLARY REALLY SEEM LIKE JUST ANOTHER OLD COUPLE TRAVELING THE COUNTRY, ARGUING ABOUT MONEY. ( AS SANDERS ) "EXCUSE ME, I'M TALKING." EXCUSE MY. ( AS HILLARY ) "WHY IS THE CAR MAKING THAT NOISE? I TOLD YOU, YOU SHOULD HAVE BAILED OUT THE AUTO INDUSTRY!" ( AS SANDERS ) "ZIP ZIP. IN DENMARK, WE WOULD BE RIDING BIKES!" BUT THERE WERE A FEW STAND OUT MOMENTS, LIKE WHEN SECRETARY CLINTON DROPPED THIS SHOCKING CONFESSION. >> LOOK, I HAVE SAID BEFORE AND IT WON'T SURPRISE ANYONE TO HEAR ME SAY IT. THIS IS NOT EASY FOR ME. I AM NOT A NATURAL POLITICIAN, IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED, LIKE MY HUSBAND OR PRESIDENT OBAMA. >> STEPHEN: THAT'S RIGHT. HILLARY CLINTON IS NOT A NATURAL POLITICIAN, UNLIKE HER OPPONENT, THAT SMOOTH OPERATOR, "SLICK BERNIE SANDO."
B1 中級 遲來的新聞輪III (The Late Show Wheel Of News III) 14 3 VoiceTube 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字