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  • Have I ever told you the story about how I met your grandfather?

    我有沒有跟你說過,我與你爺爺是如何認識的?

  • He was a charmer.

    他是個很有魅力的人。

  • I was at the park one day when this man walked up that I'd never met and said, "I've been staring at you for the last hour. You're all I can think about."

    有天我在公園時,有個陌生男子向我走來並對我說:「我已經看著你一個小時了,我滿腦子都是你。」

  • My heart was a flutter.

    我的心噗通噗通地跳著。

  • This guy was just staring at me. Then he walks up and essentially says he's obsessed with me.

    這個男人就一直盯著我,然後朝著我走了過來,跟我說他被我迷住了。

  • I took him for a playboy so I declined, of course.

    我把他視為一個玩咖,想當然爾地拒絕了他。

  • But your grandfather was persistent. He wouldn't take no for an answer.

    但你爺爺很堅持,他無法接受被我拒絕。

  • I told him flat out, I wasn't interested. But he wouldn't take a hand.

    我直截了當地告訴他我對他沒興趣,但他不願意接受。

  • He sent two dozen roses to my office.

    他送了兩打玫瑰到我的辦公室。

  • I show up to work and there are two fucking bushels of roses on my desk.

    我去上班的時候,看到兩打令人厭惡的玫瑰放在我的辦公桌上。

  • My co-workers thought my mom died.

    我的同事還以為我媽過世了。

  • He finally won me over and I agreed to go out with him that night.

    他終於贏得我的心,我也同意那天晚上與他約會。

  • I said I would have one drink with him, in a public place.

    我告訴他我可以和他喝一杯,但必須是在公共場合。

  • When he pulled up at my house, he looked at me and smiled. And I said, "Why are you so happy?"

    當他出現在我家門前,他看著我並露出笑容。我問:「為何你這麼開心呀?」

  • And he said, "Because I have a date with a girl that I'm gonna marry."

    他回答:「因為我正與一個我未來將娶的女孩子約會。」

  • Yeah, he fucking said that.

    沒錯,他就是這樣說的。

  • We were dancing and when this other boy tried to cut in, your grandfather sucked him right in the jaw.

    當我們在跳舞時,有另一個男生試著插進來,你爺爺給了他一個上勾拳。

  • He punched Mike. We were just dancing.

    他竟然揍了麥克,我們只不過是在跳舞。

  • I still have a necklace he gave me that night. It was a family heirloom.

    我仍然戴著他那晚給我的項鍊,這是個傳家寶。

  • He asked me to wear his mother's pearls.

    他要我戴他媽媽的珍珠項鍊。

  • After our date, he wrote me the most beautiful love letter with his most animate feelings.

    他在我們約會完後,用他最真摯的情感寫了一封很美的情書。

  • I feel like I've known you my entire life.

    我覺得我好像認識你了一輩子。

  • Again, after hanging out once.

    重申一次,我們只約出去一次而已。

  • Of course, my father didn't approve. So, he sneak up the rain pipe and climb in my window.

    當然,我的爸爸並不同意。所以,他偷偷地爬水管上來,來到我窗前。

  • This fucking psycho shows up to my apartment at 2 a.m. without so much as a text.

    這討人厭的神經病竟然在凌晨兩點出現在我的公寓,甚至沒有先傳個訊息。

  • I called the cops and I didn't put down the kitchen knife until they showed up.

    我撥電話給警察,等到他們來了才敢把刀子放下。

  • From then on, we were inseparable. We've married for 50 wonderful years.

    從此之後,我們再也分不開,我們已經結婚五十年了。

  • I bought a handgun, moved to a new burrow and legally changed my name.

    我買了一支手槍,搬到新住所並且合法地改了我的名字。

  • I still think about him everyday.

    至今,我還是每天想起他。

  • What was that?

    那是什麼?

  • Hey guys, I'm Murf from College Humor.

    嗨,大家好,我是來自 College Humor 的 Murf。

  • Click here to subscribe, here to watch more videos or anywhere else you damn well please, ok?

    訂閱的話請點這邊,想要看更多影片請點這邊,或者隨便你想點哪就點哪,好嗎?

  • Don't let the government tell you where you can and cannot click.

    別讓政府告訴你什麼能點、什麼不能點。

  • I've got some literature on the subject.

    我這有很多關於這個主題的文章。

Have I ever told you the story about how I met your grandfather?

我有沒有跟你說過,我與你爺爺是如何認識的?

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