I know this kind of stuff. Don't mess up.

Just smile.

Thank you very much. [ Chuckles ]

Mr. Brewster and Mr. Nolan,

you're charged with assault and battery, [ Chuckles ]

- resisting arrest... - [ Chuckling Continues ]

and destruction of private property.

How do you plead ? Guilty or not guilty ?

Oh, guilty but with a real good excuse.

You're gonna love it, really. I think everyone here will. I-I plead innocent.

You see, Your Honor, What you have here...

with Mr. Brewster and myself, is a couple of, well, local heroes, really.

We play for a local team. You might have seen us-- the Hackensack Bulls ?

Perhaps you know the-- "Go, you Bulls, go."

Let's not waste the court's time.

I have depositions from over a dozen eyewitnesses.

Your Honor, we went into the bar to have a drink, and we saw this nice lady,

and we asked her to sit with us to have a drink,

I didn't know she had a fiance. Did you know ? Who knew ?

I didn't know. It wasn't public knowledge. I didn't know, either.

So you were making advances to a woman who was involved with another man.

You see, if you don't make calls, you don't make sales.

[ Laughs ] This man does not represent me, Your Honor.

I would remove that from the court records. I would--

I'm going to set your bail at $3,000.

[ Brewster Groans ] Not bad.

We don't have $3,000. We don't.

Bailiff, will you remove the prisoners. Next case. [ Both Stammering ]

Your Honor, wait. Please, before you send us to jail--

Look, I tried to defend myself. The man hit me first.

[ All Shouting ] With the permission of the court !

My name is J.B. Donaldo,

and I'm representing parties who wish to remain anonymous...

and who have instructed me to post bail for the defendants...

or pay any fines levied in case they plead guilty,

which I'm sure they will now do.

Yeah. Who is he ? It's the scout.

[ Laughing ] Oh, yeah. I told you they want me.

They want me. We're goin' to the big time ! This is it.