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After the mind-blowing success of the Avengers
the game changing thrill of the winter Solidier
and the unexpected surprise of Guardians of the Galaxy
You thought there was no way the next Avengers could lift up to the high
You were right.
Avengers, Age of Ultron
I mean it's definitely good
but just not great
You know I mean, like certainly enjoyable
but you know
man... we're gonna catch hell for this, are we?
When the Mandarin seemingly killed Iron Man
and took the president hostage
The Avengers didn't assemble
When Malaga almost destroyed the universe
the Avengers didn't assemble
And when a terroist organization infiltrated Shield
and came just seconds away from killing millions
the Avengers still didn't assemble
But when a remote Hydra base might be hiding something
every single avenger is assembling all up in his business
for even more
group shots
Hey, does that mean we can finally stop using this one?
Joss Whedon is back at the helm
and more beat down than ever
In the second one Job just got harder
I have all these restrictions
but also I will lead guidelines
As he does his best to meet the unrealistic nerd expectations
and tries to make a stand alone sequel
as good as Empire Strikes Back or Godfather, too
that also sets up a civil war
Everytime someone tries to win the war before it starts, innocent people die.
and sets up an Infinity war
A mind stone is the fourth from the infinity stones that show up in the last few years
and sets up Thor: Ragnarok
We are all dead, can you not see it?
and sets up Black Panther
Wakanada? Wa... Wa..Wa... Wakanda
and fitting Disney Corp. cross pormotions
Gentlemen, strings, son and fun
In a juggling act so insanely difficult
he turned down the sequel, quit Twitter
and doen't have any new films in development
Oh...ah...guys...
I think we just broke Joss Whedon
He needs a hug.
Experience the movie equivalent of empty engine and tire toy box
and smashing all your action figures into each other
as the Avengers roster bloats even further
with Vision, Scarlet Which and Quicksilver
who for some reason are never called
Vision, Scarlet Which or Quicksilver
one as a lame Russian knock off of the X-man
that Fox did way better
one has hand wavy mind control powers
and can also stop trains
and the other is a beam shooting 3D printed by vanadium robot plus Jarvis plus the mind stone
who can fly and makes capes?
What?
Can one of you guys explain Vision to me?
I have no idea who or what it is.
You've seen great Marvel movie villains
like Loki
and...
no...
definitely not
not even close
guess this is still just Loki
Now get ready for another generically evil one-off villain who hates the Avengers for reasons
with an over complicated plot to evolve
and or destroy the world by turning an Estern European city into a meteor
Not a great plan
You've been waiting for years to see your heros come together again
Now watch them fight for limited screen time
for a brush side plot like
Black Widow's black swan school
Thor's magic Jacuzzi
If the water spirit accepts me, I can return to my dream.
Captain America's old party theme
and the most out of left field love story
since Spock and Uhura
but don't worry, there's still plenty of time left over for your least favorite Avengers
to become your third or fourth least favorite Avenger
Oh... ok... good for you
We like you now
Get ready for everything you love about the first Avengers's movie all over again
Mind control again...
Looking for Loki's scepter again...
A Thanos's tease again...
A final showdown against the faceless army with a ticking clock again...
and tons of
reeps...
we are under !@#$%^&* you don't want me, do you
Guy's multiplying faster than a catholic rabbit
we won't hold it against you if you can get it up.
and he did a banksy of the crime scene
with the advantages of...
Stop quipping!
It's a good talk.
You know it wasn't.
I didn't say you could leave.
You are not worth it.
*
language
you son of the bitch
kiss your mother with that mouth?
You and Banner better not be playing hide the zucchini
Obviously you never made an omlet
you beat me by one second
Oh man. These things are gonna to be insufferable when Ant man the Star-Lord show up
Starring...
Mr. Roggers
Hank Pym
Beats by Bruce
Good luck finding her action figure
Archer
Farm and furious
So that's what Andy Serkis looks like
Resting witch face
The quick and the dead
CGI balls
Super Siri
Skynet
And the new Avengers
Yeah~
Avengers, Roughly One Week of Ultron
I'm calling it.
The shield helicarrier will become the NCU's eagles
The eagles are coming.
Be sure to subcribe
for more honest trailers
my tight are way to tight
The call is coming from inside...your phone
Not the face, never the face.
There are no strings on me
Clowns Farting
Rub-a-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub
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【超誠實影評】原來復仇者聯盟 2 這麼瞎!?(Honest Trailers - Avengers: Age of Ultron)

23333 分類 收藏
葉子維 發佈於 2015 年 10 月 19 日    葉子維 翻譯    Jack Lu 審核
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