I think I like reggae because it's like listening to a party.

我喜歡聽雷鬼，因為聽起來很有派對感

It's like almost company, in a sense.

在某種意義上，像種陪伴

[Jamian Juliano-Villani, artist]

藝術家 Jamian Juliano-Villani

It's music that's actually made from necessity.

音樂其實是需求下的產物

They built their own soundsystems,

它們制造出自身的音響系統

their own speakers,

自己的音箱

their own recording devices,

它們自身的錄音設備

and, like, they just used the shit that they had.

它們只是用自己有的這些東西

["New York Close Up"]

聚焦紐約

Well, that's kind of what I do, too.

嗯，這也是我正在做的事

Like, I make my paintings out of necessity

比如，我畫畫也是出於需要

and like using the things around me to communicate what I need to,

比如運用我身邊的東西來與我需要做的事相互溝通

because I'm really bad at articulating how I feel,

因為我非常不擅長直言不諱的表達自己的感受

vocally.

感受

The paintings do that for me.

我的畫替我這麼做了

["Jamian Juliano-Villani's Painting Compulsion"]

【標題】Jamian Juliano-Villani的繪畫沖動

[CLICKING SOUNDS FROM CAMERA PHONE SHUTTER]

手機照相的快門聲

I just like this book because

我就像這本書

it's like really basic ways to compare things.

用非常間單的方式對事物進行比較

When I look at something, I just take notes of ideas.

當我看著某個東西，我會把想法都記下來

Green. Suede. Fleece.

綠色 ，山羊皮，羊毛

Tower of Babel.

巴別塔

Microscopic life.

顯微鏡下的生物

Hummingbird. Hand and egg. Daddy long legs.

蜂鳥，手和雞蛋，長腳蜘蛛

Daddy super long legs.

超級長腳蜘蛛

And you know that daddy long legs are the most poisonous spider in the world?

妳們知道其實長腳蜘蛛是世界上最毒的蜘蛛嗎

Except that they don't have teeth.

除了它們沒有牙齒

So if they had teeth, you would be dead.

要是有，妳就完蛋了

For the one I'm doing now with the feet,

我目前在做的是關於腿的創作

those are Bruce Nauman feet.

這些是Bruce Nauman的腿

I want the feet to somehow look scared,

我希望這些腿看起來很可怕

if I could figure that out.

如果我可以自己領悟出來的話

So maybe a daddy long legs would do it.

也許長腿蜘蛛可以做到

Ever since I was little, I just kind of have this registry of facts in my brain.

打小，從我記事以來，我就喜歡記錄各種事情

In high school, I used to keep scrap books of all the things that I liked.

到了高中，我又做了很多剪貼簿

I would just cut them out and put them in there and save them.

把我喜歡的東西都剪下來，貼在本子上

And I think that these are the kinds of things that made me feel comfortable.

我做這些事情的時候感到非常的舒服

And it seemed so natural, when I started painting,

接著一切都那麼順其自然，我開始畫畫了，

to kind of do the same thing.

繼續做著類似的事情

When I'm working, I have probably, like, thirty images that,

當我創作的時候，我一個月或兩個月內，

in a month or two months, I'll keep on coming back to.

差不多有30張圖片，反復比劃著

I really will try to make those work with what I'm doing.

我會盡力把這些作品融入到我手頭上在做的東西中

But, they never look like they're supposed to be together.

雖然它們看上去並不怎麼和諧

That's when shit gets good.

但總有一切完美融合的時刻

That's when the painting can change from "an image-based narrative" into something else.

那一刻也是繪畫把圖像的敘述轉變為其他東西的時刻

So, it could get dark or surreal

所以，它可能會變得黯淡或虛渺

or funny or fucked up--

也可能會是有趣的或者整個一團糟

it's like I'm trying to deliver a baby, you know?

妳知道嗎，這壹切就好似我在努力生孩子那樣

And the baby is, like, really...

而這個寶寶就像，真的就像

has like eight arms and is really fucked up

有八個手臂而且真的是一團糟

and, like, I don't know how to deliver a baby, you know?

要知道，我可不了解真正生孩子是什麼樣的

I'm trying to figure out what kind of person this is going to be.

我正在努力搞清楚它會以怎樣的面孔呈現

Because I don't think it should be as simple as a human face,

因為我覺得這不大會是一個普通人的面孔那麼間單

and I also don't know if it should just be an animal, either.

當然也不會是一個動物的面孔

But, right now, I'm kind of just scrolling through a bunch of images.

然而現在，我只是在不斷瀏覽各種各樣的圖片

I'm just going to plop around and see what feels right.

不斷的瀏覽，看哪些是對味的

No.

不

Too dumb.

太傻了

So this is Shen Koo. I really like his work.

這是Shen Koo，我很喜歡他的作品

He's like this, kind of, crazy apocalyptic illustrator.

他就是那種超級有才的插畫家

The reason why I use cartoons a lot of the times

我運用大量的卡通元素的主要原因是

is because I like that they're a kind of populist way of communicating.

我喜歡它們那種純粹的溝通方式

Because painting is not populist at all, you know?

妳要知道，繪畫可壹點都不純粹

--I kind of like that idea.

我很喜歡這個想法

I respond to things immediately

我回應事情十分及時

in like an emotional, guttural way,

並富有感情的大聲說出來

and that's how decisions are formed.

這也是我整理所有思緒的方式

It's like when something pisses you off.

有時候，當有些東西十分困擾妳

Something stresses you out.

讓妳感到十分壓抑

Or, you like the color of something.

又或者，妳喜歡某洋東西的顏色

You're like, "I like that sweater,"

比如說，我喜歡那件毛衣

"Fuck it, I want that sweater."

靠，我想要那件毛衣

You know? It's like...

妳懂這種感覺嗎

[SNAPS FINGERS] Like that.

就像這樣

[SOUND OF A CAR SCREECHING TO A HALT AND THEN CRASHING]

急剎車的聲音

I feel much better about doing the paintings I do by using other references

通過使用別的參考來作畫的感覺比以前棒多了

so it's not so insular--

所以這並不是孤立的

it's not so personal.

也不是私密的

They're also helping me figure out

這些東西也是幫助我理解

the things that I can't communicate yet to myself.

我本身無法用言語表達出來的東西

The one painting I did with the wavy fox in that cage,

有一次，我創作了一個關於籠子裏的大脾氣狐貍

that's fucking me, you know!?

這讓我操碎了心，妳知道嗎

That's how I felt.

這是我當時的感受

I didn't realize it then.

我到現在才知道

I think they're all extensions of me

我覺得他們都是我的延伸

or self-portraits in some way--

又或者是另一種的自畫像

or at least an attitude that I have.

或至少呈現了我擁有的態度

Those are things you can't necessarily put into words.

這些東西并不是妳能用言語表達出來的

And, like, having a really rough childhood...

比如說，我童年過得十分坎坷

And, I also have a twin,

我還是個雙胞胎

so it was really hard for me to talk to other people.

對我來說，和別人交談是非常難的

I would just talk to my twin, and that would be it, you know?

我只需要和我的雙胞胎說話就可以了

And, like, I didn't need any friends.

就像，我不需要其他朋友

And I didn't really have any friends growing up, you know?

在我的成長過程中，我也沒有其他朋友

Like, maybe two?

好像有兩個

One of them was my sibling.

其中一個就是我的雙胞胎

Uh, doesn't really count.

妳看，這其實不能算

I think because of that, I have a hard time communicating with people,

我覺得也是因為這個原因，我曾經一度很難與別人溝通

or, like, connecting with people.

或者說和別人產生聯系

Having to, like, basically just rely on myself.

可以說基本上都是靠自己

It's like, if I don't take care of myself, no one else will.

如果我沒有照顧好自己的話，沒有人會

I have this obsessive relationship with my work and the way I work

這種糾結的關係和我的作品還有我創作的方式密不可分

because it's kind of like my friend.

有點像我的朋友

It's like the thing that validates me--makes me feel good.

這種能夠讓我實現自我價值的事物讓我感覺良好

I care about it and they care about me.

我們相互關心著彼此

It's why I put the things that I collect--and really, really love--

這也是為什麼我要收集這些我愛的東西

in my paintings, you know?

然後把它融入到我的作品中

Like, they're almost company, in a sense.

要知道，在某種程度上，他們是一種陪伴