♫♪ romantic music ♫♪

prrrrrr!

(Tom) Shhhh!

Please shut your mouth

(Tom) The time for talking is over.

(Tom) I'm a man of action.

(Tom) Uh...

[flicking]

Uh.. please... wait there for one moment.

Is there a trick to this one at all?

Let me do it for you.

[♫♪ music reaches crescendo ♫♪]

[moaning]

[tv on in the background / cricket commentary]

What are you doing?

Watching TV... What are you doing?

I am building a time machine.

(Tom) I can see that... Why are you building a time machine?

(Matt) Because you can't remember anything.

(Tom) Pfft. Name one thing I can't remember.

(Matt) The fact that I won THAT bearsuit.

(Tom) Ahh! You mean MY bear suit?

(Matt) See what I mean? That's... that's why I'm building a time machine.

Good. Now I can go back in time and prove that you're a homo. [laughs]

(Matt) Do it, Tom! And then I... can go back to the year 10 formal...

...and prove that you didn't tongue-pash Katie Hill.

hehehehahahahaHAHAHA!

Who says tongue pash??

[cricket commentary]

[scratching]

(Tom) [signs] Would you like a hand, Matt?

(Matt) No, it's just a time machine, Tom. Don't worry about it.

(Matt) ...I don't want you to miss the action of that five-day Test Match.

(Tom) [groans] That's OK. They're at drinks anyway, mate.

So... have you got a plan?

(Matt) Check this out.

(Tom) [scoffs]

(Matt) [yelling] Yeh, I drew it up at the party last night!!

(Tom) [laughs] Looks like a carousel, stuck to a car with a clock attached to it.

(Tom) So, what's with the ShizerNeuker? [kicks microwave]

(Matt) Hey! ...It's a microwave. micro.... wave...?

(Matt) Displacement??

(Matt) Gravitational Time Dillution...?

(Matt) .... Entropy...??

(Tom) And the clock?

(Matt) How many cordials have you had?

(Tom) Seven. So, once we figure out the bear suit business, what next?

(Matt) I think I'd like to meet Jesus. Just to see how black he really was.

(Matt) I'm picturing 'dark chocolate'.

(Tom) I want to see the dinosaurs.

(Matt) Ooooh - you're a brave man, Thomas.

(Tom) 1993. Jurassic Park. I never got to see it at the cinemas.

(Matt) Oh. You missed out on this then.

Rrrowrrowwowowoworrroooarr!

That's Tyrannusaurus Rex, Tom!

(Tom) Yup. So, is this thing going to even work? [door swinging]

[Matt] Oh... my... god....

It works!

[body hitting the floor]

(Tom) Homo!

♪ Music ♪ [Electronic / Bouncy] \r�