I really don't know what to do about Fiona.

我真的不知道該如何處理菲奧娜。

Yeah, that's a hard one.

是的，這是個難題。

I don't want to just end a friendship but it's been level 10 chaos lately.

我不想就這樣結束友誼，但最近已經是10級混亂了。

I know what to do.

我知道該怎麼做。

Behold the decision maker.

看哪，決策人。

As old as time.

像時間一樣古老。

A good old fashioned pros and cons list begin.

一個好的老式的利弊清單開始了。

We've been friends since high school history pro.

我們從高中歷史專業開始就是朋友。

She's really fun to hang out with one on one.

與她一對一相處真的很有趣。

Okay.

好的。

Pro fine.

親身體驗。

Except for when she's in a group setting, she becomes an entirely different person.

除了當她在一個團體環境中時，她就變成了一個完全不同的人。

Especially if there's a guy around.

特別是如果周圍有一個人。

It's like you don't even exist in competitive for attention.

就像你甚至不存在於競爭性的關注中。

Yeah.

是的。

It's also weird that she hooks up all of our friends with these guys who had crushes on her that she just keeps around.

同樣奇怪的是，她把我們所有的朋友都和這些對她有好感的人勾搭在一起，她只是把這些人留在身邊。

Yeah.

是的。

What's with that?

那是什麼？

It's like she wants her friends to date men who have had an affinity for her.

就像她希望她的朋友與那些曾對她有過好感的男人約會。

What do we call that?

我們怎麼稱呼它呢？

Like a need to feel superiority compared to the other women in her life.

就像需要感受到與她生活中的其他女性相比的優越性。

In a sexual space.

在一個性的空間裡。

Internalized misogyny.

內化的厭女症。

Big con big con.

大騙局大騙局。

But she can be very giving.

但她可以很好地奉獻。

Okay, so approach generous but her generosity is based on stealing.

好吧，如此接近慷慨，但她的慷慨是基於偷竊。

Are you saying that because all of her boyfriends have been meant she's stolen from relationships.

你是說，因為她所有的男朋友都是指她從關係中偷來的。

Con stealing.

金光黨偷竊。

No, I'm talking about the international Women's Day gifts.

不，我說的是國際婦女節的禮物。

Oh you mean those customized earrings she gave everyone?

哦，你是說她送給大家的那些定製耳環？

Those were so sweet and thoughtful.

這些是如此甜蜜和周到的。

Yeah, that was my idea.

是的，這是我的想法。

I told her I was gonna do that for you guys and she straight up stole it and did it.

我告訴她我要為你們做這個，她就直接偷著做了。

Oh my God.

哦，我的上帝。

Okay, underlying stealing.

好吧，潛在的偷竊。

But her intentions were good and I was just really upset by it.

但她的意圖是好的，而我只是真的為此感到不安。

Okay, pro well intentioned, right?

好吧，親好意的，對嗎？

I mean, the the path to hell is paved with it.

我的意思是，通往地獄的道路是用它鋪成的。

But what else?

但還有什麼呢？

She has a cult?

她有一個邪教組織？

A cult?

一個邪教？

Yeah, she runs a cult I guess.

是的，她經營著一個邪教組織，我猜。

Okay, well, I really don't know if I should classify that as like a pro or a con because it really does depend on how the cult is utilized.

好吧，我真的不知道我是否應該把它歸類為贊成或反對，因為它確實取決於如何利用邪教。

It's definitely a pro for her and it could be a pro or a con for us, depending on how she wields it.

這對她來說絕對是一個優點，對我們來說可能是一個優點，也可能是一個缺點，這取決於她如何利用它。

Okay, let's call that neutral neutral, right?

好吧，讓我們把這稱為中性的中性，對嗎？

Cult.

邪教。

It's in neither category and then it'll shift based on the cult, collective movements and actions.

它既不屬於這一類，然後會根據邪教、集體運動和行動進行轉變。

I'm also loving a female cult leader and cults are so male dominated and I get it like all cults are technically bad, but feminism means that we should have equal opportunity for evil for women.

我也在愛著一個女邪教領袖，邪教是以男性為主的，我明白了，好像所有的邪教在技術上都是壞的，但女權主義意味著我們應該為女性提供平等的作惡機會。

Absolutely.

絕對的。

You guys, Sorry, I'm really stressed out here, I love her.

你們，對不起，我在這裡真的很緊張，我愛她。

But the friendship isn't nurturing anymore and there's just so many issues piling up that I don't even have clarity on how to feel anymore.

但這段友誼不再是滋養人的了，而且有那麼多問題堆積在一起，我甚至不清楚如何去感受了。

Okay, you know what, let's just say, let's say fuck the pros and cons list.

好吧，你知道嗎，我們就說，讓我們說去他媽的利弊清單。

Right, Okay, let's go back to the brass tacks.

對，好吧，讓我們回到銅板上。

I have one question for you, one question that will assess how much you can trust her, how safe you feel with her and whether or not she should be in your life moving forward and that question is would you trust her alone with your boyfriend?

我有一個問題要問你，一個可以評估你對她的信任程度、你對她的安全感以及她是否應該在你的生活中繼續前進的問題，這個問題就是你會信任她和你的男朋友單獨在一起嗎？

No.

沒有。

Okay.

好的。

Well, well looks like you have your answer.

好吧，好吧，看起來你有你的答案。

If you can't trust her to act with integrity around a partner because she has a problematic nature and the need for male attention and validation then.

如果你不能相信她在伴侶身邊的行為是正直的，因為她有問題的本性，需要男性的關注和確認，那麼。

Yeah, you're right.

是的，你是對的。

I think I'll call her and have a talk with her to end the friendship as much as it pains me to lose her.

我想我會給她打電話，和她談一談，結束這段友誼，儘管失去她讓我很痛苦。

The pain of continuing to have her in my life is so much greater.

繼續讓她出現在我的生活中，其痛苦是如此之大。

Maybe.

也許。

Well maybe maybe you should go first given she's a cult leader, right?

好吧，也許你應該先走，因為她是一個邪教領袖，對嗎？

Yeah.

是的。

You know what they're called to come after you.

你知道他們被稱作是來找你的。

That would definitely shifted into the con category.

這肯定會轉移到金光黨類別。

Yeah, that that's a big con pro.

是的，那是一個很大的缺點。

There could be a reality show.

可以有一個真人秀節目。

That's true.

這倒是真的。

Pro reality show.

專業的真人秀節目。

Reality show like that reality show, but another potential con death.

像那個真人秀節目，但又是一個潛在的騙死。

You could have a murder documentary.

你可以拍攝一部謀殺紀錄片。

If you do die.

如果你真的死了。

If I die, then I could have a murder documentary.

如果我死了，那麼我可能會有一個謀殺紀錄片。

That would be cool.

這將是很酷的。

Oh my God, reality show, Murder dog Infamy Infamy Infamy is a pro infamy could be on netflix.

哦，我的上帝，真人秀節目，殺人狗臭名昭著的臭名昭著是一個專業的臭名昭著可以在netflix。

Oh my God, netflix.

哦，我的上帝，Netflix。

Maybe maybe Daddy netflix.

也許也許是爸爸的Netflix。

Okay, looks like it's pro.

好吧，看起來是親的。

Okay.

好的。

I think we've got a plan.

我想我們已經有了一個計劃。

Made a choice.

做了一個選擇。

I think it's a pro it's a pro, this really helped.

我認為這是一個專業的問題，這是一個專業的問題，這真的很有幫助。

Let's hang out with her.

讓我們和她一起出去玩。

She call her.

她給她打電話。

Okay.

好的。

Yeah, I'm anaconda.

是的，我是巨蟒。

Thank you to the patrons who supported today's video and thank you to better help for sponsoring today's episode.

感謝支持今天視頻的贊助者，感謝更好的幫助贊助今天的節目。

So sometimes we need help navigating life struggles, pinpointing what's interfering with our happiness.

是以，有時我們需要幫助來駕馭生活中的掙扎，準確指出干擾我們幸福的因素。

Or we just want some assistance, creating patterns that help serve our lives more.

或者我們只是想得到一些幫助，創建有助於更多服務於我們生活的模式。

Better help can assess your needs and match you with your own licensed therapist.

更好的幫助可以評估你的需求，併為你匹配你自己的持牌治療師。

I have several friends who use the service now and you can start communicating within 48 hours.

我有幾個朋友現在使用這項服務，你可以在48小時內開始溝通。

Better health has more than 15,000 counselors in their network that otherwise may not be locally available in many areas, you can send a message to your counselor anytime plus schedule a weekly video or phone session.

Better health在其網絡中擁有超過15,000名諮詢師，否則在許多地區可能無法在當地找到，你可以隨時給你的諮詢師發送消息，外加安排每週的視頻或電話會議。

Better help offers more affordable access than traditional online counseling.

與傳統的在線諮詢相比，更好的幫助提供了更實惠的機會。

And they have financial aid.

而且他們有財政援助。

Better help wants you to start living a happier, more fulfilled life today.

更好的幫助希望你今天就開始過上更快樂、更充實的生活。

You can go to better help dot com slash icona.

你可以去更好的幫助點com斜線icona。

That's better.

那就更好了。

H E L p and join over one million people taking charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional.

H E L p並加入超過一百萬人的行列，在有經驗的專業人士的幫助下負責他們的心理健康。