Good. How are you?

I'm doing well, thank you.

Are you ready for Valentine's Day, to do something?

I'm ready. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.

I'm ready, yeah.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Are you one of those guys

who plans it in advance?

Oh, yeah. JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I got it. JIMMY KIMMEL: I do, too.

- Do you? - Yeah, I do.

You know what's funny?

- I've learned my lesson. - Have you?

Yeah.

Learn the hard way?

Yeah, yeah, I have.

Yeah.

Those CVS runs at like 5 o'clock,

and all those sad guys picking out glitter.

I feel bad because somewhere in America

is a man watching right now--

JIMMY KIMMEL: Somewhere.

And he's so full of anxiety because he just now realized

it's Valentine's Day tomorrow. [LAUGHTER]

I'm sorry.

If he's lucky, he realized it now.

I mean, you got to be ready.

So OK, what are you ready with?

What's the plan?

Oh man.

Well, you got to--

OK, here's the deal, guys.

[LAUGHTER]

You gotta go flowers.

JIMMY KIMMEL: For sure.

But the classy move is you've got to go flowers for yourself,

you gotta go flowers for your mom,

and you go flowers for her mom. - Excellent.

That's the move.

And then here [INAUDIBLE]

[LAUGHTER]

I am, you know.

I am the best.

No.

And then, but here's the thing.

You're going to screw this up more than once.

You're going to forget an anniversary.

You're going to forget a Valentine's Day.

So what you do is you set yourself up by periodically

giving just because flowers.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh!

Right, here's a bouquet of flowers just because.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Ah. - You know.

Or just a little-- it doesn't flowers, it can be expensive.

Could be just a little card, a little note.

Learn her love language, and learn to speak it,

and periodically do something.

So then when you inevitably forget she'll go,

oh well, they did that thing in March.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, that's nice.

It's an insurance policy. - It is.

It's insurance.

So now I do this, too, with my mother and my mother-in-law.

I will send them flowers as well.

Clutch.

But I worry sometimes that if my dad forgets to get flowers,

he's doomed because I sent them, and then if, God forbid,

you know, my mother in law's husband

forgets to send flowers, he's in a world

of trouble because of me.

But that's really on him, I guess.

- Yeah. - It's a dog-eat-dog world.

It's a dog-eat-dog world, you know.

On Valentine's day.

You elbow him out.

No, yeah, that's something to think about.

That's something to think about.

This is your first Valentine's Day with your bride

as man and wife. - Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

JIMMY KIMMEL: So you really have to deliver.

[APPLAUSE]

Yeah, I got to deliver.

But I also knew that I was going to be basically working

through this whole weekend, promoting the movie,

and so we celebrated our Valentine's Day last weekend.

- Oh, you did? - Yeah.

Oh, that's good.

That's always better.

Easier to get a dinner reservation,

everything is easier. - Yeah.

Yeah, completely.

But I did get her a little something.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, you did? - Yeah.

JIMMY KIMMEL: For tomorrow? - For tomorrow.

Oh and now the surprise is, I guess, ruined.

Oh, she doesn't watch you.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, she's not watching.

[LAUGHTER]

Secret's safe here.

When do you start shooting "Jurassic World," the next one?

- Very soon. - Very soon.

I'm in it.

[CHEERING]

Yeah, we're gearing up.

We're getting ready to go here very, very--

How do you get ready for that?

You starve.

You starve?

Yeah, yeah.

I have to starve.

Why do you have to starve?

Well, I have to put myself on a really strict code

because I'm 40 now.

So if I eat like, I don't know, a Starburst,

I gain like, 15 pounds.

[LAUGHTER]

Starlord can't eat a Starburst?

I know. No, I know.

We should work on an endorsement.

Wow.

But there's no such thing as dinosaurs anymore.

They make those come out of nowhere.

Can't they do that with your body?

I mean, can't they just CGI you?

Why would you even burden yourself with this?

[LAUGHTER]

You know what I'm saying?

If there could be a team--

Yes, I know what you're saying.

Oh, my God!

You didn't think of that did you?

- Yeah! - Yeah.

Yeah, maybe it's something to talk

to your agent about or Steven Spielberg or something.

For real. Yes.

Or something like that, you know.

They're pumping a lot of money into the thing

I'm not running from.

[LAUGHTER]

Why can't they dial this in, too?

I think they can.

I think we solved a lot of problems--

I think you need a lot of candy tomorrow now.

You just cost Universal a lot of money.

On "Parks and Recreation" were you encouraged

to be pudgy on that show?

Was that-- - Yeah, I was.

Yeah, thank you.

[LAUGHTER]

I was.

Well, I remember, in the first couple of seasons,

just unintentionally, I had gotten a little fat.

And I was watching the episodes, it was like, Oh, God, Chris.

You've really let yourself go.

And then I was like, but this is some of the funniest stuff

you've ever done.

And I went to Mike Schur, our creator, and I said,

I want to gain like another 30, 40 pounds.

And he was like, OK.

[LAUGHTER]

And so I did.

I put on-- yeah, and then it became a challenge.

Everyone wanted to see how much I could eat.

I was constantly-- I remember a scene.

This is funny.

Oh, it's funny.

There was this restaurant in "Parks and Rec"

called the Jurassic Fork.

JIMMY KIMMEL: Right.

Oddly.

And that was where we would go to eat, and they gave us, you

know, dinosaur-sized portions.

And so I didn't have anything to say in the scene,

so inevitably I wanted to try to get some screen time.

So I decided I would eat one rack of ribs per take.