I'm gonna be crowned

[karate yelling]

Woo-yah!

King of Karate!

- Mmm! Hey! - Hey!

- Hey! Hey! - Hey! Hey!

Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Hi-yah!

[yelling]

...yah!

[singing]

[laughing]

- I love this show! - Me too.

[karate yelling]

[karate yelling]

Uh, just a second.

Safety first.

And now, spin technique!

[karate yelling]

Double overhand squirrel knot!

[rumbling]

[crashing]

I'm gonna get ya tomorrow, SpongeBob!

[roaring]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[karate yelling]

[grunting]

[yelling]

[yelling]

[yelling]

[yelling]

Hi-yah!

- Sandy? - Oh, I'm Sandy, alright.

I'm very Sandy. Hi-yah!

Oh, I get it. She's "Sandy."

That's her name; she's also covered in... yes!

Back in Texas, we call ice cream "frozen cow juice."

Excuse me for a sec.

Hi-yah!

- Thank you. - No, no, thank you .

Hi-yah!

Hi-hi-hi-yah!

[karate yelling]

Aw, SpongeBob.

I'm just not feelin' up to karate right now.

Oh, I get it.

Not feeling up to karate, huh?

Whatever you say, Sandy.

Boy, I hope Sandy doesn't attack me from behind.

[growling]

[yelling]

[yelling]

Who is this intruder that fails to attack me?

That's my friend.

SpongeBob SquarePants.

Whoa. What was that stench?

That was what we in karate call

the Smell of Death.

You know kah-rah-tay?

He doesn't just know karate, he is karate.

This here is the legendary karate master, Fuzzy Acorns.

[grunting]

[laughing]

[grunting]

- Wow! - Pretty.

[laughing]

[sighing]

Wait 'til Sandy gets a load

of these adhesive kah-rah-ray gloves.

Hi-yah!

[laughing]

[laughing]

[suctioning]

Hi-yah!

SpongeBob!

What on earth are you doin'?

You mean you sent my best friend

on a dangerous wild goose chase just so you could go shopping?

Excuse us, SpongeBob.

- This is for my tail! - Wait, Sandy,

- Hi-yah! - I was-- whoa!

This is for almost gettin' us killed!

- Hi-yah! - Wait, Sandy!

[grunting]

And this is for my submarine, Matilda!

Ohh.

[babbling]

Ah-yah! Hi-yah!

[yelling]

Today, I'm gonna sneak up and get that Sandy

with a super sneaky karate move!

Woh-ha!

[karate yelling]

[humming "Jingle Bells"]

What diabolical act is she committing now?

[humming "Jingle Bells"]

Fire! Don't worry Sandy, I'm coming!

The first test is simple.

Split a log with one hand chop, like so.

Your turn, Karate Man.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, OK. Mm-hm.

Please proceed.

OK! Prepare to see the split of your life!

Don't worry. I always carry a spare

[hyperventilating]

Oh, no, you don't!

Hoo-hah! Karate slice! Hi-yah!

[munching]

[gong reverberating]

[rumbling]

[shattering]

Oh.

Oh, yeah? Watch this! Ah!

[armpit farting]

I like you, SpongeBob.

Well, we could be tighter than bark on a tree.

Hi-yah!

Uh, I like you, too, Sandy.

Hi-yah!

Hi-yah!

Hi-yah! Yah!

Yah! Yah! Yah! Yah! Yah! Yah! Yah!

Ta-da!

A gift in your likeness.

'Cause you're so sweet.

Get it? 'Cause pineapples are sweet

and you are sweet also as well.

Get it?

[laughing]

[humming]

[piping]

- Hello? - Hi-yah!

Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Nice try, Sponge Brain !

Oh, no. Not muffin the display! Ah!

This just in, a mad man is chopping everything.

Not the giant-screen TVs!

Oh, no!

The suspect is considered fat, pink, and dangerous.

Oh, oh! Gianter TVs! Hi-yah!

Pull it together, buddy!

I'm trying to,

but this thing has a mind of its own!

[grunting]

Yah!

[yelling]

Hi-yah! Hi-yah! Yah!

[crashing]

[grunting]

[squeaking]

Ah!

Oh, silly me.

Hey, Sandy,

have you ever heard the one about the squirrel

and the tin cans?

I don't think so.

Well, it goes like this!

Oh, wait, I forgot the punch line.

Oh, yeah!

[laughing]

That's a good one, isn't it?

You sure you wanna do this, buddy?

Enough talk! If you want your belt,

you're gonna have to tussle it out.

So let the match begin!

Alright, brace yourself, Sandy.

'Cause it is about to get rough and tumble!

OK, SpongeBob! You gotta catch me first!

Woo!

Ack! Oomf! Ah!

[flailing]

[roaring]

Hi-yah!

Ugh, hominy grits!

- Uh-huh. What else you got? - That's it.

That's it? That's the totality of your karate mastery?

Well, Squidward, I've only been studying a couple of years.

But if total karate knowledge is what you seek,

then you should visit Sensei Cheeks.

Hey, I was just gonna say that.

I know.

[laughing]

Uh-oh.

Why you low-down, no good, bottom-dwellin'--

Dadgummit! Come back here!

You wanna see what I'm gonna do to you?

[yelling]

First, I'm gonna do this!

Then, I'm gonna do this!

[grunting]

[hyperventilating]

You dare refuse my barter?

The accept my chop!

Hi-yah!

[slurping]

[shivering]

[shattering]

[yelling]

[crashing]

[growling]

Hey, waiter! An empty plate?

[yelling]

Oh! I forgot the fries!

Now, I see you are a skilled opponent

with a cold-blooded heart of a warrior!

Ah, you little Krabby Patties are so cute.

Mm-hmm.

Something's not right here.

It's the onions. They've gone bad!

[cawing]

[yawning]

[cawing]

Hey, I'm doing it! I am blocking the acorns!

Yee-haw!

I told you all you had to do was know the movements

of every day to master kah-rah-tay.

Ha ha! I can't believe I did it!

Yeah, yeah! Now try this!

OK, OK, hi-yah!

Wow! I did it!

Hi-yah!

I can protect my groceries now!

Hi-yah!

[shattering]