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This Sunday is Mother's day and what better way to honor them
then by reflecting on some of their wonderful word of wisdom
Our mom told us we can be anything we wanted to be.
My mom always told me that the tooth fairy was real.
And I want to be the tooth fairy.
Obviously, that was not possible.
My mom said that I will be a nurse, that was a lie.
My mom said true beauty is on the inside
if you look inside someone, that just gross.
My parents say I couldn't have a dog growing up because they said I wouldn't take care of it,
and who is laughing now? Right, Marley?
My mom always told me that I was her favorite.
Mom told me that I was her favorite
My mother used to tell me that the cross of the bread is the healthiest part.
My mom said that I could anything thing that i want to be
as long as it's a doctor, a lawyer, a violinist, a pianist or karate champion.
My mom said she was an angel when she was my age.
I was born seven months later.
Cracking your knuckles gives you more friends.
There are no dumb questions.
My mom used to tell me not to take picture in groups of three or else the one in the middle will die.
My mom always told me that I have to wait an hour after I eat to swim or otherwise I'm going to drown and die.
But that is mainly because I didn't not know how to swim.
When my grandpa die, my grandma said don't worry, he is in a better place,
I'm pretty sure being dead isn't in a better place.
I had to be in a member of cleaning plate club
I googled it, there is no cleaning plate club.
She told me that like everybody reheat their tortilla chips when they stay in the oven so that they last longer.
If I swallow a chewing gum, it will stand inside my body for seven years,
came out the next day.
My mom used to say that there are starving kids in China that would love to finish my brussels sprout.
No, we don't.
I don't care how hungry you are, nobody wants brussels sprout.
She said that if I swallow watermelon seed that I will grow watermelon seed inside my tummy.
My mom said I can get pregnant from kissing boys.
If you made an ugly face for too long, you will stick that way.
My mom told me if I keep making this face, it will stay like this, and look, I'm fine.
When i was in pre-school one morning, my parents said that it was pajama day,
so I wore my pajamas to pre-school and then it turns out it wasn't pajama day and then I pooped my pants.
My mom said that if I play with fire, I will pee my bed.
She also said if I pee my bed, I will catch on fire.
My mom always told me that if I play more than a hour video games, my eyes will melt.
you stared at the TV for too long, you will go blind.
I just finished playing for six hours and my eyes are still here.
She said if I was drunk in a party and needed a ride home, no question will be asked.
So many questions were asked.
My mom used to tell me drinking coffee stunts your growth, five nine.
I am still really short.
My always told me that the way fish get to heaven is through toilet bowl.
My mom told me that nice girl don't call boys, to this day I still have trouble ordering the pizza.
My mom used to say, your will understand when you have kid of your own.
I still don't understand.
On behalf of all of us who now know the truth, we love you.
My mom says wait 'til your father comes home, he never came home.
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那些媽媽曾對我們說得謊 Lies Your Mother Told You

5676 分類 收藏
Emily Hsieh 發佈於 2014 年 8 月 23 日    Emily Hsieh 翻譯    林曉玉 審核
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