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  • Daniel: All right

  • Today we're gonna be talking about

  • ARE WE A PSYCHOPATH?

  • You guys can actually figure out whether you're psychopath or not

  • By answering a couple of riddles

  • You can determine whether you're psychopath or not

  • By looking at how you answer the questions

  • Hosuh: All right, what is this test?

  • Let's uh... Give it a try

  • D: So there's a-- there's a list of questions that you would have to answer

  • In order to figure out whether you are psychopath or not

  • And just to let you guys know

  • This is-- this is not anything scientific

  • This is just kind of for-funsies-sake

  • So if you do get them right, don't worry about it

  • Right?

  • [Snickering]

  • H: We'll see

  • D: Now, this first one... it's-- it's kind of messed up

  • But it's an easy question

  • Now, there's a little kid

  • And he got presents from Santa Claus

  • He got a soccer ball and he got a bicycle

  • But the kid was not happy

  • Why?

  • Stephen: He could've had more stuff?

  • H: Is this multiple choice?

  • D: No, it's not multiple choice H: Do we get a scantron?

  • H: Oh, so we just say whatever comes to our mind?

  • D: Yeah, you guys just gotta figure it out

  • H: Oh wow

  • S: Yeah no-- the kid wanted more stuff or something else

  • The kid's greedy

  • Kids are greedy

  • D: What about you, Hosuh?

  • H: Umm... He...

  • The kid knows that Santa Claus isn't real

  • And that Santa Claus is his dad

  • D: Okay

  • Well, sorry, both of you guys are wrong

  • Any normal person would say either the kid didn't like the present

  • Or the kid wanted more presents...

  • But a psychopath will say:

  • The kid din't have any legs

  • S: WHAT?

  • D: Interesting

  • S: WHAT?

  • H, snickering: This is so dark

  • S: That was so out of left field, Daniel?!

  • D: All right, next question! [Hosuh still snickering in the background]

  • D: One night, a man goes out because he is thirsty and has to drink some water

  • After he finishes drinking water, he looks to the right and he sees a robber

  • Now, this man runs away and goes and hides in the closet

  • Now, if you were the robber that saw this

  • And you had a knife in your hand

  • What would you do?

  • S: Depends what I'm stealing

  • If I'm stealing something valuable - no witnesses

  • D: Yes, but what would you do? Tell me what you would do

  • S: I would pretend like I'm walking away

  • I would open the front door, close the front door

  • Let him come out, stab him when he comes out

  • Easy, no witnesses

  • D: What would you do, Hosuh?

  • I'd just get the hell out of their house

  • Someone saw me, let's get out

  • D: Oh wow, Stephen, you actually got that question right [Cheering sfx]

  • S: Good D: So, normal person would say:

  • They would open the closet and kill them or they would just run away

  • But a psychopath will say they will wait quietly

  • S: Oh shit, really?! Oh my god D: Until that person comes out and then kill them

  • H: Wow

  • S: Oh shit, I was actually saying that

  • Oh my God, okay

  • D, afraid: So, uh... Stephen, about that party next week

  • I don't think you should come

  • [Laughing]

  • D: Don't worry, I won't bring a knife

  • Knives are too informal

  • D: All right, question number 3

  • You're living in an apartment

  • You are on the 5th floor and you are just...

  • You're tired but you decide to look out the window

  • And... When you looked out the window, you witnessed a man being murdered by another man

  • But then that man saw you, too

  • And then instantly that man pointed a finger at you

  • And moved that finger

  • Up and down, up and down a couple of times

  • Now, what did that mean?

  • H: So... The man who killed him, kill-- killed the other man, saw me and then pointed at me

  • And then moved his fingers up and down and up and down

  • S: That means he's coming for me next

  • He saw the-- he saw me see the murder

  • No witnesses

  • H: But why up and down and up and down?

  • There's got to be a reason for this

  • 'Cause you would usually go left and right and left and right

  • Or place two fingers on your eyes and then on them

  • As "I'm looking at you, I'll be watching" or something like that

  • You know what I mean?

  • Why up and down and up and down?

  • Hm...

  • D: Well, you guys are out of time

  • The answer is...

  • [Snickering]

  • The psychopath is actually counting the floors

  • D: So which floor are you living in H: Holy shit!

  • H: That's-- that's creepy D: Yeah, any--

  • S: Oh wait, oh that's what you mean?

  • D: Now, a normal person will say:

  • "Oh, he's pointing at you, like, oh it's a-- it's a threat"

  • But a psychopath will answer "Oh, the guy is counting the stairs"

  • S: Oh...

  • That makes sense though

  • I was confused as to what the question was asking, but... yeah

  • Next, next

  • D: Next question!

  • You are a girl and you're at your aunts' funeral

  • And you are mourning and then you see, right next to you, a really handsome man

  • Tha you fall in love with instantly

  • The man is wearing all black and he has a black hair

  • The next night, you kill your sister

  • Now, why did you kill her?

  • S: So you can see him again at her funeral

  • D: Stephen got it right! (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ [Cheering sfx]

  • D: Yup, Stephen, I think you might be a psychopath

  • S: Oh my god... D: So, a normal person says:

  • "Oh, um, because that girl might be dating that handsome man"

  • Or "That handsome man might like the girl."

  • But the psychopath will say

  • "I will kill the girl so that there'll be another funeral to see that man"

  • S: Yeah...

  • D: Wow, um, okay...

  • D: That's kind of... You're messed up S: That's really weird

  • H: Stephen, are you okay?

  • D: Stephen...

  • S: I'm great!

  • S: I'm great, Hosuh! Where do you live?

  • I'm great! ʘ‿ʘ

  • H, over the horizon: You can come over here

  • All the way in Montreal

  • D: Oh man, Stephen

  • All right, next question

  • Now, this one is a multiple choice

  • S: Okay

  • D: I need you guys to close your eyes and imagine this with me

  • H: Okay

  • D: You're in this forest and it's super dark, all right?

  • And you're walking through the forest and you feel something's behing your back

  • And so you turn around as fast as you can

  • What do you see?

  • One:

  • The opposite sex

  • Two:

  • Nothing

  • Three:

  • A ghost

  • Four:

  • A wild animal

  • Five:

  • A dog

  • H: Nothing

  • S: I'm pretty sure the answer to psychopath is a girl

  • Or like the opposite sex

  • D: Both of you guys are normal human beings

  • The answer is:

  • A dog

  • S: Why?

  • D: I actually don't know the specific reason

  • But John Hopkins, professor of, I think...

  • Harvard?

  • Did this-- did this psychological test where psychopaths has the highest chance of picking dogs

  • S: Well, I mean like, I guess a member of the opposite sex is a human being

  • So, regular people interact with human beings, so it's probably not that one

  • Nothing - because you're not crazy

  • Ghost isn't a real thing so it's not really tangible

  • And wild animal is unfamiliar

  • And it's not a human companion

  • So that's probably why it's gonna be a dog

  • H: But why don't normal people choose it?

  • D: Cuz normal people are scared of the opposite sex, wild animals, nothing and ghosts

  • H: You're scared of the opposite sex?

  • D: I don't know

  • S: No proof. We are speculating

  • H: Okay

  • D: All right, last question, guys

  • Stephen, if you get this right, I swear I don't think we can be friends

  • [Laughing]

  • So this murderer decides to stab another man

  • And he stabbed him five times

  • And after stabbing him five times, he left the elevator

  • Since this elevator had windows everywhere, you can actually see inside the elevator

  • And this murderer just kept on watching the elevator

  • Why?

  • H: So you said the elevator had windows, right?

  • D: Mhm •◡•

  • H: But... It could also be an elevator that is made out of glass

  • And it's a mall elevator

  • And since, if someone had died in the elevator, everyone else would be watching

  • So, the man who killed the guy, if he wasn't watching

  • That would kind of stand out

  • If he was the only one who wasn't watching

  • S: Yeah, I know, I get what Hosuh is trying to say

  • H: So, he watched the person bleeding to death inside the elevator, just as any other mall customer would do

  • D: Correct!

  • He did not flee the scene because it would've been awkward to find anyone walking away

  • From that kind of horrid scene

  • Good job guys!

  • I mean, you guys didn't get all of it right

  • But, Hosuh, you're a normal person

  • Stephen...

  • I love you and I care about you [Snickering in the background]

  • [Laughing]

  • S: Okay

  • D: All right

  • Also

  • It's important to just remind everyone that this is just a simple test

  • It has nothing to do with real science

  • It's...

  • One of these fun pseudo-science questions that if you do get right

  • You're probably smarter than the rest of us but...

  • You know, it's just a quiz man, don't worry about it

  • S: Don't worry, sometimes the voices in your head are your best friends

  • DANIEL

  • HOSUH

  • ANDREW

  • Quack •◡•

Daniel: All right

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A2 初級 美國腔

By the way, Are You a Psychopath?

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    nao 發佈於 2021 年 07 月 02 日
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