'cause you tend to be more a story teller, long form.

因為你更傾向於講故事，長篇大論。

You take your time.

你慢慢來

And these are all compliments.

而這些都是恭維。

You're not just calling me lazy.

你不只是說我懶。

(both laughing)

（兩個笑）

Yeah, take your time.

是啊，慢慢來

Tell these stories.

告訴這些故事。

He's always got an excuse.

他總是有一個藉口。

You're more of a marathoner and I'm going hey,

你更像是一個馬拉松運動員，而我卻要嘿。

I've got this 50-yard dash I want you to run.

我想讓你跑50碼的短跑

Yeah, and also you're the first person

是啊，而且你是第一個人。

to ever call me a racer of any kind.

曾經叫我一個賽車手的任何形式。

(lively music)

(活潑的音樂)

[JP] A lot of work goes into a short

[JP]很多工作要在一個短的時間內完成

late-night stand up set.

深夜站立集。

Join me, JP Buck, as I spotlight the comedians

和我一起，JP Buck，我將聚焦喜劇人

who came up with some of my favorite Conan sets.

誰想出了一些我最喜歡的柯南套裝。

This is The Set Up.

這就是 "設置"。

[Conan] Please welcome back to our show,

歡迎回到我們的節目中來

very funny guy Shane Torres.

非常有趣的傢伙Shane Torres。

Let's talk about this Guy Fieri set.

讓我們來談談這套Guy Fieri套餐。

How does this thought come to you?

你怎麼會有這種想法？

I always wanted to tell jokes

我一直想講笑話

that nobody else could tell, right?

沒有人可以告訴，對不對？

Like, meaning they were mine.

就像，意思是他們是我的。

That's him, it sounds like him right away.

就是他，聽起來就像他。

One of the things I would always see people doing

我總是看到人們在做的一件事。

as far as subject matter goes was just be like,

至於題材就是要像。

the easiest way to say something is shitty

俗話說得好："說得好聽點就是爛貨

is it's like Guy Fieri blah, blah, blah.

是它像Guy Fieri blah，blah，blah。

It was something I saw people doing forever.

這是我看到人們永遠在做的事情。

And really I thought it was

而我真的認為這是

kind of a dumb way to pack a parachute.

一種愚蠢的方式來包裝一個降落傘。

It just was unimaginative to me

對我來說，它只是沒有想象力而已

and not really well researched

而不是真正的研究

and just very much in my mind a bit lazy

只是在我看來，非常多的有點懶惰

when I would see it a bunch.

當我會看到它的一堆。

Not even to say it doesn't work,

甚至可以說沒有用。

but it wasn't something I found terribly exciting.

但這不是我覺得非常興奮的事情。

It was like top 40 radio to me.

對我來說，這就像前40名的電臺。

So I kinda thought, well what's different?

所以我有點想，好吧，有什麼不一樣？

Just think about it for a second,

想一想就知道了。

'cause it's also the opinion everybody held about him.

因為這也是大家對他的看法。

At the time was just unanimous that he sucked, you know?

當時只是一致認為他很爛，你知道嗎？

And I was like, maybe he doesn't.

我當時想，也許他沒有。

Well, let's find out.

好吧，讓我們來看看。

It started with the very opening line of the joke,

這是從笑話的開頭一句話開始的。

that's the one thing that didn't

那是唯一沒有的事

really change ever that much.

真的改變過那麼多。

Can someone please explain to me

誰能給我解釋一下？

what the hell Guy Fieri ever did to anyone?

Guy Fieri到底對誰做過什麼?

The first time I did it

我第一次做的時候

I did it at Whiplash on the West Side of Manhattan

我在曼哈頓西區的 "鞭子 "做的。

and it got a huge pop.

並獲得了巨大的爆款。

I remember it being, oh this is a good joke

我記得它是，哦，這是一個很好的笑話，

because I had to follow Judd Apatow.

因為我必須跟著賈德-阿帕圖。

(both laughing) So I was like, well if I'm keeping up

（兩個笑） 所以，我當時想，好吧，如果我跟上

with the kind of Hollywood, I'm doing all right.

與好萊塢的那種，我做的一切權利。

(lively music)

(活潑的音樂)

It would be hard to do a bit like this,

要做到這樣的一點就很難了。

say back in like the '80s before social media,

說回到像80年代之前的社交媒體。

before this sort of uniformity of thought

在這種思想統一之前

of where people are sort of just the hive mind

在那裡，人們是那種只是蜂巢的思想

of like, oh that guy hates it?

的喜歡，哦，那傢伙討厭它？

Yeah, I'm on board with that.

是的，我同意。

Yeah, it just kinda became negativity

是啊，它只是有點變成了負面情緒

was just an opinion on him, but it wasn't informed.

只是對他的看法，但並不瞭解情況。

And it's kind of a way people are in general,

而這也是一般人的一種方式。

just like, ah that person sucks, this sucks, that sucks.

就像，啊那個人很爛，這個很爛，那個很爛。

And there was never okay, sure.

而且從來沒有還好，肯定。

I understand how to react to something

我明白如何對一些事情做出反應

when you don't like it,

當你不喜歡它。

but I also think you should still explain it.

但我也覺得你還是應該解釋一下。

Also, how often do you need

另外，你多久需要

to hate someone like Guy Fieri?

討厭像Guy Fieri這樣的人?

Really, is he ever in your house,

真的，他曾經在你的房子。

is he in your place of work,

是他在你的工作地點。

are you interacting with him?

你在和他交流嗎？

Why carry around that?

為什麼要帶著這個？

And then there was a guy I met,

然後有一個人我遇到了。

and I thought this was actually very interesting.

我覺得這其實是非常有趣的。

You don't even know you do it,

你甚至不知道自己在做什麼。

but a guy in Austin, I think his name is Brendan K O'Grady,

但在奧斯汀的一個傢伙，我想他的名字是布倫丹K O'Grady。

and he goes, hey that bit's great,

他去，嘿，位的偉大。

and just so you know, I make fun of him,

只是讓你知道，我取笑他。

but the very first thing I do whenever I'm on the road

但每當我在路上的時候，我做的第一件事就是

is see if Guy Fieri's been to a restaurant there.

是看看Guy Fieri是否去過那裡的餐廳。

(both laughing)

（兩個笑）

What I love also

我也喜歡

is you come right out of the box

是你從盒子裡出來的

delivering that first line.

提供第一條線。

You're not worrying about an opener.

你不擔心開瓶器。

You're not trying to do how's everybody.

你不是想做如何的人。

I don't know if you remember this, we talked about it.

不知道你還記不記得，我們談過這個問題。

You called me and were like hey,

你打電話給我，像嘿。

I love the bit and I think it's gonna do great,

我喜歡這個位子，我想它會做得很好。

but it is all one bit.

但這都是一個位。

So just so you know, if they don't like it, you can't-

所以你要知道，如果他們不喜歡，你不能... ...

it's not The Cellar at 1:30.

1點半的時候不是 "酒窖"。

You can't pivot out of it.

你不可能從這裡轉出。

(JP laughing) You can't be like where was he going

你不會是要去哪裡吧？

with that Guy Fieri thing and then two minutes later

與蓋伊-菲力的事情，然後兩分鐘後，

it's all everything bagels or whatever.

它的一切百吉餅或什麼的。

So I did think maybe I should just give them

所以我想也許我應該給他們...

one very soft thing, just to get them, hey real quick.

一個很軟的東西，只是為了讓他們，嘿嘿真快。

But then I was kinda like, ah (beep) it.

但後來我就有點想，啊（嘟）了。

It's a little more fun to just be excited

興奮就好了，更有意思了

and see how it goes.

看看它是如何去。

(lively music)

(活潑的音樂)

Can someone please explain to me

誰能給我解釋一下？

what the hell Guy Fieri ever did to anyone?

Guy Fieri到底對誰做過什麼?

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

Y'all know who I'm talking about, the celebrity chef?

你們都知道我說的是誰，那個名廚？

People shit on that dude all the time

人們一直在罵那個傢伙

and as far as I can tell

據我所知

all he ever did was follow his dreams.

他所做的一切都是為了追尋他的夢想。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

You understand, people are horrible

你明白的，人是很可怕的

to a television personality

對電視人

and he didn't do anything wrong.

他沒有做錯任何事情。

Here's what he did do, America.

這是他做的事，美國。

The audiences sometimes at late night sets

觀眾有時在深夜的演出中

in studios can be a little tight.

在演播室裡可能有點緊。

Yeah.

是啊。

And that line, I've seen every time gets a huge pop,

而這句話，我每次看到都會有很大的彈幕。

and deservedly so. Every once in a while we get audience,

而且當之無愧。偶爾我們也會有觀眾。

they're not as great as other audiences.

他們不像其他觀眾那樣偉大。

That happens everywhere.

這種情況到處都有。

Yeah, they're kinda leaning in going,

是啊，他們還挺傾向於去。

okay where are you going with this?

好吧，你要去哪裡 與此？

You know, when you're doing these big sets,

你知道，當你在做這些大的套路時。

I'm sure everyone's told you this,

我相信大家都跟你說過了。

but you're like, oh my first little thing

但你就像，哦，我的第一個小東西，

didn't get the thing, didn't get what I expect of it.

沒有得到這個東西，沒有得到我所期望的東西。

And you're like ah (beep).

你就像啊（嗶）。

God, I feel like I've been up here an hour already.

天啊，我感覺我已經在這裡呆了一個小時了。

(both laughing)

（兩個笑）

And you're like 20 seconds in.

而你就像20秒。

I'm such a (beep) tin man armor kinda guy,

我就是這樣一個（嗶）鐵皮人盔甲挺多的人。

'cause I remember thinking it would just get this loud pop

"因為我記得我以為它只是會得到這個響亮的流行音樂

and then I was just gonna rev in

然後，我只是要去轉速

and hit them for four and a half minutes

並打了他們四分半鐘

or whatever it is, you know?

或者不管它是什麼，你知道嗎？

And I then I remember it feeling,

而我呢，我記得它的感覺。

good, like it worked,

很好，就像它的工作。

but it wasn't what I was expecting.

但這不是我所期望的。

And then I remember I kinda felt like

然後，我記得我有點感覺像

I was moving a little faster.

我走得比較快。

You've got them already,

你已經得到了他們。

but I can definitely tell you've got

但我可以肯定地說，你已經得到了

a little bit of a task ahead of you,

有點任務在前。

of going okay, this group of people

的去還好，這群人

needs a little softening up.

需要一點點軟化。

He started a company where he hires everybody,

他開了一家公司，在那裡他僱傭了所有人。

he pays more than minimum wage,

他付的錢比最低工資還多。

he gives health benefits before he has to,

他給了健康福利，才不得不。

he has a non-profit where he gives pretzel making machines

他有一個非營利性的地方，他給椒鹽捲餅製造機。

to schools so they can fundraise.

到學校，以便他們能夠籌集資金。

I know that one sounds like I made it up,

我知道這個聽起來像是我編的。

but I swear to Christ it's true.

但我向上帝發誓，這是真的。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

You also have phrases that work really well,

你還有一些短語，非常好用。

that are purely yours.

純粹是你的。

I swear to Christ.

我向上帝發誓

In other words, I don't write jokes well,

換句話說，我的笑話寫得不好。

so I have to figure out a way to say things that are funny.

所以我必須想辦法說一些有趣的事情。

I would not agree with that.

我不同意這種說法。

I don't write them like punch liney,

我寫得不像衝鋒陷陣。

like someone who is great,

喜歡一個人誰是偉大的。

but I'm not like him at all, Sam Morril.

但我一點也不像他，薩姆・莫瑞爾。

His act is very punchy and very dense.

他的表演非常有衝擊力，非常密集。

I think I have to just be like here I am,

我想我必須要像這裡的我一樣。

this dumb country rube with all these weird sayings

這個愚蠢的鄉下人有很多奇怪的說法

or whatever.

或什麼的。

(both laughing)

（兩個笑）

I like writing that way.

我喜歡這樣寫。

It's a fun way to be creative

這是一種有趣的創意方式

and not take an easy way out and just say,

而不是採取簡單的方式，只說。

it's the craziest thing ever.

這是最瘋狂的事情了。

You know, that's kinda lazy writing.

你知道嗎，這樣寫還挺懶的。

So it's funner to embody a good turn of phrase, if you will.

所以，如果你願意的話，體現一個好的轉捩點是比較有趣的。

He works with Special Olympics athletes

他與特奧會運動員一起工作

and if you need a little more sugar with this medicine,

以及如果你需要多加一點糖與此藥。

he also officiated a gay wedding.

他還主持了一場同志婚禮。

Yeah, but because he has flames on his shirt

是啊，但因為他的襯衫上有火焰。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

everybody shits all over this dude

每個人都在這傢伙身上拉屎

like he's a member of Nickelback.

就像他是Nickelback的成員。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

And by the way, what the hell did Nickelback ever do?

對了，Nickelback到底做了什麼？

(audience clapping)

（觀眾鼓掌）

They made 40 million bros happy?

他們讓4000萬兄弟高興了？

Yeah, you don't want them walking around pissed off.

是啊，你不希望他們走來走去生氣。

That's how we ended up in this mess.

所以我們才會落得如此狼狽。

The Nickelback thing, did that start out

Nickelback的事情，是一開始

as just a line and suddenly you were like,

作為只是一條線，突然你就像。

oh wait, I can actually mine this a little more for a joke?

哦，等等，其實我可以挖掘這一點更多的笑話？

It started out as an is like joke,

開始是一個是喜歡開玩笑。

which is not a thing I'm a huge fan of,

這不是一個東西我很喜歡。

but I think you can take them further.

但我認為你可以把他們進一步。

It's just the first step up the stairs.

這只是上樓的第一步。

But I said it, and I was like that's good, it'll work.

但我說了，我當時就想這很好，會有用的。

It's another thing people dog for no reason.

這又是一件讓人無緣無故狗血的事情。

I didn't research.

我沒有研究。

They're not researched in the bit the way Guy Fieri is.

他們不像Guy Fieri那樣有研究的位。

(JP laughing)

（JP笑）

So they may actually be horrible people.

所以他們可能真的是可怕的人。

Yeah, they might be, but I saw somebody write,

是啊，他們可能是，但我看到有人寫。

I think, about that guy from Nickelback,

我想，關於Nickelback的那個傢伙。

like he's a genius because he knows

就像他是一個天才，因為他知道。

exactly what people want and that's what he gives them.

正是人們想要的，而他也給了他們什麼。

And I was like, hey man that's a (beep) very good point.

我當時就想，嘿，夥計，這是個（嗶）非常好的觀點。

I think I read it on Consequence of Sound

我想我是在 "聲音的後果 "上看到的。

or something like that.

或類似的東西。

I was like, I wish I could credit whoever wrote it,

我當時就想，我希望我可以把它歸功於誰寫的。

but it's like yeah, that's true.

但它像 是啊，這是真的。

It's just right there.

它就在那裡。

That's what they want.

這就是他們想要的。

They want to rock just enough.

他們想要的是足夠的搖滾。

(JP laughing) And he gives it to them every time.

他每次都會給他們。

Nobody gives anybody a seven out of 10

沒有人給任何人7分，10分

like Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.

像Nickelback的Chad Kroeger

(both laughing)

（兩個笑）

And look, I get it.

你看，我明白了。

I don't want to hang out with Guy Fieri either, okay?

我也不想和Guy Fieri混在一起，好嗎？

I know he looks like a Hot Topic manager

我知道他看起來像個熱門話題經理

moonlighting at a Friday's.

在星期五的兼職。

But he didn't do anything wrong.

但他並沒有做錯什麼。

Well, what else has he done, Shane?

那麼，他還做了什麼，肖恩？

I'm so glad you asked.

我很高興你問了。

He goes around the country to small businesses

他到全國各地去找小企業

and gives them free advertising

並給他們提供免費的廣告

on a national platform on a weekly basis,

在國家平臺上，每週一次。

advertising those small businesses

廣告那些小企業

could never afford themselves with his own television show.

自己的電視節目，自己永遠也負擔不起。

But because his hair looks like he was electrocuted

但因為他的頭髮看起來像被電擊過一樣

while drinking Mountain Dew

邊喝山露水邊

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

people act like we need to saw his head off

人們的行為就像我們需要鋸掉他的頭。

and put it on the internet.

並把它放在互聯網上。

It does feel like you're involving the audience.

這確實讓人感覺你在讓觀眾參與其中。

And even there in that set,

甚至在那一套。

you do play the audience.

你確實在扮演觀眾。

What else did he do, Shane?

他還做了什麼，肖恩？

You ask the question on their behalf,