中級 美國腔 601106 分類 收藏
開始影片後,點擊或框選字幕可以立即查詢單字
字庫載入中…
回報字幕錯誤
What's up everyone it's your girl, superwoman!
'Girls on period,' possibly the most requested video of all time right after 'take your top off'
Well, you're in luck!
I do not think so.
Now if this video is a tampon or pad commercial, it will go something like this
"It's that amazing time of the month again. When my soul and femininity is pouring out from in between my legs into a beautiful Lotus Tampon."
But I'm superwoman, and I keep it real. So allow me to say, there is blood constantly pouring out of us for 5 f-ing days!
It's like a game of God of War down there.
So fellas, let me teach you about girls on their periods, because most of you are clueless.
And I'm gonna try my best to make this as pleasant as possible for you.
But to be honest if you can't handle a little McNasty, then take your Mickey D and close the box.
If you're still here, congratulations! If not, typical, typical men.
What? Things got messy, things got hard, and you just went running to that X?
Story time! Once upon a time, a guy asked me if girls use bandages when on their period.
Yes! Yes, we do use bandages when on our period, but only SpongeBob bandages.
It makes sense, you know. He's a sponge.
Should I smack you? Or maybe the frigging bandage was made for Godzilla? Like, WT, do you use Ziploc bags as condoms?
What kind of question is that? Don't be stupid.
Girls either use tampons and pads, and for all you guys that go, pads, they're like diapers, haha.
Don't laugh. That's not funny, because they are.
Pads are uncomfortable, and they are irritating as F.
And just like a child in an Indian family, if they're not straight, they cause a mess.
Tampons are a little different.
If you're an Indian girl, you've been taught since birth not to use tampons, because apparently, tampons make you a slut.
Uh, hello, how dare you stick anything in that area? Don't you not reserve for a complete stranger on your arranged marriage wedding day?
DUH~ And yes this is no secret that when girls are on their period, they are emotional, roller coaster.
We're not stupid, we know this. Hormone are just all over this F-ing place.
And baby I promise, baby, I know it's frustrating, but believe me it's frustrating for us, too.
We cry for no reason sometimes, we get mad, we get sad, we get happy, we get glad.
Like I swear to you, emoticons, were created by women on their periods.
I mean who else would think of this many F-ed emotions? This right here, cramps. Want a chocolate bar. I'm so in love.
What's happening to me?
And we will never get used to our periods. I'm 23 years old and even till this day, I get shocked as F when I get my period.
I'm in some next level denial. Ohhh. Don't worry, don't worry, it's alright. I probably cut myself. I probably cut myself.
Yeah, don't worry. No, it's fine. I'm fine! It's fine! Nothing is wrong. Ok. Let's go swimming. Where's my wet pants?
It is exhausting every month. Carry pads and tampons everywhere you go.
Are you going on vacation? F, checking your work schedule, check your period schedule.
Cuz you better make sure you ain't bring your own ocean onto the cruise ship.
Cramps, chest pain, back pain, bloating, nausea.
It's like a Pepto Bismol commercial from hell.
Cramps. Back pain. Chest pain. Bloating. Nausea. And every emotion. It's so many.
So many emotions.
And water guns? Who needs water guns when you're on your period? Just stand still and sneeze. hachu..
And here's a fun fact, girl's period do not flow when they're in water.
And if you're a girl and for some reason you didn't know that. A, what the F. And B, grab a hose and like a lab coat. Experiment, girl friends.
So in the shower, we are fan-friggin-tastic. Hot shower, relaxation all upon the ovaries. Singing a song. Do a little dance.
But the second that water stops, let's just say that the reality show ain't got nothing on that amazing race.
The race to dry yourself and get a pad or tampon back on before your period start Niagara Fall-ing everywhere.
It is stressful. You need a game plan before you turn that water off.
Ok, turn that water off. Ok, towel, here we go. Arms, arms, face. Ok. There's no time for the back, no time.
Legs ok here we go. (che-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke) Ok, on.
You look at your white towel. It looks like the effing Japan flag.
Also know that it's ok for us to say we're crazy, but you, hi, you can never say that to us.
In fact, don't ever base any of our action or behavior on the assumption that we are on our period.
unless you physically see me opening a pad. Don't just assume because I'm angry, I'm on my period.
Because that issue is annoying, and tonight, when you're sleeping, I'll just assume you're dead and bury you in the backyard.
Lastly, at least once in your life, a girl will ask a guy to buy her pads or tampons from the store.
It is extremely attractive for that guy to agree and buy her a little pads and tampons, because it shows that you care about feminine needs.
And as much as you don't want to be seen in public buying pads and tampons, just think about it.
Her period only lasts 5-7 days. You still have the rest of the month...to be on her good side.
And yeah, that's pretty much it. This is not me complaining that girls get their period, feel sorry for us, I'm not down for that.
but I'm just letting you know, yeah, we get crazy, we get delusional, and we are emotional roller coaster. Can't you just accept it and move on?
Sor-ry?
And hey if you like this video, I make video every Monday and Thursday. Make sure you click that subscribe button, and rate, comment, and click the link in the description to share this video,
because, hey, sharing, what's up, that's my answer, that's my justification, sharing, what's up. Subscribe, what's up?
And hope you have a beautiful day because you're beautiful. And I love you so much. Muhauh, muhauh, from my heart and my soul.
Hope you have a wonderful day, afternoon, evening, morning, whatever, what else. One love, superwoman, that's a rap period.
    您必須登入才有此功能
提示:點選文章或是影片下面的字幕單字,可以直接快速翻譯喔!

載入中…

載入中…

男女都該知道的-月經真相(Girls on periods)

601106 分類 收藏
Tong-Ann Sytwu 發佈於 2014 年 7 月 9 日   Tong-Ann Sytwu 翻譯   Vicky 審核

影片學習單字重點

loading

影片討論

載入中…
  1. 1. 單字查詢佳句收藏

    選取單字或佳句,可即時查詢字典及收藏!

  2. 2. 單句重複播放

    可重複聽取一句單句,加強聽力!

  3. 3. 使用快速鍵

    使用影片快速鍵,讓學習更有效率!

  4. 4. 關閉語言字幕

    進階版練習可關閉字幕純聽英文哦!

  5. 5. 內嵌播放器

    可以將英文字幕學習播放器內嵌到部落格等地方喔

  6. 6. 展開播放器

    可隱藏右方全文及字典欄位,觀看影片更舒適!

  1. 英文聽力測驗

    挑戰字幕英文聽力測驗!

  1. 點擊展開筆記本讓你看的更舒服

  1. UrbanDictionary 俚語字典整合查詢。一般字典查詢不到你滿意的解譯,不妨使用「俚語字典」,或許會讓你有滿意的答案喔