because I want to go to Homecoming with Brandon Swain.

I really can't wait to see you.

I'm definitely coming home for fall break.

I don't trust you,

and I never will trust you.

You have Farrah lite over there,

so why don't you go hang out with her?

Today I identify as a woman.

He's afraid.

You cannot post those photos.

How are we supposed to help her

if she never asks for it?

You act like this is new.

I know, but it's getting worse.

Look, I know Cowher wouldn't post those photos of his own mother,

and obviously you didn't,

which means that your new partner has gone rogue.

[Farrah] How do you have time for official school business

with all this aggressive posting?

These posts aren't gonna lead to

an actual working partnership.

-I say we expose him. -That would expose us.

-Who cares? -I care... a lot.

[indistinct chatter]

-Thank you so much. -Mm-hmm.

Hey, is your mom gonna come

to the pre-party again like last year?

-I literally forbid her. -Why, what happened?

Oh, she walked around the school parking lot

with a camera and a mic asking everyone,

-"Who are you wearing?" -No, she didn't.

Yeah, her and another mom have this YouTube channel

called "Around the Town with Andrea and Joyce."

It's beyond mortifying.

So, did you guys buy your tickets yet?

Well, my date bought mine. You might've heard of him.

[Farrah and Hurley] Brandon Swain.

You are such a loser.

-I know! -[chuckles]

I bought myself one because I know

nobody in this school's going to ask me.

Oh, because they're scared to.

I mean, look at you.

Hmm. Did you ask anyone yet?

I probably will.

You know that means you're gonna have to buy a ticket

-from one of the Graceys. -Mm.

-[phone vibrating] - [Farrah] When I was little,

my dad and I would spend hours

building these crazy domino mazes in our basement.

[phones buzzing and chiming]

I always remember crying when it came to

pushing over that first domino.

I could never do it.

[phones buzzing]

-Oh, no. -Holy shit.

[Farrah] So my dad would always have to be the one

-to give it a nudge. -[phones buzzing]

Dude, it's cool if you're gay.

I'm not... [chuckles]

I'm not gay.

I'm-- I'm not gay!

Hey!

Tripp!

Tripp!

Wait!

-Tripp! -What?

What do you wanna tell me?

That everything's gonna be okay?

Is that what you wanna tell me?

'Cause it's not.

That post violates me in so many ways.

I know. I get it.

No, you don't! You don't get it!

What do you care? We're not friends.

We don't have to be friends

for me to give a shit.

[scoffs] Look...

I get to decide things

that happen to me on my own time...

and it's not up to some anonymous kid

to push me into something before I'm ready for it, okay?

This can't happen to me right now.

Tripp!

[car engine starts]

[tires screeching]

Hey.

[sighs] I can't believe

The Crotch would post something like that.

It is by far the worst thing The Crotch has ever posted.

They're screwing with a kid's life here.

What do you think, Farrah?

It's indefensible.

[theme song playing]

♪ In a manner of speaking ♪

♪ I don't think we'll be speaking ♪

♪ At all ♪

[drumline music]

Did I get called to the principal's office

because I did something wrong?

Or is this mother-son stuff?

Combo platter.

I thought we agreed not to mix

the two things, especially--

We did, and I have never

asked you to be anything more than

just another student in this school.

But now I need help from my son

who also happens to be a student.

Okay, what do you need?

I need to find The Crotch.

You've already asked me if I know who it is

like a thousand times.

I know, but you are more

of a watcher than a doer,

so I thought maybe, you know,

you've seen things that other people haven't.

I haven't seen anything, Mom.

Okay, then help me find him.

How?

I know how you are around people,

so I wouldn't ask you this

if it wasn't really important.

But can you just dig around the school a little?

Maybe talk to some people,

see what's happening?

You're asking me to be a mole?

No, I'm not asking you to be a mole.

I'm just asking you to dig around a little and see...

Yeah, yeah. Mole, I guess, would be more accurate.

Whatever you think about Tripp,

he doesn't deserve his personal life

exposed like that, and neither did we.

The Crotch has no moral compass.

Colin, please help me.

-Okay. -Thanks.

-What's in the bag? -Supplies.

We are not leaving Cowher's trailer until we have a plan.

You know, it'll take me a little bit of time, but I could probably build

a security system that'll lock him out.

-[Cowher scoffs] -Of course,

that'll just piss him off.

-And then he exposes us. -Or worse.

And the fact this kid's a psycho

creates the same problem with every plan.

No, the only clean way out is to find something

on Dipankar that's worse than what he has on us.

So to get out you have to become a worse psycho?

That sounds promising.

It's not the only way, okay?

Wh-- Why don't we just let him have The Crotch?

I mean, what are we fighting for anyway?

Hot indexes and school gossip?

No, at this point it's so much more than that.

He broke you and Hannah up,

posted those photos of your mom,

and now the Tripp thing? This kid has no conscience,

and he has access to every computer in school.

Who knows how he's gonna escalate this.

Whether it's him or us, it's only a matter of time

before The Crotch blows up in our faces.

Too many people know about us now to stay hidden.

-No offense. -No, I get it.

I already wish I didn't know about all this.

No, I'm not gonna let it blow up in our face.

We can fix this.

Oh, nice speaker. Did Q make you that?

Quartermaster? Makes the gear for James Bond.

What, not a fan?

If you wanna try to fix it, go ahead, okay?

I'm tired of sneaking around and hiding.

-Cowher. -No, I'm serious.

I'm out.

Now what?

With or without Cowher, the plan is still the same.

We need to find something that threatens Dipankar.

Look, I know this is a big ask,

but this is the drive with all The Crotch files on it

since it became a thing.

It's a lot, and I haven't even seen all of it,

but now that we have it, maybe we can find something

-that takes Dip down. -You got it.

You can trust me.

Deal 'em up!

You think I'd know better

than to play cards with you.

Oh, you think you would.

[chuckles]

So I saw that Tripp post today.

So, is Cowher like a crazy person?

Or is he just getting out of control, or...

No, he's okay. I talked to him.

He may have ruined that kid's life.

I said I talked to him.

I'm not trying to upset you.

I'm just thinking maybe

he's not the guy you thought he was

when we gave him The Crotch.

Look, I hear what you're saying,

and I'm taking care of it, okay?

Fine.

I'll drop it. Just thought you'd wanna

talk it through with someone you trust.

I thought I heard the words,

"Okay, I'll drop it" come out of your mouth.

Why do you make it so hard for people to help you?

Because you're not trying to help me.

You're trying to remind me that you did it better

when you were The Crotch.

I'm sorry. That came out

a little harsher than I intended.

-No, it didn't. -Will...

-You say exactly what you mean. -Will!

You know, you're gonna need help someday.

And all the people that care about you,

they're not gonna be there

'cause you pushed 'em all away.

[song playing, man singing in French]

[door closes]

[sighs]

Hey, what's wrong with you?

I was up way too late last night.

Why, what were you doing?

Just fooling around on the computer.

Can we-- Can we, uh,

get our steps in at a slower rate, please?

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, can-- can I--

-can I ask you something? -Hmm.

Do you ever feel like Farrah isn't always

being upfront with you?

No more than usual.

[scoffs] See, that's what I mean.

Okay, it didn't use to bother me,

because I was always on the inside with her,

-but now it's-- -[engine revving]

[Hurley gasps]

Tripp?

[tires screeching]

-[car crashes] -[both gasp]

-Tripp! -Oh, my God!

Tripp went to the hospital.

I blame The Crotch.

I'm boycotting The Crotch.

It almost killed the dude.

This Crotch dude better hope

I never find out who he is.

Hey.

Hey.

I can't believe you guys were so close.

I'm really glad you're okay.

Yeah, we are.

Tell me you had nothing to do with this.

What?

I am with you every single day.

If you want something posted to The Crotch,

it gets posted.

So I need to hear you say

that you had nothing to do with this.

I had nothing to do with this.

[sighs]

So, what's with the pink hair?

It's more me.

Hey, we should team up

and try and figure out who The Crotch is.

I bet together we could find out.

Seems a little Farrah-esque, no?

No, 'cause Grace said, "Team up."