"Oh when you come to Japan don't expect everything to be so cute, and anime, and manga"

"哦，當你來日本的時候，不要指望所有的東西都是那麼可愛，還有動畫，漫畫"

They can suck a DUCK ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

他們可以吸吮一隻鴨子( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 。

Because I am here at my third, if not fourth amazing cafe. We are at the PomPomPurin Cafe.

因為我現在是在我的第三家，如果不是第四家神奇的咖啡館。我們在PomPomPurin咖啡館。

It is a pop-up event and he's getting together with his friend

這是一個流行的活動，他和他的朋友在一起。

Who's a pig who wears underpants

誰是穿內褲的豬？

And I'm an adult, surrounded by other adults, enjoying food shaped like a pudding retriever

而我是一個成年人，被其他成年人包圍著，享受著像布丁獵犬一樣的食物。

*GODZILLA ROAR*

*GODZILLA ROAR*

I love my life. I love my life

我愛我的生活我愛我的生活

*So Happy Cute Music!!*

*如此快樂可愛的音樂！

*Dying Man Warrior Flute*

*垂死的人戰士笛子*

Martina ordered all the food I ordered an extra-AH arigato gozaimasu

瑪蒂娜點了所有的食物，我點了一個額外的AH 阿里戈扎馬蘇。

I ordered these for me. If you wanted one you could have just asked for one

我為自己訂了這些。如果你想要一個，你可以直接要一個。

But you didn't so I have two toys, you have no toys

但你沒有，所以我有兩個玩具，你沒有玩具。

M: Listen you can keep one if you can answer one of my quiz questions

男：聽著，如果你能回答我的一道問答題，你就可以留一個。

No no no hey

不，不，嘿

M: I'm gonna give you a PomPomPurin Quiz and if you can get it correct

男：我給你做個PomPurin問答，如果你能答對的話

M: You can hang on to one of those, but if you get them incorrect you lose it

M：你可以掛在其中一個，但如果你把它們弄錯了，你就會失去它。

It's not fair, okay you bring me out to these cafes, and I just have to deal with it

這不公平，好吧，你把我帶到這些咖啡館，我就只能應付了。

M: POMPOMPURIN FACT

M：POMPOMPURIN FACT

And I just have to deal with it. This is my consolation. M: Okay ready?

而我只需要面對它。這是我的安慰。 M：好了準備好了嗎？

Pop Quiz! (skill testing question!!!)

啪啪答題!(技能測試題!!)

What would you say is PomPomPurin's, this is an easy one! What is his favorite food, and I need you to be specific

你會說什麼是PomPomPurin的，這個很簡單!他最喜歡的食物是什麼，我需要你說具體點

Let me see if both of our audio is recording. Okay, all these are recording right here, and let me just check on Safari

讓我看看我們的音頻是否都在錄製。好的，所有這些都在這裡錄製，讓我在Safari上檢查一下。

M: *gasp!*

M：*喘氣！*。

M: Simon! You're cheating! You can't cheat!

西蒙！你在作弊！你不能作弊！

I think PomPomPurin's (M: Yes) favorite food (Yes) is purin, which is pudding

我想PomPomPurin（男：是）最喜歡的食物（是）是嘌呤，就是布丁。

M: But I need you to be more specific, cause that's only a 50% answer

M：但我需要你說得更具體一些，因為這只是50%的答案。

His favorite kind of pudding is that yellow pudding, that has the little

他最喜歡的布丁是那種黃色的布丁，那有小的

M: No, I need you to be specific

M：不，我需要你說得具體一點。

PomPomPurin's favorite kind of pudding, is the pom pom pudding kind of pudding

PomPomPurin最喜歡吃的布丁，是絨球布丁的那種布丁。

(M: More specific than that) S: my god woman you asked me

男：比這更具體）S：我的天哪女人你問我。

M: It's his mom's pudding! It's his mom's purin, that's his favorite kind!

男：是他媽媽的布丁!是他媽媽的嘌呤，那是他最喜歡的一種!

M: His mom makes purin, and it's his favorite kind of pudding!

男：他媽媽做的是嘌呤，是他最喜歡的一種布丁!

S: You can't just...rip my toy...haha

S：你不能隨便......扯我的玩具......哈哈。

S: You don't deserve the toy

S：你不配得到這個玩具

How d... how dare you sir?

你怎麼... 你怎麼敢這樣做，先生？

Ohhoohoohoohoo

Ohhoohoohoohoo

How many people have done this?

有多少人做過這種事？

Probably a lot. Er mai gerd Duckie. It's got a little beret straw oh my gosh

可能是很多。Er mai gerd Duckie.它有一個小貝雷帽吸管哦，我的天哪。

Just need a minute. Just need a minute yo.

只是需要一分鐘。只是需要一分鐘喲。

So while Martina has the PomPomPurin shake, I have the PanpakaPantsu

所以當瑪蒂娜有PomPomPurin奶昔的時候，我有PanpakaPantsu。

M: It's that little guy up above him there

男：就是他上面那個小個子在那裡

S: And he's a pig who likes pants

S:他是一隻豬誰喜歡的褲子

Can't really relate to him nobody likes pants. I mean come on. It's an obvious thing

不能真正涉及到他 沒有人喜歡的褲子。我的意思是，來吧。這是一個明顯的事情

M: Pop quiz question for you!

男：給你出一道流行問答題!

Pop quiz! What is it?

啪啪答題!這是什麼？

M: Where is this pig from, in Japan?

男：這豬是哪裡來的，在日本嗎？

Um...the..the south side of it. South Siiiiiiiiiide

嗯......南邊的。南邊的Siiiiiiiiiide

M: I told you where he was from before

M：我之前告訴過你，他是哪裡人。

Did you?

你有嗎？

S: *In Chocobo voice* What's that Chocobo? Chocobo~, Chocobo~!

S:*那是什麼東西？Chocobo~，Chocobo~!

Baaaaa! ha ba ba ba ba ba!

哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈!

M: He's from Shizuoka. S: Oh Shizuoka!! M: Yeah, and do you know what his life goal is?

M：他是靜岡人。S：哦，靜岡啊!M：是啊，那你知道他的人生目標是什麼嗎?

To wear more pants?

要多穿褲子？

M: To find the best pants in the world. He travels around, looking for the best pants.

男：為了尋找世界上最好的褲子。他四處旅行，尋找最好的褲子。

S: That's a trick question because the best pants are no pants

S:這是個技巧性的問題 因為最好的褲子是沒有褲子的。

Click on the little button right there if you agree with me, and you know that you do.

如果你同意我的觀點，就點擊那裡的小按鈕，你知道你同意。

All right let me try this out

好吧，讓我來試一試

Oh! It's like a little Oreo milkshake wow I haven't had that flavor in a long time.

哦！就像一個小小的奧利奧奶昔哇，我已經很久沒有吃過這種味道了。

Let me stick in some ice cream in there

讓我在裡面加點冰激凌

Good choice Simon. Good choice.

好選擇西蒙。選得好

Ah! This is edible, right? (S: Just eat it)

啊！這個是可以吃的吧？(S：就吃吧)

Mmm

嗯

Whoa mine's a mango smoothie. It is intense wow. Ducky that is so good.

哇我的是芒果冰沙。它是激烈的哇。鴨子，是這麼好。

S: Oh, there are little strawberries at the bottom, I can see! M: Yeah!

S:哦，有小草莓在底部，我可以看到!M：是啊!

I don't think I can eat him

我想我吃不下他

S: I'll eat him if you can't

S：你不行我就吃了他。

S: You don't do it. I'll eat it

S：你不要這樣做。我吃了它

*GODZILLA ROAR*

*GODZILLA ROAR*

s: Is that like a Jesus paper, or is that styrofoam

s:那是像一個耶穌紙， 或者是發泡膠。

I'll never tell but, you try yours and find out!

我不會說的，但是，你試試你的就知道了!

*gagging?* Cardboard

*咽口水？

No, it's that um wafer paper. S: The Jesus paper. M: Yes, it's the Jesus paper as we call it.

不，是那個嗯威化紙。S：耶穌紙。M：對，就是我們所說的耶穌紙。

It does not taste great I'll be honest with you, but gosh darn isn't it cute?

味道不是很好，我會跟你說實話，但天哪，是不是很可愛？

I'm just gonna put him right back into his cup where he belongs

我只是要把他放回他的杯子裡去，他應該在那裡。

M: Look at my little "I love junk" thing

男：看我那 "我愛垃圾 "的小東西。

M:This is super cute look at this. Okay, who should I try first?

M:這個超級可愛的樣子。好吧，我應該先試試誰？

I'm gonna try PomPomPurin first (S: Go for PomPomPurin) Oh my god. This is like

我先試試PomPomPurin（S：去PomPomPurin）哦，我的天。這就像

I don't want to devastate him. This is super cute

我不想破壞他。這真是太可愛了

They used a mushroom as a bun, that's such a brilliant idea

他們用蘑菇來做包子，真是太聰明瞭

So how do I do this because if I take this out his hat might fall off, right?

那我該怎麼做，因為如果我把這個拿出來，他的帽子可能會掉下來，對嗎？

I don't even know what to do right now. I'm a little bit panicky.

我現在都不知道該怎麼辦了。我有點慌亂。

S: Girl you gotta eat it as a whole, maintain it's integrity. M:This is gonna be so messy

S:女孩你得吃它作為一個整體， 保持它的完整性。M:這將是如此混亂

I spilled stuff on my Love Junk sign! Nooooooooooooo

我把東西灑在了我的 "愛的垃圾 "牌子上!不！

*happy food sounds*

*快樂的食物聲*

It's actually really delicious

其實真的很好吃

S: Oh, yeah, what's in it?

S:哦，是的，什麼是在它？

M: It's a chicken burger with cheese

M：這是一個雞肉漢堡和奶酪

M: A little bit of demi-glace on top of it

M：在上面加一點半肉醬。

This is like a real little Swiss cheese, lettuce, and a fresh tomato. An actually delicious burger

這就像一個真正的小瑞士奶酪，生菜，和一個新鮮的西紅柿。一個真正美味的漢堡

*betrayal music*

*背叛音樂*

*betrayed PomPomPurin*

*背叛了PomPomPurin*

S: I wanna bite

S：我想咬

*Et tu Brutus?*

*"這就是布魯圖斯？

Oh. (S: Share with me) I was supposed to share with you? (Yeah) I see.

哦。(S：和我一起分享)我應該和你一起分享？(對)我明白了。

YOU HAVE TO ANSWER THIS POMPOMPURIN FACT FOR IT!

你必須回答這個POMPURIN FACT FOR IT!

S: I'm not answering sh*t girl!

S：我不回答狗屎女孩!

Yeah, I wasn't expecting quality when I came here, I just thought everything will be cute, but it was actually nice

是啊，我來到這裡的時候，並沒有期待品質，我只是覺得一切都會很可愛，但實際上是很好的。

This is a really pretty plate. I have to say

這盤子真漂亮。我不得不說

I always like my curries to be spicy, but it's still a nice wholesome PomPomPurin curry.

我一直喜歡我的咖喱是辣的，但這還是一個很健康的PomPomPurin咖喱。

*so betrayed music*

*所以背叛的音樂

Not the finest curry you'll find in Japan but it definitely makes you happy

雖然不是日本最頂級的咖喱，但絕對能讓你開心。

When Stockholm Syndrome has kicked in

當斯德哥爾摩綜合症發作時

And you start loving everything about these theme cafes (M: lol Stop it)

然後你就開始喜歡這些主題咖啡館的一切（M：呵呵，別鬧了）。

S: One thing you should know when you come to cafes like this is you're not coming here for amazing food

S:One thing you should know when you come to cafes like this is you're not coming here for amazing food. 有一件事你應該知道，當你來到這樣的咖啡館時，你不是來這裡吃東西的。

It's not bad food

這不是壞食物

But it's not the kind of food that we usually take you for.

但這不是我們平時帶你吃的那種食物。

What you're coming here for is a kind of different environment, a fun environment

你來這裡是為了一種不同的環境，一個有趣的環境。

You're coming here more for the aesthetic and the vibe, than for the actual food itself

你來這裡更多的是為了審美和氛圍，而不是為了食物本身。

M: And one thing I feel is that Japan's really good at details

M：還有一點，我覺得日本在細節方面真的很有優勢

So it's not like they're gonna half-ass it with just like a menu cover, like they do the menu, they do the walls

所以，它不像他們會半斤八兩它只是像一個菜單的封面， 就像他們做的菜單，他們做的牆壁。

Hey there, angry commentor

嘿，憤怒的評論家

I know you're probably really tempted to write the word WEEB in the comments

我知道你可能真的很想在評論裡寫上WEEB這個詞。

We see those a lot, but let me ask you something.

我們經常看到這些，但讓我問你一些事情。

What's wrong with me partaking in the culture when I'm here?

我在這裡的時候，參與文化有什麼不好？

Why is it that it's unacceptable for adults to enjoy cafes like this

為什麼成年人享受這樣的咖啡館是不能接受的呢？

But it's totally acceptable for you to follow sports teams so religiously?

但你這麼虔誠地追隨運動隊完全可以接受？

Have you ever thought about the hypocrisy of that?

你有沒有想過這其中的虛偽？

I'm sure a lot of you probably spend a lot of money watching your favorite sports teams

我相信你們中的很多人可能會花很多錢去看自己喜歡的運動隊。

Hell, you probably even have jerseys, and shoes made by little slave babies that you pay a whole lot of money for.

該死的，你可能連球衣、鞋子都是小奴隸寶寶做的，你花了很多錢買的。

And if you want to criticize me for enjoying the PomPomPurin cafe

如果你想責備我喜歡PomPomPurin咖啡館的話

Take a good hard look at your own life, and criticize yourself for being a dweeb

認真審視自己的生活，責備自己是個呆子。

That's the best comeback I could come back with (M: How about a SPWEEB?) S: A SQUEEB

這是我能回的最好的回擊了（M：來個SPWEEB怎麼樣？）S：來個SQUEEB。

M: A squeeb, a sports weeb

男：一個squeeb，一個運動weeb。

Are you gonna?

你會嗎？

Are you gonna put a little paint under your eyes and watch your favorite football team and cry when they don't make it into the Playoffs?

你要在眼睛下面塗點油漆，看著你最喜歡的足球隊，當他們進不了季後賽的時候，你會哭嗎？

Don't be a dork.

不要做一個白痴。

Yes I have converted to the dark side

是的，我已經改邪歸正了

I was a naysayer, but now I'm stuck here, for the rest of my life

我曾經是個反對者，但現在我被困在這裡，一輩子都被困在這裡。

M: I don't think I properly explained just who Pompompurin actually is.

M：我覺得我沒有好好解釋，只是龐普林到底是誰。

Pompompurin is a Golden Retriever Purin, which means he's a big pudding

Pompompurin是一隻金毛犬Purin，也就是說它是一隻大布丁。

And he sleeps in a tiny purin sized basket outside of a little girl's house

他睡在一個小女孩家外面的一個小皮林大小的籃子裡

And his beret is meant to like represent when you have a purin, when there's like the caramel and sugar sauce on top

而他的貝雷帽是為了代表當你有一個purin， 當有像焦糖和糖醬在上面。

His favorite things to do include going outside, walking, and exercising.

他最喜歡做的事情包括外出、散步和運動。

His favorite word is okay, let's go play!

他最喜歡的詞是好，我們去玩吧!

But he doesn't like stop, or that's enough.

但他不喜歡停下來，或者說這就夠了。

He was born in April, 1996

他生於1996年4月

S: Is that...is that the truth? M: It's pretty accurate (S: Oh gosh)

S：這......是事實嗎？M：還挺準的（S：哦，天哪）。

I'm on the Pompompurin Sanrio wiki, there's a Wikipedia page for Pompompurin

我在Pompompurin Sanrio wiki上，有一個Pompompurin的維基百科頁面。

Pompompurin (M:yes) was introduced in 1996 (uh-huh)

蓬蓬林(M:yes)於1996年推出(嗯哼)

And his birthday is April 16 (M: Uh-huh) on a sunny day. (Yes)

而他的生日是4月16日（男：嗯哼），是個晴天。(是的)

He lives near the front door of a girl's house (M: Yes he does) In a special purin sized basket (He sure does)

他住在一個女孩家大門附近（男：是的，他住在一個特別的檁條大小的籃子裡（他當然住在這裡）。

He loves the phrase "Let's go out." (M: Uh-huh) But hates the phrase "Stay"

他喜歡 "我們出去吧 "這句話。(M: Uh-huh)但討厭 "留下來 "這句話。

(he loves?) His mother's cream pudding, and he loves anything soft

他媽媽做的奶油布丁，他喜歡任何柔軟的東西。

M: How many points of correct did I get?

男：我得了多少分的正確率？

Too many! It's...it's unsettling, you just know too much

太多了!這是... ... 這是令人不安的，你只是知道太多。

So you remember I told you I wrote down some Pompompurin facts in my fact book?

你還記得我說過，我在我的實錄裡寫下了一些龐培林的事實嗎？

I lied I just had them memorized

我騙你的，我只是把它們背下來了

I just can't help it

我就是忍不住

I think that it's so wholesome and wonderful like there's a sign behind us that says

我覺得它是如此的健康和美好 就像我們身後有一塊牌子，上面寫著...

"Making pancakes and friends" and like, Pompompurin and the Pig Pants Guy are hanging out together

"做煎餅和朋友"，就像，龐龐普林和豬褲男在一起閒逛一樣

They're like, "Let's make some pancakes together."

他們就像，"讓我們一起做一些煎餅。"

S: I think you're such a sweet and endearing girl

S：我覺得你真是個可愛又惹人愛的女孩。

Hey, so like if you guys are free later on maybe we could hang out and I can make pancakes with you

嘿，所以像如果你們以後有空的話 也許我們可以一起出去玩，我可以和你們一起做煎餅。

And we could just become friends together

我們可以一起成為朋友

Oh, you're busy running an empire. I see.

哦，你正忙著經營一個帝國。我明白了 I see.

I mean, what are you doing? Oh? You're traveling to find more pants?

我的意思是，你在做什麼？ 哦？哦，你要去旅行，找更多的褲子？

Cool cool. No. That's cool. I mean...um...could you like...could you like sign my shirt?

酷，酷不，這很酷。我的意思是... ... 嗯... ...你能不能... ...你能不能在我的襯衫上簽名？

I'm just like a really oh, you're...you don't have any fingers. No cool..c-cool...cool. No. I totally understand

我就像一個真的哦，你...你沒有手指。沒有酷... ...酷... ...酷。不，我完全理解

*whispers* I-I love...I love you Pompompurin

*我... 我愛... 我愛你龐普林

And this is why people think we're weird, and why people who like anime are weird.

這也是為什麼大家覺得我們很奇怪，為什麼喜歡動漫的人都很奇怪。