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  • It's like even though I know it's impossible, sometimes I still think I might be on the Truman Show.

    儘管我知道不可能,但有時我還是覺得我可能會上楚門實境秀。

  • Anyway, didn't you guys say that you had some single friends at this party?

    總之,你們不是說這派對上有些單身的朋友嗎?

  • Oh, yeah.

    有啊。

  • But trust me, you're too good for them.

    但相信我,他們都配不上妳的。

  • What?

    什麼?

  • Oh, yeah.

    沒錯。

  • You're way too good to date any of our friends.

    妳太優秀了,他們沒有一個朋友配得上妳。

  • I mean I guess that's a compliment, but like really?

    我猜你們是在是讚美我吧,但真的假的?

  • All of them?

    全部嗎?

  • I mean, what about...what about this guy?

    我的意思是,這個傢伙如何?

  • Oh, Mark.

    噢,他是Mark。

  • Yeah, I've known him since we were kids.

    我們從小就認識了。

  • He is so funny.

    他非常幽默。

  • Okay.

    好喔。

  • But he's also super arrogant, afraid of commitment, and doesn't believe in holidays.

    但同時,他非常高傲、害怕給承諾,而且他不慶祝節日的。

  • What? That's insane.

    蛤?太扯了吧?

  • Okay, what about this guy?

    那這個傢伙呢?

  • Oh, Rauger.

    噢,是 Rauger。

  • We met in college.

    我們是大學認識的。

  • And honestly, we had one of the most meaningful hikes of my entire life together.

    老實說,我們一起去了我人生中最有意義的遠足。

  • That's so nice!

    那還不錯喔!

  • But he is a narcissist, only reads Ayn Rand, and doesn't believe in holidays.

    但他是個自戀狂,只讀 Ayn Rand 的書,而且他也沒有在慶祝節日。

  • What? That's crazy.

    什麼?太荒唐了吧!

  • Why are you friends with these people?

    你們為什麼要跟這些人當朋友?

  • They're good friends.

    他們適合當朋友啊!

  • Totally fine.

    一點也沒錯。

  • They just make for bad partners.

    他們只是不適合當伴侶。

  • Okay.

    好吧!

  • What about this guy?

    不然這個傢伙呢?

  • He's literally petting a puppy.

    他正在和小狗玩。

  • Oh Grugery, yes.

    噢,是 Grugery。

  • That is the dog that he got from the rescue center.

    這隻狗是他從動物救援組織救出來的。

  • He's so smart, super successful, and insanely funny.

    他很聰明又非常成功,也極為幽默。

  • He's just a really fun guy.

    他真的是個很有趣的傢伙。

  • But he also steals from department stores, thinks reading is consumerist, and cheats on all his girlfriends.

    但他會偷百貨公司的東西,認為閱讀是消費主義,還對他歷任的女友都不忠。

  • And he doesn't believe in holidays.

    而且,他也不會慶祝節日。

  • What the fuck guys?

    搞什麼鬼啊?

  • Why are you friends with these people?

    你們為什麼要和這些人當朋友?

  • Look, they're just our friends.

    聽著,他只是我們的朋友啊!

  • Sometimes we don't see them for weeks or even months.

    有時會好幾個星期、甚至幾個月都見不到他們。

  • They just pop in and out of our lives, and we see them in the context in which we enjoy them.

    他們在我們的生命中來來去去,我們在特定環境下見面時,相處都很融洽。

  • But a partner, you gotta know that you can rely on them.

    但談到伴侶,你必須知道對方是否可以依靠。

  • You need to know that they are solid.

    你必須知道對方是否可以信賴。

  • That they complete you.

    對方要能讓你更完整。

  • Man, that is some shit Krogery would say.

    天啊,這些都是 Krogery 會講的話。

  • He is the best.

    他是極品。

  • He is a bad listener.

    他不善於傾聽。

  • The life of the party.

    他是派對的重點人物。

  • He doesn't believe in medicine.

    他不相信醫學。

  • Amazing chef.

    他是個厲害的大廚。

  • Will break your heart in an instant.

    但他會立刻讓你心碎。

  • Never let your guard down around him.

    千萬別對他掉以輕心。

  • Why do we do this?

    為什麼我們要這樣?

  • Why do we permit our friends to be fine to us and terrible to their significant others?

    為什麼我們要默許我們的朋友對我們很好,卻對他們的另一半很糟糕呢?

  • Today is the day that this stops.

    今天,這一切都得停止。

  • That we demand that our friends be better.

    我們得要求我們的朋友變得更好。

  • That they're good to everyone in their life.

    讓他們對他們生命中的每個人都是有好處的。

  • So, is Rekha single or what?

    所以,Rekha 是單身嗎?

  • Oh my God, Rekha is awesome.

    天啊,Rekha 超棒的。

  • But she's super judgemental.

    但她很愛批評別人。

  • She collects all this intel about people before she even knows them, which is understandable sometimes.

    她會在認識別人之前去蒐集所有關於他的情報,這有時是合情合理的。

  • But other times, it's just wrongful.

    但其他時候,這樣做是不恰當的。

  • And it prevents her from being in a relationship.

    這也讓她談不成戀愛。

  • Yikes!

    哇塞!

  • Baggage much?

    問題很多?

  • Yeah, all my friends are terrible.

    對啊,我所有的朋友都很糟。

  • Ah, whose aren't?

    誰的不是呢?

  • Okay, what about this one?

    那這隻呢?

  • [Yeah, Pouchy's great, but super needy, also he doesn't believe in holidays.]

    [嗯,Pouchy 不錯,但他很黏人,也不慶祝節日。]

  • Oh, that bad.

    真糟糕。

  • God, everything sucks.

    天啊,一切都糟透了。

  • Hi, I'm Rekha from College Humor.

    嗨,我是 College Humor 頻道的 Rekha 。

  • Click here to subscribe.

    點擊這裡來訂閱。

  • Click here for other fun stuff and thank you so much for watching.

    點擊這看更多有趣的影片,還有非常謝謝你們的觀看。

  • I love my job, and I'm definitely not trapped in this video. [Help]

    我愛我的工作,我絕對沒有被困在這影片裡。[救命]

  • Things are great.

    一切都很好。

It's like even though I know it's impossible, sometimes I still think I might be on the Truman Show.

儘管我知道不可能,但有時我還是覺得我可能會上楚門實境秀。

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