字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 -On your marks, get set, go! -Go, Winnie, go, Winnie, go, Winnie. Go, Winnie, go, Winnie, go, Winnie. -Careful! -Yes, you got to go. Franny, go! You can go! -I did it! -Go, Franny, go, go, go, go! -Go! Slide on in! -Here I come! -Franny, don't let Daddy beat you! -[ Screams ] -[ Laughs ] -...Franny! -Franny! -I'll get you next time. Let's start the show. ♪♪ -♪ We in the house ♪ ♪ Come on ♪ -Tonight join Jimmy and his guests -- Queen Latifah... Pete Davidson and Judd Apatow... musical guest James Taylor... and the legendary Roots crew. It's "The Tonight Show: At Home Edition." -♪ We in the house, y'all ♪ -And now here's Jimmy. -Hey, everybody. Welcome to "Tonight Show: At Home Edition." I want to thank @AlexPresley- on TikTok for that back slide race. We've been doing it, and it's really fun at the house. All right. Let's do tonight's monologue. -Wind me up, barber! It's time for the monologue! -Hey, guys. This weekend is Mother's Day. But because of the pandemic, Hooters isn't offering their annual free meal for Mom. I'm sorry, honey. Kids and I will try to make it up to you. We'll make your day special still. Don't worry. Well, it's our eighth week of quarantine, and I heard that some people are trying to relax by turning their homes into spas. Yeah, you just lie facedown, turn on some soothing music, then your kids jump on your back until you turn on a movie for them. Listen to this. Disney is now offering the Disney bundle -- Gary. Gary, get out of there. That's -- What were you doing in there? -Looking for something to roll in again. -Yeah. Gary might have caught some fox disease or something. -[ Chuckles ] -Gary, what are you even doing? Maybe you're just an inside dog. Gary? Gary. You seem concerned. Listen to this. Disney is now offering the Disney bundle which includes Hulu, ESPN+, and Disney+ for $12.99 a month. And this is cool -- for an extra $5, you can own Disney. Well, this isn't good. I read that Hawaii authorities have been arresting rogue tourists who are not abiding to the state's quarantine orders. Also I'm 99% sure that "Rogue Tourist" is a straight-to-DVD movie starring Liam Neeson. [As Neeson] "I'm the rogue tourist. I've got one grass skirt, two bowls of poi. Race you to the gift shop." Check this out. The first sample of Kanye's Yeezy 451 sneakers have been released. Take a look at these things. Huh. They look like they're whispering, "Water." [ Chuckles ] It's the only shoe where they ask if you want it in a cup or a cone. I saw a new study that says raptors may have hunted solo and not in packs like in "Jurassic Park." So I guess the 1993 movie about a totally safe dinosaur theme park isn't historically accurate. Gotcha! Ha ha! And finally, this is incredible. A 14-year-old high-school graduate has been accepted into eight California Universities. When I heard that, my first thought was, "Damn, I got to transfer my kids into THAT homeschool." Guys, that is our monologue right there. Thank you very much. What a show we have for you tonight. Queen Latifah is here. Judd Apatow, Pete Davidson are here. And we got great music from James Taylor. The one and only James Taylor. Oh, my gosh. He's doing "Close Your Eyes" with his wife and his son. I know. I was thinking about jumping in and seeing if I could get -- Maybe we'll do a song. "Close Your..." That's going to be just -- It's just going to be beautiful. I love him so much. I love the whole fam. I'm so happy they're here. Guys, it's time for "Hashtags." ♪♪ ♪ Hashtags ♪ -Hey, guys, it's time for "Hashtags." The hashtags today are #QuarantineMomQuotes. These are quotes from your mom made during the quarantine, because Mother's Day is coming up. So here we go. Our first one here is from @trixsyoyoforreal. They say, "When my mom goes on her daily walk, she always says, 'If something happens to me, call me.'" This one's from @quarantineq14. She says, "Mom -- Aunt Cheryl wants to Vroom. You have to show me how to do it. ME -- Mom, do you mean Zoom? Mom -- No. Vroom." [ Laughs ] Vroom should be the next level. That's $15.99 if you want the full -- if you want to Vroom. Right now you're Zooming. I want to Vroom! Yeah. This one's from @Hannahzylstra. Zylstra? "My mom now ends our conversations with, 'Love you, drive safe, and don't lick anything.'" Okay. Thanks, Mom. Thanks, Mom. I won't lick anything. Thank you. This one's from @amandathinks13. Her mom said, "I heard Gigi and Hadid are going to be parents. Good for them." [ Laughs ] "Gigi and Hadid." [ Chuckles ] This one is from @mbodyspirit. They say, "Yes, you can keep using the iPad. Please keep using the iPad." That's a mom that needs a break. These are #QuarantineMomQuotes. This one's from @teachnwolves. She says, "We are rationing the Cool Whip." "Hey!" [ Laughs ] "Hey! We're rationing the Cool Whip, okay? One dollop. One flop on each dessert." This one's from @thechap9. They say -- "Mom said, your dad is your parent now." "Your dad is your parent now, okay? I had enough, okay? Had enough of you, so your dad is your parent now, okay?" These are #QuarantineMomQuotes. This one's from @countbasic2. He says -- His mom said -- [ Laughs ] "I've been watching that Amazon show with the funny British lady, 'Scumball.'" [ Laughs ] "You mean 'Fleabag.'" Yeah. It's not "Scumball." [ Laughs ] This one's from @lckcvmj. She says her mom said, "I'm not an angry person. You guys just make me angry." "Simple as that. I'm not an angry person." This last one's from @herndongearis. He says his mom says, "Dinner is poured." There you guys have it. Those are our hashtags. Happy Mother's Day, everybody. We'll be right back with more "Tonight Show." Queen Latifah, Judd Apatow, Pete Davidson, James Taylor. Come on back, everybody. ♪♪ -I want to pitch! [ Indistinct conversation ] ♪♪ -Yes! -Ohh! Franny, What are you doing? ♪♪ -Powerhouse. ♪♪ [ Laughter ] -Winnie, you're so good.
A2 初級 今夜秀。在家版 (標籤: #QuarantineMomQuotes) (The Tonight Show: At Home Edition (Hashtags: #QuarantineMomQuotes)) 3 0 林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字