字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 Let's kick it off with a story that'll make everyone smile. Well, everyone except the coronavirus. This lady has seen a lot in her life. She survived the Spanish Flu, early in the last century, and now at 101, she has just beaten Covid-19. MAN: Call her "Super Granny." Angelina Friedman proudly shares, "I am 101 years old and I beat Covid-19." The Westchester, New York woman not only beat the coronavirus at her nursing home, but also lived through the 1918 Spanish Flu. Her family says the centenarian possesses "superhuman DNA." Yes? Good. Damn. This woman lived through the Spanish Flu, and beat coronavirus? Not to mention that in 2010, she also beat Bieber Fever. She was one of the lucky few. And coronavirus must be really embarrassed by this. I mean, you got beaten by a 101-year-old woman. I bet corona's there with all the other diseases like, "She didn't beat me, man. I let her win." But one thing is clear. If you've ever given your grandmother a "World's Greatest Grandma" mug, you better confiscate that thing immediately. Yeah. "Sorry, Meemaw. Turns out you ain't shit." And here's some more good news. In the last few weeks, some countries have slowly been emerging from their corona hibernation, and now, even Italy, one of the hardest hit countries, is starting to open up again. MAN: After eight weeks of silence, today, the streets of Italy are slowly coming back to life. Construction sites, factories and parks reopening. Italians will be able to travel locally and order takeout. MAN 2: Joggers allowed once again to run in parks long off limits. In Rome's iconic Campo de Fiori flower market, the florists have returned. Cafes like the Antico Caffè Greco, the oldest in Rome, can once again serve coffee. In 260 years, has this cafe ever been closed? Never, never closed. -Not even during World War II? -No. Hoorah! (Italian accent): "Italy is getting-a back to work." That is such great news, man. Because there's a lot of work to be done in Italy. I mean, corona-- ooh-- corona really messed up that whole country. The towers are falling over, the streets are flooded, their stadiums are in ruins. It's a mess over there right now. I do worry about Italy, though, because Italians are all about kissing and hugging. But with coronavirus still out there, they can't do all of that. How are they gonna show affection, huh? Because I mean, we-we can replace handshakes with elbows. We can just do that thing. But that won't work for the Italian kiss. (with Italian accent): "Good to see you, Giovanni. Hyah, hyah, hyah, hyah." Basically what I'm saying is, post-coronavirus, every country is just gonna have to become Russia. (with Russian accent): "We do not touch. "We do not kiss. "When I make love, I just stare so hard at them that they can feel it." Here's another fun story. Every day, we're hearing about how animals are thriving without us. But in Japan, it turns out that there are some animals that just miss our face. A Japanese aquarium is asking people to make video calls to their eels. Why? It's all to remind the sensitive creatures, humans exist and don't pose a threat. With a largely human-free environment the last couple months, aquarium staff say, when keepers try to check on the garden eels, they hide in the sand. In a bid to reacquaint the eels with humans, they aquarium is setting up five tablets and asking eel enthusiasts to connect via FaceTime. That's right. Because there haven't been any visitors at the zoo, the zoo wants people to video chat with the eels so that they remember humans and don't view them as a threat when people come back. Yeah. Although if you ask me, reminding the eels about humans will have the opposite effect. "Why is the ocean so small? "Oh, right. The humans put us in a water zoo." Oh, and you know what the good news is? Eels are perfectly designed for video chat. Yeah, because if anyone tries to flash their penis on these Zoom calls, the eels-- they're not gonna be phased. They'll just be like, "Ah, look at that. "Another eel on the call. "A very strange eel. "So small and so pale. He must be sick."