Uh, he's, of course, on CBS.

Ah, he's beloved Steven Colbert.

So good to have you on my show, Steven.

Thank you, Conan.

Now, a lesser man would would fight with you right now.

I say no, no, you're on my show.

But I have been a host long enough to know that the host actually does most of the work.

So you go right ahead, buddy.

I said to me, all the weight's on you now makes you fell into my trap.

Beautiful judo move, babe.

Everyone.

Free gun?

Uh, no.

Sure You're not wearing a tie, Conan?

No, e, I haven't.

I'm not wearing a tie.

And I see that you've become a Senate page.

Congratulations.

Thank you very much.

Thank you very much.

How are you handling your isolation?

I miss the laughter.

I miss the joy that I bring others.

Well, what about your show?

Do you miss that?

How about you?

How are you handling it?

I missed the audience because I get all of my value from their praise.

Yeah, you know I have No, I have no self worth at all.

Yeah, I only exist, really in reflection to them, chanting my name.

So it's been rough.

It's been rough times.

That's great that your audience chants your name.

Mind.

Stop doing that about four years ago when they chant my name.

Now it's usually has an angry mob, so I envy you.

Thank you very much.

You are using state of the art equipment I tune and I check out your show.

You're clearly and I know my cameras.

You're on a, I think a Sony H D C 1704 k those air.

Incredible.

You look amazing.

What are you doing?

And you Have you have an ear piece?

I don't have any year peace.

Look at that.

I have no ear piece.

My I have be just broke or your catheter.

He can't hear me, Kenny.

I could hear you now, Steven.

No, Steven, Because not ever air.

You clearly have the Tiffany network ship in hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of equipment.

It had all been boiled in alcohol so you could have this amazing camera.

What are you doing?

Why?

My looks like the garage.

It's a sit down.

It's a Sony x X de Camp HD.

You're right.

Yeah, exactly.

You know why?

Because I've been in this business a long time, and I know my cameras.

Uh huh.

Yeah, I have a satellite truck parked on my lawn.

Incredible.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Let me tell you how I got here.

Wait.

Listen, buddy, I did it your way for the first a week, did it?

I literally just did everything off of an iPad balanced on the side of a bathtub with a bottle of bubble bath to keep from tipping in and killing me.

Okay, so don't tell me I've been in it.

Let me tell you how I've been doing it.

We record my show on a flip phone.

When the show is over, I put it into a cardboard tube and I put it in the U.

S.

Mail and it goes to Turner headquarters in Atlanta.

That's how we've been doing it.

So don't preach to me with your story of O your hardships.

You've got a satellite truck on your lawn.

It's been years since I saw a satellite truck.

Bitter and enraged.

Can you tell e Back off, please.

God, that was like a topographical map of Mars.

Now, I'm surprised the local morgue let you borrow their lighting for Okay.

Okay.

What do you This is Shecky Colbert.

Now that I'm very, very good Tolerate, You know, your lovely family.

Are they helping you do this?

Because I got my son here.

My daughter's doing my makeup.

My wife is a is a rodeo clown.

Yeah, they're all pitching in.

Uh, my family will not help me in the least.

Nobody wants to help me.

Um, yeah.

They really don't think American needs my show.

They keep telling me there's plenty of late night shows out there.

I keep asking for help, and they say, Stop it.

Just stop it.

Go take a nap.

Uh, my son was the cameraman for one bit that we shot.

And after the first take, I said, I think we need one more take.

And he said You get one more and that's it.

So through his union, So he's 14 years old and he was like, That is it.