Andthenoneday I got a tweetsaying, Hey, we'rehaving a babyand I wenttoallthoseandallthepicturesonherandherboyfriendallgonelikeso I textedherand I said, Hey, what's goingon?
Areyouokay?
Whathappened?
Andshesaid, I can't sayanythingyetbecausetheFBItoldmenotto.
That's right.
Oh, thisisthatgirlthatyou'retalkingabout?
Yeah.
Andshegoes, I couldtellyouabout a person, buteventhen I don't know.
Whatdoesthatmean?
I don't know.
Shewaslike, youknow, Butoneday I wanttotellyouaboutthis.
I need I needtotellpeopleaboutthis.
I justcan't yet.
Sothenshecalledmeandshewaslike, talkingtoyou.
I can't seeanything.
I'm soscaredthatthey'relistening.
I waslike, Okay, thisisanalienday.
Whatisgoingon?
Sensethat I kindoffoundoutit's inpieces, butnotso I sawsupposedvideosayingthatshewasfinallytalkabouteverything.
I justgotanideahowtomakeChuck E CheeseisfatterthanABBAbrandnewpizzagenius.
If I dosaysomyself.
So I have a that I wantedtotalkaboutfor a longtime, but I don't knowifanybody's gonnacharacterforme.
I thinkit's crazy.
I alsodon't knowjustgiveme a suit.
So I'm gonnasayonceagain, likejust a theory, not a fact.
Don't sueme.
Couldjustbe a joke.
Hoax.
Whatever.
Now, thisissomethingthat I actuallythoughtaboutwhen I was a kidand I noticedsomethingwhenever I gottacheckinchesandmineas a kidwasaboutDoyoureally?
Notliterally?
No.
There's a theorythatifsomebodyatrefugeesdoesn't finishtheirwholepizzaandthere's like a fewpiecesleft, theemployeeswilltakethattotheback, takethosepiecesoffthetripandform a newpizzawithalltheotherleftoverson.
Thenreheatitandserveit, customer.
Now I knowwhatyou'rethinkingshape.
That's crazy.
Well, hereis a picture.
Everypieceis a differentsizethatpeaceislongerthanthatpiece, whichisshorterthanthatpiece.
I askedheraboutthisbecauseshewasworkingatcheeseandshetoldmethatshecouldn't saywhetherornotthat's true, butthatthatwas a thinglikethatwassomethingthatactuallywasgoingon a whileagowhentheystoppedit.
Butshealsohadbeenlying.
Whoknows, Right?
So I'veneveractuallyfullylookedintothisbecause, youknow, I thoughtonewhocares.
When I waslikeSom, hewashonestly, reallyattractiveandinshapeandtallblondhairandblueeyesandget a cuteaccentwhichmostgirlsarelike a suckerforsomeoneinthecommonpastforyoutobeSerbianinthenextbooth.
Butonthedayhestartedtalkingaboutmoneyprettyquickly, likeabouthowhisfamily, like, youknow, I hadallthesebusinesses.
Hewas a doctor.
Hebasicallyhadcomewith, like, youknow, allthismoneyinhisbankaccountbecausehejustfinishedmedicalschoolandhejustwanted, like, kindofsowhisoatsandspenttimein L.
A beforebucklingdownandbeing a doctorlikeitsoundsliketheperfect, liketheperfect.
Butforme, itkindofturnedmeoff a littlebecause I feltlikehewastryingtoimpressmewithhismoney, and I didn't reallylikehimon a date.
Butthenhewalkedmebacktomycarandheaskedmeout, likeon a seconddate, rightthenandthereitkindofcaughtmeoffguardandthenusonthenextday.
Yeah, Andthen I rememberwewenton a datewherewejusthungoutinthepark, andthenhe, like, changed, openedup.
Buthewasmoresweet.
Anditwasthenthat I startedtofallforhim.
Andthen, likewithin a month, hetoldmehewasgonnahavetogobacktoSerbia.
Saidthebusinesseswerefallingapartwithoutmaybe a monthintodatinghisbusinesspartnerandhismomJustcallhimupandscreamatmyhouseandyelling, Theycuthimofffinanciallyoncehedecidedtostayandbearoundme.
Sowhen I methimlike a reallyniceLexushas, like, moneyinthebank, nicedesignerthings.
So I believedhim, eventhough I I just I believeditbecausehewassocharismatic.
Unbelievable.
Andandthat s o.
Milosleftmewiththedog.
We'regonnahavesomefuntoday.
So, um, basically, I amfinanciallysupportinghim.
I'm payingallthebills.
I gotto a pointin, like, marchof 2016 where I wasreadytoleavethem.
Itwouldn't takemuchforhimbefore.
Hewas, like, screamingandyellingatme, anditstartedoutlikebeinganyonegoforhoursatfirst, whenhedidit, youjusthappened, likeonce a weeklike, butthenitgottobewhere I usedtocountthedaysinbetweenrealityandwhenyoudidn't yellatmefor a week, I waslike, reallyexcited.
Yougotreallybad.
Thesanestthing.
I wasreadytobreakupwithhim, butthat's whenmyperiodwaslate.
SoyouitwasItwasreallyhard, butitwaslikelike I alwayswanted a family.
But I didn't wanttobewithMilosatthatpoint.
Thisisevenstupider.
Don't belikeme, girls.
Becausehewas a doctor.
Hetoldmethatifhepulledout, I couldgetpregnant.
Andtrustme, noonewasmoreshockedthan I waspregnantthanme.
And I haveaccident.
Shouldn't beonsomething.
Shouldn't webeusingsomething?
Because I wasnotreadytohavekidsyet.
Butsodoyouthinkhisgoalwaspercent?
Yeah, becausehewanted I thinkheknewatthatpointthat I wantedtogetout.
Heprobablywantedhangontome.
Soweshouldtestthisoutaroundjustwatchingyouwait.
Closeyoureyes, Wade.
Lightinhereis a closerorsomething.
Close, right?
I loveyou.
Really?
Doyouknowwhere I wantsexwithyou?
Do I?
Yeah.
AndyoutakemetotalkHopenow I e I like.
I wouldn't belikeShane's.
Butlike, thatcomputerprobablysoundslikeshame.
Now, toreallyputmycomputervoicetothetest, I amgoingtocallmydearsweetmother.
Andifit's onthephone, it's, youknow, I justthinkthat's what I wasthinking.
Itsoundedlikeyouwerejustkindoflikegoingthrough a tunnel.
Hey, uh, I think I'm comingdownwith a virus.
Oh, wow.
Youfeelbad?
I wasmessingaroundwithyou.
Youweretalkingto a computer.
Okay.
Hey.
Oh, that's allthat's onyouorwhatareyouguysdoing?
Oh, givemetheteawithyourcommunity.
Thatsoundsprettygood.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'm justgoingtoseemlikeChuck E.
Cheeseishistoryoflawsuits, justincase.
And I foundpeoplesuingthatthiswas a $5 millionlawsuit.
Butifyouarelisteningthrough a phoneinyourbrain, kindofcancelsthatout, somethingyou'rejustleftwithWhatactuallysoundlikeyou.
But I couldtotallyimagine a scenariowhereifyouhadlessthanstellaraudioqualityandyouwerein a differentroomfromthespeaker, youcouldabsolutelyfakesomeonesayingsomethingreelected.