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♀R: Hey guys! Today we’re here with Grace and her husband Ryosuke.
♂R & G: Hi!! ♀R: From the channel:
G: Texan in Tokyo! ♀R: Texan in Tokyo!
J: You two are so close. ♀R: They recently started their own channel
and they’ve had a blog for quite a while. G: I draw comics and I do blog posts about
being in an interracial, intercultural relationship and also just being broke newlyweds in Tokyo!
♀R: They VERY graciously let us stay here in their apartment last night after our big
meet-up in Tokyo. G: It was so much fun!
♀R: SO MUCH FUN omg! G: There were so many people!
J: It was crazy. ♀R: And we found out we have a ton in common,
especially when it comes to being married to Japanese guys. So we’re going to talk
about a few of those things today. ♀R: The number one… strangest thing, maybe…
J: “Strange…” G: Sorry.
♀R: Sorry! They’re just big differences. J: It’s all right.
♀R: Feet in Japan are considered really dirty, and it’s never been a big deal for
me in America. G: But when we came here, then like… When
we first started dating, he wanted me to wipe my feet with wet wipes before I got into bed.
♂R: With this! G: Omg, you brought them? Really?? And I was
just like, are you serious? I’m not… I’m just going to go to my own bed, then.
♀R: Right! And then we already take off our shoes here inside the house, and for me
that’s like… oh, this is already clean in here.
G: Especially if I took off my shoes, I’m wearing socks all day, and now you want me
to clean my feet before I get into bed? Like… no. Sorry.
♀R: Jun’s the same way. Like, feet are dirty.
J: Like, never ever have your legs on the pillow or something.
♀R: Oh yeah. And he freaks out if my feet touch the pillow.
♂R: Oh… J: Right?!
G: There was one time I hurt my leg and I was propping it up with pillows, and he was like, “What are you doing?! Stop
it!” ♀R: I’m like a monkey, so my feet are
everywhere. At home [America] I’m barefoot everywhere, like run outside in the yard,
“WOO free!” G: But not here.
♀R: No, not here. G: Ahh… yeah, feet.
♀R: Feet. ♀R: Number 2 was telling your friends and
family that you’re in a relationship. G & ♂R: Ahh yeah.
♀R: In America people are so open with their relationships. And even if they’re not,
they’ll tell one person and then that one person will tell everyone. So everyone knows.
G: Everyone knows. ♀R: Right, there’s no such thing as a
secret relationship in America. That’d be kind of weird, actually.
G: Yeah, or there’s a serious reason you’re hiding it, like they’re not your only girlfriend
or something. ♀R: Yeah, right! Exactly. If you’re hiding
it then it’s usually because you’ve got someone else…
G: And even just telling your friends. So, he studied abroad, Ryosuke studied abroad
at my university and so we had a lot of the same friends so a lot of his friends were my friends.
And they started talking to me and they were like, “Grace, it’s kind of weird. Ryosuke
never talks about you. Are you guys okay?” And I thought that was really weird because
I talk to everyone about my relationship ‘cause like… I’m a girl, and I was so in love!
But it’s like a Japanese thing where you don’t really talk in depth about your relationship
to you friends. And so it was weird.
♀R: Yeah.
J: Sorry.
♀R: It took Jun a while to tell all of his friends, too.
♂R: It's still kind of weird for me.
J: We don't really feel for need, for example
like Facebook, to change the status. G: Facebook official.
J: One of my friends got married recently. I didn't even know he had a girlfriend.
G: Sometimes I can’t tell when my friends are dating. I was in a club and these two
people were dating—I had no idea. It was when I was studying abroad in Japan. And they’d
been dating for three years and I was friends with her, she just never really talked about
the fact that she was dating this other guy. And so it was like, “Oh… okay. Cool!”
♀R: They’re just so private about their relationships here.
G: Which can be good. ♀R & J: Yeah.
J: Two more? G: Two more.
♀R: Number 3—those were the communication issues, right? This is HUGE. This is probably
with everyone who’s in an international relationship.
G: Or intercultural, or if there’s any language barrier.
♀R: Language barrier, yeah. And apparently it seems like Japanese guys who are learning
English end up making the same sort of mistakes. G: Yeah.
♀R: Because English phrases have specific nuances and you kind of just have to study
the language and know what those nuances are. J: But you can’t really learn or study nuances
unless you make mistakes. ♂R: True.
♀R: Yeah. Right. So, for example, sometimes I would call Jun, upset, on Skype. And I wouldn’t
even be able to talk to him because I’d be so upset, I’d be crying. And then Jun,
instead of saying, “What’s wrong?” which is what we’d usually say in English, he
would say, “What’s wrong with you?” Which has a completely different connotation
to it! If you’re not a native English speaker, “What’s wrong with you?” is angry, it’s
accusatory, right?
G: It's like saying, "UGH Why are you so messed up?” ♀R: “Why are you being like this? Omg.”
♂R: Aww, what’s wrong with you? G: So many things. So many things. And then
for us—he does this all the time, where like, even like last month he sent me a message
while he was at work. Like, oh, “Don’t plan anything tonight. I want to talk to you
about something.” And so immediately I was like, oh no! We’re going to have a huge
fight tonight. And so he gets back, and I’m you know, really nice, and I’m just like,
“Okay honey, what did you want to talk about?” He was like, “Oh, you know. Anything! I
just miss talking to you. Let’s talk about something!” And I was just like, are you
serious…? I have been freaking out all day. What are you doing?? Sorry, I love you.
♀R: No, Jun totally does that. He still does that sometimes, “I want to talk.”
It’s so serious! That’s such a serious phrase, especially if you have the word “need”
in there, like, “I need to talk to you.” It’s like you’re breaking up or something.
G: Or like, “I have serious problems. You need to wipe your feet more!” or something
like that. ♂R: Yeah, you have so many serious problems.
G: Wow, thank you honey. J: I’ll try to be careful about the words
I choose. ♀R: Thank you. What was our number 4?
G: What was our number 4? OH! People hitting on!
♀R: Oh, yeah! Maybe there’s also a cultural difference with how you flirt in Japan? Jun
is completely oblivious to flirting. And people say guys are like that everywhere, but…
G: He’s like REALLY oblivious. ♀R: Yeah, yeah. Jun doesn’t even know the signals
so he unintentionally flirts with people sometimes. Like, he’ll sit at a table-
J: That sounds horrible. ♀R: He knows now, because we talked about
it before, because I had to tell him, “You’re flirting with people.” He would like sit
at a table and like lean in while talking to someone and then drown out everyone else,
and like look at them in the eyes and talk to them. It’s like such a serious connection
there. J: I just want to let the other person know
that I’m listening to you. That’s all. G: You are a nice person. Don’t do that
with girls, though. ♀R: Right, and I think it’s also like,
the trying-to-understand-the-English thing. G: Ahh, gotcha.
♀R: Especially when girls are flirting with him, like if they get up close, like *GIGGLE*
you know, or put their hand on his arms, like, “Oh, you’re so silly teehee!”
G: Ryosuke doesn’t really notice when girls hit on him. I don’t know, I think he’s
really sexy so I’m a little bit biased. Especially when we were in America, since
he was studying abroad at my university, often other girls would invite him out to dinner,
or even just eating alone at the cafeteria or going to a movie. And him it’s like,
“Oh, yeah, sure! I’ll meet a new person!” And to me it’s like, “No, you’re not
eating alone with another girl who’s not me.” Especially if I don’t even know her.
That’s a little… ♀R: Dinner and a movie is a date.
G: That’s a date! G: I think he doesn’t really notice when
girls hit on him. To other people it’s really obvious, and he’s just like, “Oh, she’s
such a nice friend!” ♂R: Yeah, that’s how I see it. Sorry.
♀R: I’m glad you’re so excited about making friends.
♀R: It’s interesting we’ve had all these same experiences.
G: Yeah! And don’t get me wrong. I love my husband to death, even if he does weird
stuff. I think it’s entertaining. ♀R: It’s all interesting. It’s all a
new learning experience. G: Yeah!
♀R: And I mean, you have the same kind of stuff in a non-interracial relationship, where
there’re communication problems, too. But it’s fun being with someone from another
culture. There’s so much more to learn. You’re always learning something. It’s
always exciting. G: Yeah! And if you sat Ryosuke in front of
a camera and asked him all the problems he has with me because I’m American, trust
me. There would be a really long list. ♀R: Yeah.
J: Ryosuke, we have to make the guy’s version next time.
♂R: Ah! G: No! Don’t talk about my bad characteristics.
♀R: Yeah, let’s not do that. All right, well thanks for watching guys! I’m going
to link to her channel down in the description as well as her blog, so please go check that
out! G: Yay!
♀R: It’s really interesting. And like I said, she’s another American woman married
to a Japanese guy, which is always really exciting to meet here in Japan. I’m really
excited I got to meet you! G: Yeah! It was really fun! Thank you so much!
J: No, thank you so much. ♀R: Thanks for watching, guys!
Everyone: Bye!!
G: The first time his parents knew about me
was he skyped his parents and was like, “Oh, by the way, she’s going to come stay with
us for the summer, and I’m dating this girl named Grace!” like yaaay!
♂R: Yay! ♀R: Ours was like the same exact thing.
Jun wasn’t planning on telling his parents about us for a long time, after I had already
gone back to America after meeting him, I found really cheap tickets, like suddenly,
out of the blue, for Christmas vacation. It was only a week away and I was like, “Jun!
I’m going to come visit you!” And he was like, ‘I haven’t even… my parents…
I don’t know…” And so he told his parents literally a week before I went and stayed
with them for a month. So that was probably a bad way for me to meet my future in-laws…


4 Odd Things about Japanese Husbands ダーリンは日本人

27 分類 收藏
林宜悉 發佈於 2020 年 3 月 24 日
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