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  • It's easy to forget that while impeachment is going on,

  • Donald Trump is still in office pushing his agenda forward.

  • And you have to admit it's a kind of weird system.

  • He's being investigated for high crimes against the country,

  • but in the meantime, it's just like, yeah,

  • just keep doing your thing, it's all good.

  • Like, imagine if other jobs worked this way.

  • Just like, "Bill, we're pretty sure that you've been drinking

  • "and driving the school bus, but, uh, until we figure it out,

  • "you just keep popping those wheelies, man.

  • -(laughter) -We'll, uh, we'll let you know."

  • So while the trial continues,

  • Trump is still doing president stuff.

  • And at the top of his to-do list lately

  • is keeping people out of America--

  • starting with supersizing the travel ban.

  • President Trump is planning to widen

  • his controversial travel ban.

  • The plan will prohibit nearly all people

  • from seven countries.

  • Now, the new restrictions are expected to be announced

  • on Monday.

  • Our country has to be saved.

  • You see what's going on in the world.

  • Our country has to be saved.

  • So we have a very strong travel ban,

  • and we'll be adding a few countries to it.

  • Yes, Donald Trump is expanding his infamous travel ban.

  • And it looks like it's gonna be six countries

  • from Africa and Asia,

  • and one from Europe, just to throw people off the scent.

  • -(laughter) -You know? Yeah.

  • Trump's travel bans are like a reverse Oscars--

  • a bunch of brown nominees and then one token white one

  • -thrown in for diversity. -(laughter)

  • It's, like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

  • Now, I know, I know Trump's State Department claims

  • they're doing this to keep America safe.

  • But it is starting to feel like Trump really just wants to ban

  • the entire world, but he's doing it a few countries at a time,

  • just so he doesn't look crazy.

  • You know? It's almost the same way like how I treat the des...

  • the dessert at a buffet, you know?

  • Yeah, I'll just be like, "Yeah, I'll just have one of these.

  • "Yeah, and maybe some of these. Yeah, yeah.

  • "Oh, I didn't see there was cheesecake. There's cheesecake?

  • "Do you want... I've got-got-got to have the cheesecake?

  • Oh, I'll come back. I want... Rrr..."

  • Either way, the travel ban is about to get even broader.

  • While Trump is trying to stop people from moving here,

  • he's also preventing them from being born in America

  • in the first place.

  • The Trump administration issued new rules today

  • aimed at cracking down on so-called "birth tourism,"

  • when women travel here to give birth so their children

  • will automatically become U.S. citizens.

  • NEWSWOMAN: And it comes after President Trump has railed

  • against birthright citizenship.

  • ...you're a dictator who we hate and who's against us,

  • and that dictator has...

  • his wife... have a baby...

  • on American soil.

  • Congratulations, your son or daughter

  • is now an American citizen.

  • Does anybody think this makes sense?

  • Okay...

  • (laughter)

  • Why would a dictator want their child...

  • -(laughter) -to be born as an American?

  • What's the game plan?

  • What, just have the kid born here, become a U.S. citizen,

  • and then when the kid returns home, be like,

  • "I have an American hostage, and I have some demands!"

  • Like, "Dad, what are you doing?" "Shut up, infidel!"

  • -(laughter) -Now, now,

  • even though Trump's example is crazy, he's not wrong

  • about people abusing birthright citizenship.

  • Every year, thousands of rich foreign women

  • fly to America just to give birth

  • so the baby can be a U.S. citizen, and then they fly home.

  • And if you ask me, it's a good example

  • of the Constitution being behind the times, all right?

  • 'Cause back then, when they came up with birthright citizenship

  • no one was just flying in for the weekend.

  • Yeah. Back then, you were considered an explorer

  • if you went more than three towns over.

  • -(laughter) -Yeah, people in New York

  • were like, "Did you hear? James went to New Jersey,

  • -and he survived!" -(laughter)

  • So I get... I get wanting to limit birth tourism,

  • but the question is, how is Homeland Security

  • gonna determine who's coming in just to give birth?

  • 'Cause that could get pretty awkward at the airport.

  • The border agent is just gonna be like, "Hey!

  • "No pregnant women allowed.

  • "Oh, you're not pregnant? Okay, fine, you can come in,

  • but... take a spin class or something. Come on."

  • (laughter)

  • So maybe curbing birth tourism isn't the craziest idea.

  • But... Trump isn't just going after rich families.

  • No, he's also targeting the tired, huddled masses

  • yearning to breathe free.

  • The Trump administration has scored a victory

  • in its effort to place new restrictions

  • on legal immigration.

  • The Supreme Court has cleared the way for the government

  • to deny green cards to immigrants

  • if they sign up for public assistance, like food stamps

  • or Medicaid, or if they're considered likely to apply

  • for such assistance in the future.

  • Yeah. In other words, Trump wants to block poor people

  • from staying in America.

  • Which explains the updated inscription

  • on the Statue of Liberty: "Bitch, better have my money."

  • -(laughter) -And honestly, this is...

  • it is kind of depressing.

  • Because coming from nothing and building a life for yourself

  • is literally the American dream.

  • It's basically what the country was founded on.

  • Well, that and the freedom to get weird-ass haircuts.

  • But that mostly.

  • And the irony of this law is that Trump's own mother

  • arrived in America as a poor immigrant

  • with barely any money to her name.

  • So if these rules were in place when she came over,

  • she probably wouldn't... have been allowed to stay.

  • She would have been denied a visa and sent packing.

  • And then there would be no President Trump.

  • So I'm not saying the law is terrible.

  • -(laughter) -I'm just saying...

  • it's about a hundred years too late.

It's easy to forget that while impeachment is going on,

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特朗普推進他的排外主義議程|每日秀 (Trump Forwards His Xenophobic Agenda | The Daily Show)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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