Name: 斯克拉兄弟。養狗和養孩子不一樣 TBS的CONAN節目 (The Sklar Brothers: Raising A Dog Is Not Like Raising A Child - CONAN on TBS)
Uploaded: 2021-01-14T09:43:30.000Z
Duration: 5 min 49 s
Description: 【看影片學英語】數萬部 YouTube 影片，搭配英漢字典即點即查，輕鬆掌握單字發音與用法，長久累積看電影不必再看字幕。

We're in a great mood tonight cause we recently got recognized in Tulsa.

Walking down the street car sees this guy drives out right Next.

Looks to the two of us is like, get out of here.

Jews, You know, it just feels good to be recognized for your work is what we're trying to say.

He was, like, see later were like, Whoa, you, sir, could never do a straight arm way.

Good thing about having two kids is that if anybody has less than you and they complain about anything in their lives and you're around to hear it, you're allowed to walk over to him.

He did a 15 minutes said about how his 1 17 month old kid was ruining his life, how hard it was to raise 17 how difficult his life had become.

Now, Jan are the most supportive comedians ever committed to tell you they come on stage always like I love that it's a great job was attacked.

I just wrote a tag in his time Tagging jokes Don't even MAKE It Drags the tagging Porta.

This guy got off stage after doing a 15 minutes at about how his 1 17 month old kid was ruining his life.

Get out, Get out of comedy 1 17 month old kid.

You're a parent like an optometrist Is a doctor barely barely a pair.

I don't even know if he practices all gynecology.

Okay, if you don't know what a 17 month old kid is will explain it to you, right?

Then I love are friends that just have pets.

It can't handle that the pet is too overwhelming.

You're like, Hey, man, we're getting a drink after the show.

I got to get home and that, uh, it's my baby boy, baby, it's like race, like raising a kid.

We're like, Is it because if you can tie it up while you go have brunch, it's not a kid, Okay?

If you can pay good money to watch it fight another one to the death, it is okay if it runs away in two weeks later like let's just get another one and call it if you can openly masturbate in front of it.

It is not okay if it turns 15 and you're thinking about putting it to sleep.

That actually is a kid that is a horrible teenager.

As I said, I have two daughters, 12 and 14.

Those of their names, Yes, feud, stranger things.

You're ahead of the curve on that 1 14 She's in high school, and so before she went to high school this year, we cleaned out her bookshelves of all the books.

We used to read her when she was a little kid, and what I realized is the books we read our kids, when they're really little, are terrible.

But you don't care because you're just using the thing to put your kid to sleep, which is what a parent does of little kids all day long.

You're just trying to put your kids to slit her down, Get her down, put her down, put her down like she's a horse with a broken leg.

She just woke up 20 minutes ago, but her dad there was a whole shelf of fairy tales.

Now I don't read affair until recently, but those are wildly inappropriate stories for kids.

Oh yeah, they're crazy story crazy fairy tales read like police blotters in the state of Florida.

Yes, if you were to put the phrase of Florida man or a Florida woman in front of the plot of a fairy tale totally works.

Florida woman breaks into a house, eats their food, breaks a chair and then it's found passed out in the kid's bed.

Okay, Florida man kisses a dead woman than tries to marry her.

In Orlando, Florida, woman lures to Children to her house, using bread crumbs with hopes of eating their faces off.

And Pensacola, Florida woman gets a D u I for trying to drive a pumpkin that's everywhere Florida every weekend.

Although it is kind of fun to think of Cinderella as a Florida woman and to imagine her getting pulled over by the cops at 12.

Ma'am, Ma'am, we're gonna need you to get down from the down off the pumpkin.

She's like these masks were horses 10 minutes ago.

 Oh, yeah, the only prints in your future, man. 