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  • Here, let me, yummy, here you go, okay.

    來,張開你的小嘴巴。

  • Very nice!

    你好棒喔!

  • Your candy has been crushed, sir.

    哈,我根本是 Candy Crush 達人!

  • But luckily he kept his wits, and his purple crayon.

    不過幸運的是,他有聰明才智和紫色的蠟筆。

  • Ooh damn, dang, dang, dang, oh dang!

    喔超「屌」,帥,是帥,超帥,超厲害!

  • Here we go, okay, okay, we got my bag, baby bag, baby seat.

    好,要記得拿我的背包、寶寶背包、寶寶座椅。

  • - Bye Hun. - Wait, keys, wait, baby!

    - 再見,親愛的。- 等等,還有鑰匙和寶寶。

  • Okay, can't forget the baby.

    我怎麼能忘了寶寶。

  • - Hello! - Hey!

    - 哈囉!- 嘿!

  • How was your day?

    你今天過得如何?

  • Cheers!

    乾杯!

  • - Cheers! -Happy date night!

    -乾杯!-今晚約會愉快!

  • Have a good night!

    約會愉快!

  • Do you guys like Pitbull?

    你們喜歡 Pitbull?

  • We're all gonna be young forever, woo!

    我們都會永遠年輕!

  • Hey!

    嘿!

  • Hey, sorry, I just put the baby down.

    抱歉,我剛剛在處理寶寶的事。

  • Oh, thanks for the beer.

    謝謝你的啤酒。

  • Ah, I can't wait to have kids!

    我等不及要生個小寶寶了!

  • Mm, trust me, you can wait.

    呃...相信我,你可以等。

  • It all seems so magical, you know, when you see your baby smile for the first time, or walk...

    這一切是多麼的奇妙美好,當你第一次看見寶寶臉上的笑容、他第一次走路等等...

  • Yeah, or clean up a stage five poop blow out, that gets all over the changing table, which the dog then eats for some reason, because he likes eating poop.

    對,或者是清理滿是大便的尿布台,然後家裡的狗基於某種原因甚至會跑來吃寶寶的大便。

  • It's not that kinda dog.

    沒有這種狗吧...

  • And then he vomits that poop all over the couch, which you just cleaned baby vomit off of.

    接著,吃了大便的狗會吐得整座沙發都是,而你甚至剛清理完那座沙發上的寶寶嘔吐物。

  • And as much as you try and clean it, that couch will forever be known as the vomit couch.

    無論你清理得再多次,那座沙發永遠都會是個充滿嘔吐味的「噁爛沙發」。

  • Yeah, that sounds bad.

    聽起來有點糟。

  • Yeah.

    真的。

  • I don't know, I mean I wonder, when am I gonna be ready to have kids?

    我不知道欸,我一直在思考,我什麼時候才會準備好當個爸爸。

  • You're never ready, that's the thing.

    事實是,沒有準備好的那一天。

  • Really, not even like, at age 30?

    真的嗎,就算當我已經三十歲?

  • Yeah.

    對,沒錯。

  • Huh.

    好吧。

  • Are you guys sleeping much?

    有小孩之後,你們的睡眠時間是不是都不多?

  • Turns out the human body is incredibly resilient.

    我發現,人體的適應能力極強。

  • I don't even need much more then four hours of sleep.

    我甚至不需要睡滿四個小時。

  • You look exhausted.

    你看起來累壞了。

  • I know, I'm in denial.

    我知道,我只是不想面對事實。

  • Look, I get it, I mean I been waking up early too.

    老兄,我能懂你的心情,我最近天天都得早起!

  • I've been doing this 7 A.M. workout class.

    我早上七點必須去上健身課。

  • Oh, 7 A.M., wow.

    哇!早上七點,是吧?

  • You're such a martyr, oh my God, your life sounds so hard.

    你可真是個烈士,老天!你的生活聽起來也艱困了吧!

  • I mean, sometimes when I got out, I sleep in, but I find I can't sleep much past 10AM.

    有時候我晚上出去玩,隔天都會睡晚一點,但我發現只要超過早上十點,我就睡不著了。

  • I would literally only eat pineapple-pizza for the rest of my life if it meant I could sleep 'til 10 A.M.

    如果能讓我睡到早上十點,我願意下半輩子都只吃鳳梨口味的披薩。

  • Oh god.

    我的天啊!

  • Yeah.

    沒錯。

  • I hate pineapple-pizza.

    我恨死鳳梨口味的披薩。

  • And I love pizza.

    但我愛披薩。

  • You get me.

    你懂我。

  • It's tough, but it's worth it.

    照顧寶寶不是件簡單的事,但其實滿值得的。

  • Sounds like having a really cute puppy.

    聽起來就像在養隻可愛的小狗。

  • Cute doesn't even begin to describe it.

    「可愛」這一個詞甚至不足以形容。

  • Cute is like something you see in a photo, you know.

    你知道的,「可愛」是用來形容照片裡的人事物。

  • Plush toys, those are cute.

    就像毛絨玩具,很可愛沒錯。

  • Having a baby, it's, it's, sublime.

    但,照顧寶寶...可以說是件神聖的事情。

  • When I hold him, or rock him, or play with him, I'm filled with this impossibly vast love.

    當我把他抱在懷裡,輕輕搖著他,或是陪他玩,我可以感受到有股無限的愛充滿了我的心。

  • I don't know, it's like, you see the baby and for a moment, you get a glimpse of the mystery of life.

    當你看著寶寶,就彷彿看見了生命的奧妙。

  • Whenever I see him crawling around, or exploring things, I can tell he's just disovering the world and seeing 1,000 things every second.

    每一次看著他在地上爬行和發掘新事物,我都知道他正在探索這個未知的世界,而且他每一秒都發現了一千件新事物。

  • It's awesome.

    真的很美好。

  • Wow.

    哇!

  • Yeah.

    對啊!

  • Well, next rounds on me.

    下一杯酒,我請你。

  • More drinks?

    還要再來一杯嗎?

  • Yes, let's get another drink, let's stay out all night.

    好啊,再給我來一杯,我們不醉不歸。

  • Let's, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I should go.

    開玩笑的,我該回家了。

  • We've got squad crew-necks, we've got a baby onesie.

    我們推出了新版圓領上衣和寶寶連身衣。

  • We got a baby that's trying to escape.

    還有,一個正試圖要逃跑的寶寶。

  • - His hat! - Oh no!

    - 寶寶的帽子!- 喔不!

  • His hat, hats off to that!

    他的帽子掉了。

  • You can get it at TryGuys.com

    你可以在 TryGuys.com 買到這些衣服。

  • Get my bicep curls!

    做個二頭肌彎舉!

  • You know, as you grow older, Daddy's gonna have to just get stronger.

    當你越長越大,爸爸也需要變得更強壯才行。

Here, let me, yummy, here you go, okay.

來,張開你的小嘴巴。

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B2 中高級 中文 美國腔 寶寶 沙發 大便 披薩 鳳梨 背包

【家庭教育】新手爸媽淚推大喊太貼切!看看「生小孩前 vs. 生小孩後」生活一百八十度的大轉變! (Ned's Life Before Kids Vs. After Kids)

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    Annie Chien 發佈於 2019 年 10 月 07 日
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