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  • "No" doesn't feel so good.

    說「不」的感覺不是很好。

  • We feel a little uncomfortable.

    我們會感到不舒服。

  • We feel bad saying no.

    我們不喜歡說「不」。

  • "No" to something is "yes" to something else.

    「不」對某些事來說是肯定的。

  • And that's the first thing you need to think about to give yourself permission to say no.

    這是第一件你需要考慮的事情,就是允許自己拒絕。

  • My husband actually put a sticky note on my computer for about a year with the word "no" on it.

    我先生確實用貼了一張便利貼在我的電腦上,上面寫「不」,而且貼了大約一年。

  • And it really did give me permission to say no and to remember that that's allowed.

    這真的讓我學會說「不」,而且時常提醒我拒絕是被允許的。

  • So that's the first thing.

    所以這是第一件事。

  • Then you want to think about how to say no and how to say yes.

    然後你必須要思考如何拒絕和如何接受。

  • Because yes and no are never one-word answers.

    因為「是」和「否」從來都不是一個字的答案。

  • My favorite on the no side is "no, but...".

    我最喜歡的說法是「不,但是...」

  • "No, not this...not right now."

    「不,不是這個...不是現在。」

  • "No, but I could do this instead."

    「不,但我可以這樣做。」

  • "No, but this person might be interested."

    「不,但是這位可能會有興趣。」

  • I look to give a no with the opportunity for a yes later.

    我希望在拒絕之後可以給一個肯定的機會。

  • For example, somebody asked me to do a pro bono talk.

    舉個例子來說,有人希望我做免費諮詢。

  • Happy to do those things if they meet certain criteria.

    如果他們符合某些標準,我很樂意這麼做。

  • This criteria was driving two hours in rush hour to talk to 30 people.

    這個標準是在尖峰時刻裡開車兩小時,與三十個人交談。

  • It wasn't going to meet that criteria.

    但這不符合標準。

  • And I said, if you can get x number of people in the room, and we can do it during this time of day, then I'm happy to do it.

    而且我說如果你可以在這房間集合 x 位人,並且我們可以在這一天的這段時間完成,那我會很樂意這麼做。

  • So "No, but here's how you can get a yes" is a great way to enable somebody to feel OK and for you to feel OK and not want to avoid that extended relationship.

    所以「拒絕後但是你如何得到肯定」是一個好方式,可以讓他人和你感到舒服的情況,且避免發展成不好的關係。

  • So when we use a "no, but," we give them an opportunity for a "yes" down the road.

    當我們用「不,但是...」時,我們給他們另一個肯定的機會。

  • But we also can use the "no, but" to help them find another way to get that help.

    但我們也可以用「不,但是...」幫助他們找到另一個方式。

  • No, but there's this great resource you may want to look into.

    你可能會想研究「不,但是...」這個很棒的說法。

  • No, but I do know somebody who's working on that.

    「不,但是我知道有人正在研究那個。」

  • Let me ask if they might be interested in connecting.

    讓我問他們是否有興趣。

  • No, but.

    「不,但是」

  • I might not be able to help you.

    我可能無法幫助你。

  • But I'm happy to give you ideas on how you can get the help you're looking for.

    但我很樂意提供如何獲得你所需幫助的方法。

  • Sometimes you want to and get to say yes.

    有時候你想要說「好」。

  • So we want to sometimes qualify our yes: "Yes, if..."

    我們有時希望符合我們的要求「好,如果...」

  • "Yes, if you can get this done for me."

    「好,如果你能為我完成這件事情。」

  • Or "yes, if you can get this many people in the room."

    或是「好,如果你能讓這房間裡有很多人的話。」

  • Or "yes, if."

    「好,如果...」

  • It could be "yes, after."

    也可以是「好,之後...」

  • Yes, I'd love to get on the phone with you after I'm done with this big project that I'm working on, or after I get back from vacation.

    「好,我完成這個重要的計畫後或度假回來後,我會回撥電話給你。」

  • Just giving yourself a little breathing room in when and the timing of when that follow through will actually happen.

    在事情發生前,只是先給自己一點喘息的時間。

  • So we have "yes, if."

    所以我們現在有「好,如果...」

  • We have "yes, after."

    「好,之後...」

  • We could have "yes, with."

    我們還有「好,在...之下...」

  • "Yes, with your assistance."

    「好,在你的協助之下。」

  • Or "yes, with another party, I'm happy to work on that."

    或是「好,在另一個派對上,我很樂意這麼做。」

  • "Yes, with some training."

    「好,在某些訓練中。」

  • So "yes, if," "yes, after," "yes, with," or even "yes, when."

    所以「好,如果...」、「好,之後...」、「好,在...之下...」或是「好,當...」

  • And when could be, when I feel that I'm really ready to do that.

    可以用在當我覺得已經準備好去做的時候。

  • Yes, when I have gotten that training that we talked about.

    「好,當我接受我們曾說到的培訓時。」

  • "Yes, when."

    「好,當...」

  • So all of these things help give you a little bit of space and manage the expectations of the follow through of that yes.

    因此這些所有都可以幫助你提供一點空間和管理彼此的期望。

"No" doesn't feel so good.

說「不」的感覺不是很好。

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A1 初級 中文 美國腔 拒絕 標準 幫助 完成 說法 舒服

說 "不 "很難。這些溝通技巧讓它變得簡單。| 米歇爾-蒂利斯-萊德曼 (Saying no is hard. These communication tips make it easy. | Michelle Tillis Lederman)

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    Liang Chen 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
影片單字