Placeholder Image

字幕列表 影片播放

  • So, this happy pic of me was taken in 1999.

    我這張笑嘻嘻的照片 是 1999 年拍的,

  • I was a senior in college,

    我當時大學四年級,

  • and it was right after a dance practice.

    是在一個跳舞派對之後拍的。

  • I was really, really happy.

    我那時非常非常開心,

  • And I remember exactly where I was about a week and a half later.

    我還記得大約十天後我在哪兒。

  • I was sitting in the back of my used minivan

    我坐在我的二手箱型車後面,

  • in a campus parking lot,

    車停在校園的停車場裡。

  • when I decided

    那時我決定,

  • I was going to commit suicide.

    我要自殺,

  • I went from deciding to full-blown planning very quickly.

    下決定之後我很快就做好充分計畫,

  • And I came this close to the edge of the precipice.

    我離懸崖的邊緣只有這麼近。

  • It's the closest I've ever come.

    這是我最接近的一次,

  • And the only reason I took my finger off the trigger

    我沒有扣下扳機的唯一原因

  • was thanks to a few lucky coincidences.

    要感謝幾個幸運的巧合。

  • And after the fact,

    在那件事之後,

  • that's what scared me the most: the element of chance.

    最讓我受驚的是:運氣的元素。

  • So I became very methodical about testing different ways

    所以我開始有條理地測試不同方法,

  • that I could manage my ups and downs,

    試著管理我的起起落落,

  • which has proven to be a good investment. (Laughs)

    後來證明這是個值得的投資(笑聲)。

  • Many normal people might have, say, six to 10 major depressive episodes

    許多正常人一生會有 6 到 10 次

  • in their lives.

    憂鬱發作,

  • I have bipolar depression. It runs in my family.

    我有躁鬱症,是家庭遺傳。

  • I've had 50-plus at this point,

    我已經發作過 50 次以上了,

  • and I've learned a lot.

    我學到很多。

  • I've had a lot of at-bats,

    我有過很多的上壘打擊數,

  • many rounds in the ring with darkness,

    與黑暗在拳擊場上打過很多回合,

  • taking good notes.

    做了很多有用的筆記,

  • So I thought rather than get up and give any type of recipe for success

    所以我想,與其給大家成功妙方

  • or highlight reel,

    或精華影片,

  • I would share my recipe for avoiding self-destruction,

    我要分享的是避免自我毀滅的妙方。

  • and certainly self-paralysis.

    當然還有避免自我癱瘓,

  • And the tool I've found which has proven to be the most reliable safety net

    我找到的工具 被證明是在情緒自由落體時,

  • for emotional free fall

    最可靠的安全網,

  • is actually the same tool

    這個工具其實也就是

  • that has helped me to make my best business decisions.

    協助我做出最佳生意決策的工具,

  • But that is secondary.

    但那就是次要的了,

  • And it is ... stoicism.

    它就是……斯多葛主義。

  • That sounds boring.

    聽起來很無趣。

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • You might think of Spock,

    你可能會想到星際爭霸戰的史巴克,

  • or it might conjure and image like this --

    你也可能會想起這樣的畫面……

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • a cow standing in the rain.

    站在雨中的一頭牛,

  • It's not sad. It's not particularly happy.

    牠並不悲傷,牠並不特別快樂,

  • It's just an impassive creature taking whatever life sends its way.

    牠只是一隻無感覺的動物, 生活給牠什麼牠就接受什麼。

  • You might not think of the ultimate competitor, say, Bill Belichick,

    你可能不會想到偉大的競賽者 比如比爾貝利奇克,

  • head coach of the New England Patriots,

    他是新英格蘭愛國者的教頭,

  • who has the all-time NFL record for Super Bowl titles.

    他是問鼎國家美式足球聯盟 (NFL) 超級盃的記錄保持人,

  • And stoicism has spread like wildfire in the top of the NFL ranks

    過去幾年,斯多葛主義就像 野火一樣不斷擴散,

  • as a means of mental toughness training in the last few years.

    在 NFL 頂尖球隊中, 被當作精神強悍訓練的手段。

  • You might not think of the Founding Fathers --

    你可能不會想到開國始祖們,

  • Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, George Washington

    湯瑪士傑佛遜、 約翰亞當斯、喬治華盛頓,

  • to name but three students of stoicism.

    我只舉這三位 斯多葛主義的學生為例。

  • George Washington actually had a play about a Stoic --

    喬治華盛頓還有 一齣關於斯多葛主義的劇,

  • this was "Cato, a Tragedy" --

    叫做「卡托:一部悲劇」,

  • performed for his troops at Valley Forge to keep them motivated.

    在佛吉谷演出給他的士兵看, 以保持他們的積極。

  • So why would people of action focus so much on an ancient philosophy?

    所以為什麼行動家們 如此重視這古老的哲學?

  • This seems very academic.

    這似乎很學術,

  • I would encourage you to think about stoicism a little bit differently,

    我會鼓勵你用稍微 不同的方式來思考斯多葛主義,

  • as an operating system for thriving in high-stress environments,

    把它想成在高壓環境中 邁向成功的作業系統,

  • for making better decisions.

    用來做出更佳的決策。

  • And it all started here,

    一切的開始,是在這裡,

  • kind of,

    可以算是啦!

  • on a porch.

    在一個門廊,

  • So around 300 BC in Athens,

    在雅典,大約西元前 300 年,

  • someone named Zeno of Citium taught many lectures

    有個人叫做季蒂昂的芝諾, 他教導了很多課程,

  • walking around a painted porch, a "stoa."

    他在一個長廊上來回走著, 長廊稱為「stoa」,

  • That later became "stoicism."

    這個字之後演變成 「stoicism(斯多葛主義)。」

  • And in the Greco-Roman world,

    在希臘羅馬世界裡,

  • people used stoicism as a comprehensive system

    人們把斯多葛主義 當作是一種綜合系統,

  • for doing many, many things.

    做很多很多事情時都會用到,

  • But for our purposes, chief among them was training yourself

    但對我們,最主要的目的 就是訓練自我,

  • to separate what you can control from what you cannot control,

    把你能控制的和你無法控制的分開,

  • and then doing exercises to focus exclusively

    然後做一些練習, 讓你能完全只把焦點放在前者,

  • on the former.

    這會降低情緒反應,

  • This decreases emotional reactivity,

    可說是種超能力。

  • which can be a superpower.

    相反地,比如說你是個四分衛,

  • Conversely, let's say you're a quarterback.

    你漏接了一個傳球,你很氣你自己,

  • You miss a pass. You get furious with yourself.

    那可能會害你輸掉整場比賽。

  • That could cost you a game.

    比如你是總裁,你對一個 非常有價值的員工大發脾氣,

  • If you're a CEO, and you fly off the handle at a very valued employee

    原因只是他在一件小事違背了你,

  • because of a minor infraction,

    你可能就會失去這個員工。

  • that could cost you the employee.

    比如你是個大學生 且身處向下沉的螺旋當中,

  • If you're a college student who, say, is in a downward spiral,

    你感到無助、沒希望,

  • and you feel helpless and hopeless,

    結果可能是會讓你失去生命。

  • unabated, that could cost you your life.

    所以賭注是非常非常高的。

  • So the stakes are very, very high.

    在工具包中有許多工具 能讓你達到目的,

  • And there are many tools in the toolkit to get you there.

    我只打算強調一種,

  • I'm going to focus on one that completely changed my life in 2004.

    這工具在 2004 年 完全改變了我的人生。

  • It found me then because of two things:

    它那時會找到我,有兩個原因:

  • a very close friend, young guy, my age, died of pancreatic cancer unexpectedly,

    一個很親的朋友, 與我同年的年輕人,

  • and then my girlfriend, who I thought I was going to marry, walked out.

    未預期地因為胰臟癌過世,

  • She'd had enough, and she didn't give me a Dear John letter,

    以及我的女友, 我本來以為我們會結婚,

  • but she did give me this,

    但她離開了我,

  • a Dear John plaque.

    她受夠了,她沒有寫絕交信給我,

  • (Laughter)

    但她給了我這個,

  • I'm not making this up. I've kept it.

    一張絕交飾板。

  • "Business hours are over at five o'clock."

    (笑聲)

  • She gave this to me to put on my desk for personal health,

    這不是我編出來的,我還留著它,

  • because at the time, I was working on my first real business.

    「上班時間到五點為止。」

  • I had no idea what I was doing. I was working 14-plus hour days,

    她給我這個,讓我放在書桌上, 為了我個人健康著想,

  • seven days a week.

    因為那時,我在努力打拼我 第一個真正的事業,

  • I was using stimulants to get going.

    我不知道我在幹什麼 我一天工作超過 14 小時,

  • I was using depressants to wind down and go to sleep.

    一週工作七天。

  • It was a disaster.

    我要靠興奮劑來維持,

  • I felt completely trapped.

    我要吃鎮靜劑來放鬆下來和入睡,

  • I bought a book on simplicity to try to find answers.

    那是個災難。

  • And I did find a quote that made a big difference in my life,

    我感覺自己完全被困住了,

  • which was, "We suffer more often in imagination than in reality,"

    我買了一本關於「簡單」的書 試圖找出答案。

  • by Seneca the Younger,

    我的確在書中找到一句話 在我的人生中造成很大的不同,

  • who was a famous Stoic writer.

    那句話就是:

  • That took me to his letters,

    「我們在想像中所受的苦 比在現實中還多」,

  • which took me to the exercise,

    塞內卡說的。

  • "premeditatio malorum,"

    他是個知名的斯多葛學派作家,

  • which means the pre-meditation of evils.

    那句話引導我去讀他的信,

  • In simple terms,

    他的信引導我去練習,

  • this is visualizing the worst-case scenarios, in detail, that you fear,

    「premeditatio malorum」

  • preventing you from taking action,

    意思是:對邪惡的事先冥思。

  • so that you can take action to overcome that paralysis.

    簡單來說,

  • My problem was monkey mind -- super loud, very incessant.

    是將你害怕的、 會讓你不採取行動的最糟情況,

  • Just thinking my way through problems doesn't work.

    做細節的視覺化想像,

  • I needed to capture my thoughts on paper.

    讓你能夠採取行動來克服那癱瘓,

  • So I created a written exercise

    我的問題是心猿意馬── 它非常大聲、持續不斷,

  • that I called "fear-setting," like goal-setting,

    光是想著我要如何渡過問題 對我來說是沒用的。

  • for myself.

    我需要把我的思路寫在紙上,

  • It consists of three pages.

    所以我創造了一個書寫練習,

  • Super simple.

    稱為「恐懼設定」, 就像目標設定一樣,

  • The first page is right here.

    為我自己而做,

  • "What if I ...?"

    它包含了三頁,

  • This is whatever you fear,

    超簡單。

  • whatever is causing you anxiety,

    第一頁就在這裡,

  • whatever you're putting off.

    「如果我……會如何?」

  • It could be asking someone out,

    指的是你懼怕的任何事,

  • ending a relationship,

    造成你焦慮的事,

  • asking for a promotion, quitting a job, starting a company.

    你在拖延的事,

  • It could be anything.

    有可能是開口約某個人出去,

  • For me, it was taking my first vacation in four years

    結束一段戀情,

  • and stepping away from my business for a month to go to London,

    要求升官、辭掉工作、 創立一間公司,

  • where I could stay in a friend's room for free,

    可能是任何事。

  • to either remove myself as a bottleneck in the business

    對我而言是去渡假 我四年都沒做過這件事,

  • or shut it down.

    去倫敦,離開我的事業一個月,

  • In the first column, "Define,"

    在那兒我可以免費住在一個朋友家,

  • you're writing down all of the worst things you can imagine happening

    我可以把我自己這個瓶頸 從事業中移除

  • if you take that step.

    或是停業。

  • You want 10 to 20.

    第一欄,「定義」,

  • I won't go through all of them, but I'll give you two examples.

    你要寫下的是,如果踏出那一步,

  • One was, I'll go to London, it'll be rainy, I'll get depressed,

    你能想像出所有 可能會發生的最糟事情,

  • the whole thing will be a huge waste of time.

    你應該要寫 10 到 20 項,

  • Number two, I'll miss a letter from the IRS,

    我不打算全部討論, 但我會舉兩個例子,

  • and I'll get audited

    其一是:我會去倫敦, 那兒常下雨,所以我會很沮喪,

  • or raided or shut down or some such.

    整件事會是在浪費時間。

  • And then you go to the "Prevent" column.

    第二:我會錯過來自國稅局的信,

  • In that column, you write down the answer to:

    然後我會被稽查

  • What could I do to prevent each of these bullets from happening,

    或被突襲檢查、或被關閉等等。

  • or, at the very least, decrease the likelihood even a little bit?

    接著就要到「預防」那一欄。

  • So for getting depressed in London,

    在那一欄,你要寫下的是,

  • I could take a portable blue light with me

    我能做什麼來預防這每一件事發生,

  • and use it for 15 minutes in the morning.

    或是至少把發生的可能性降低一點?

  • I knew that helped stave off depressive episodes.

    所以,針對在倫敦感到沮喪這一項,

  • For the IRS bit, I could change the mailing address on file with the IRS

    我可以隨身帶著可攜式藍光,

  • so the paperwork would go to my accountant

    早上用 15 分鐘,

  • instead of to my UPS address.

    我知道那能協助防止憂鬱發作。

  • Easy-peasy.

    針對國稅局一事 我可以向他們提出更改郵寄地址,

  • Then we go to "Repair."

    文書就會被寄給我的會計,

  • So if the worst-case scenarios happen,

    而不是我自己的美國郵政地址。

  • what could you do to repair the damage even a little bit,

    輕而易舉。

  • or who could you ask for help?

    接著下一欄是「修復」,

  • So in the first case, London,

    如果最糟的情況發生了,

  • well, I could fork over some money, fly to Spain, get some sun --

    你能做什麼來稍微 修復造成的損害?

  • undo the damage, if I got into a funk.

    或是你能向誰求助?

  • In the case of missing a letter from the IRS,

    所以,在倫敦的例子中,

  • I could call a friend who is a lawyer

    我可以不情願地多花點錢 飛到西班牙,曬曬太陽,

  • or ask, say, a professor of law

    如果我感到懼怕, 這樣可以將損害給消除。

  • what they would recommend,

    在錯失國稅局信件的例子中,

  • who I should talk to, how had people handled this in the past.

    我可以打電話給律師朋友,

  • So one question to keep in mind as you're doing this first page is:

    或是比如問法律教授,

  • Has anyone else in the history of time

    看他們有什麼建議,

  • less intelligent or less driven

    我該去找誰談, 過去人們如何處理這種問題。

  • figured this out?

    所以,在做第一頁的時候 有一件事要銘記在心,

  • Chances are, the answer is "Yes."

    在過去歷史上有沒有

  • (Laughter)

    沒你聰明、沒你那麼有動機的人

  • The second page is simple:

    找出過答案?

  • What might be the benefits of an attempt or a partial success?

    很可能,是有的。

  • You can see we're playing up the fears

    (笑聲)

  • and really taking a conservative look at the upside.

    第二頁很簡單,

  • So if you attempted whatever you're considering,

    如果去嘗試或是達成部分成功 會有什麼益處?

  • might you build confidence, develop skills,

    你可以看得出來, 我們在過度強調恐懼,

  • emotionally, financially, otherwise?

    用保守的視角來看好的一面,

  • What might be the benefits of, say, a base hit?

    所以如果你試著 去做你在考慮要做的事,

  • Spend 10 to 15 minutes on this.

    你是否可能會建立信心, 發展出技能,

  • Page three.

    不論是情緒上、財務上或其他?

  • This might be the most important, so don't skip it:

    如果擊出二三壘安打或全壘打 會有什麼好處?

  • "The Cost of Inaction."

    在這裡花個 10 到 15 分鐘。

  • Humans are very good at considering what might go wrong

    第三頁,

  • if we try something new, say, ask for a raise.

    這可能是最重要的, 所以不要跳過它,

  • What we don't often consider is the atrocious cost of the status quo --

    「不行動的代價」,

  • not changing anything.

    人類非常擅長去思考哪兒可能出錯,

  • So you should ask yourself,

    如果我們試點新東西, 比如,要求加薪,

  • if I avoid this action or decision

    我們通常不會去思考的是 維持現狀的代價有多糟,

  • and actions and decisions like it,

    不改變任何事的代價。

  • what might my life look like in, say, six months, 12 months, three years?

    所以你應該問問自己,

  • Any further out, it starts to seem intangible.

    如果我避開不做這個行動或決策,

  • And really get detailed -- again, emotionally, financially,

    以及類似的行動和決策,

  • physically, whatever.

    6 個月、12 個月、3 年之後 我的人生會是什麼樣子?

  • And when I did this, it painted a terrifying picture.

    再遠的話可能就會太難確定了。

  • I was self-medicating,

    真正去想細節, 不論是情緒上、財務上,

  • my business was going to implode at any moment at all times,

    身體上……都可以。

  • if I didn't step away.

    當我這麼做的時候 產生了一個很嚇人的畫面,

  • My relationships were fraying or failing.

    我在自我治療,

  • And I realized that inaction was no longer an option for me.

    隨時,我的事業都有可能內爆,

  • Those are the three pages. That's it. That's fear-setting.

    如果我不退開的話,

  • And after this, I realized that on a scale of one to 10,

    我的戀情在磨損或走向失敗,

  • one being minimal impact, 10 being maximal impact,

    我了解到,我不能選擇不行動,

  • if I took the trip, I was risking

    三頁就是這樣而已, 那就是恐懼設定。

  • a one to three of temporary and reversible pain

    這之後,我了解到 若評分 1 到 10 分,

  • for an eight to 10 of positive, life-changing impact

    1 分表示影響最小 10 分表示影響最大,

  • that could be a semi-permanent.

    如果我選擇旅行,我冒的風險

  • So I took the trip.

    是 1 到 3 分的暫時性痛苦, 且它是可反轉的,

  • None of the disasters came to pass.

    但有著 8 到 10 分的 改變人生式影響,

  • There were some hiccups, sure.

    這影響可能是半永久性的,

  • I was able to extricate myself from the business.

    所以我選擇去旅行了。

  • I ended up extending that trip for a year and a half around the world,

    那些災難都沒發生,

  • and that became the basis for my first book,

    當然有一些小問題沒錯,

  • that leads me here today.

    我得以讓自己從事業中解脫,

  • And I can trace all of my biggest wins

    我最後把它延長為 一年半的世界之旅,

  • and all of my biggest disasters averted

    那成了我第一本書的基礎,

  • back to doing fear-setting

    引導我今天到這裡。

  • at least once a quarter.

    針對我所有的大成功 以及避開的大災難,

  • It's not a panacea.

    我都可以追溯回

  • You'll find that some of your fears are very well-founded.

    我做的恐懼設定,

  • (Laughter)

    至少一季做一次。

  • But you shouldn't conclude that

    它不是萬靈丹,

  • without first putting them under a microscope.

    你會發現你的恐懼中 有些的確有很好的根基。

  • And it doesn't make all the hard times, the hard choices, easy,

    (笑聲)

  • but it can make a lot of them easier.

    但你還沒用顯微鏡觀看它們之前,

  • I'd like to close with a profile of one of my favorite modern-day Stoics.

    不該先下這樣的結論,

  • This is Jerzy Gregorek.

    而且它不會讓難熬的時刻 或困難的選擇全都變得輕鬆容易,

  • He is a four-time world champion in Olympic weightlifting,

    但會讓當中許多都變得 比較輕鬆容易些,

  • political refugee,

    我想用我最喜歡的 現代斯多葛主義者來作結。

  • published poet,

    這是傑西葛雷哥雷克,