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  • You know what i like about you besides

    你們知道除了因為你們愛我以外 我為什麼愛你們嗎?

  • the fact thatyou like me? I like that when I

    [笑聲] 我喜歡當我走出來時

  • walk out here you're all in the seats

    你們都在你們應該在的座位上

  • that you're supposed to be in. Sometimes

    有時當你們拍手時可能會移動幾個位子

  • when you clap you move over a few seats

    但結束後你們很快就會回到原本的座位了

  • but then you end up back in the seat you're

    這對你們很簡單

  • supposed to be in, and it's easy for you

    但對於我的某些員工這似乎不那麼簡單

  • but it's not an easy for some people on

    在我週末回顧艾倫秀的時候 我注意到了一件事

  • my staff. I was watching the show this

    其實發生的當天我就有注意到

  • weekend, and I noticed something.

    但我沒有想過它會真正出現在螢幕上

  • Well, I noticed that the day that it

    不過 這就是我看到的

  • happened but I didn't think they would

    >>現在她來了 >>艾倫·狄珍妮!

  • actually be on television but this is

    [掌聲及歡呼聲]

  • what I watched. >>Here she is now. Ellen Degeneres!

    好的 我不知道你們有沒有注意到那個陰影部分

  • Alright, I don't know if you saw the

    讓我們再更清楚的看一次陰影部分

  • shadowy part. Let's watch it again and

    >>現在她來了 >>艾倫·狄珍妮!

  • just watch that little shadowy party. >>Here she is now. Ellen Degeneres!

    [笑聲]

  • So that's Andy Lassner that he has been

    所以那是Andy Lassner

  • repeatedly repeatedly told not to get

    他已經被重複 重複的告知不要靠近我

  • that close to me

    [笑聲]

  • Andy Lassner is one of my executive producers

    Andy Lassner是我的執行製作人的其中一位

  • the same Andy Lassner who accidentally turned

    也是那個意外把攝影棚所有電源關閉 而使節目延滯兩個小時的Andy

  • off all of the electricity in the studio

    對吧?

  • shutting down the entire show for about

    大約是兩個小時左右吧

  • two hours, right? It was like, two hours or

    >>的確是很長一段時間

  • something like that. >>It was a long time.

    艾莉西亞·凱斯已經在等待表演開始了

  • Alicia Keys was waiting to perform but

    但整個攝影棚都停電了

  • there was no power. He had accidently

    原因是他曾意外的靠在開關上

  • leaned against the switch

    [笑聲]

  • Same Andy Lassner who can't say balls

    也是那個沒有辦法在說球這個字的時候 不笑出來的Andy(註一)

  • without giggling. Same Andy Lassner who

    [笑聲]

  • went to a haunted house and used his

    也是那個在鬼屋裡把助理當作人形盾牌的Andy

  • assistant as a human shield

    [笑聲及掌聲]

  • so you think with the word executive

    所以你知道你職位中的「執行」兩個字

  • in your title, you'd know when the show

    代表的是你知道艾倫秀開始的時間吧?

  • starting right? You're wearing a headset

    你帶著耳麥

  • they're counting down Maybe because you're

    聽著他們倒數

  • new. How long have you been here Andy?

    或許是因為你是新來的吧

  • >>14 years, Ellen. 14 years.

    Andy 你在這裡工作多久了?

  • All right. So i wanna

    [笑聲]

  • make sure you're not wandering around

    >>14年 艾倫

  • anymore, so I picked a, I went to PetSmart

    14年 [笑聲]

  • I picked something up

    好吧

  • Zenor, let's put that around him.

    所以我想要確保你不會再到處亂晃

  • There you go. Make sure you have water.

    所以我去Petsmart幫你挑了一些東西

  • You know what? I love you so much, Andy.

    Zenor 把東西放到他四周吧

  • I really, I love you so much. Just, just

    [笑聲]

  • being you makes me happy

    >>哇

  • It looks like one of those things, when you play badminton those things,

    請便 確認一下你有沒有水

  • what are they called, like a shuttlecock?

    [笑聲]

  • Andy, what's it called?

    你知道嗎? Andy 我真的很愛你

  • >>[LAUGH] >>Shuttlecock [LAUGH]

    真的 我很愛你

  • >>Sir, have you ever had a flu shot before?

    光是做你自己就讓我很開心了

  • I have never met a flu shot.

    [音樂]

  • >>Okay, well I have to give you this. >>Is this real?

    他看起來像是打羽球的時候會看到的一個東西

  • Yep.

    那叫什麼..像是羽球毛之類的嗎?(註二)

  • >>Okay. >>It's not a real needle.

    Andy 那叫什麼?

  • >>Oh!

    [笑聲] >>羽..羽毛球 [笑聲]

  • >>Hold still.

    >>先生, 您打過流感疫苗嗎?

  • >>Or is this almost done?

    >>我從沒打過流感疫苗

  • >>Aah!

    >>好的,那我必須將這個給您 >>這是真的嗎?

  • >>Wow, go, go, go, keep moving, keep moving, they can't get you if you move.

    是的 >>是

  • >>Oh my gos, my god, my god, Aah!

    >>好的 >>那不是真的針吧

  • >>What about a little hot wax?

    >>噢!

  • Yes, hot wax- >>On Andy. Let's do some hot wax.

    [笑聲] >>不要動

  • >>It's not gonna hurt.

    >>快結束了嗎?

  • >>No, it's not hot.

    >>啊!

  • >>Pick your person up. >>Oh no.

    >>走走走 繼續走 繼續走!

  • >>Tuck your chin in, okay?

    >>要一直移動他們才不會抓到你

  • >>Okay.

    >>天啊天啊天啊 啊!

  • >>[Bleep] Stop.

    [笑聲]

  • Well, I do love you. I really do.

    >>來一點熱蠟如何?

  • >>I love you, too.

    是!熱蠟!

You know what i like about you besides

你們知道除了因為你們愛我以外 我為什麼愛你們嗎?

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【艾倫秀】艾倫送資深奇葩員工一個狗籠 (The Ellen Show |Andy Lassner)

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    nunu690 發佈於 2017 年 10 月 12 日
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