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Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you’re watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business
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and life you love.
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If you’ve ever wondered how to find purpose and strength in an uncertain world, this one’s
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for you.
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Today’s question comes from R and she writes:
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“Hi Marie.
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Thank you for the wisdom you offer.
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It’s been such a great help for me.
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I’ve been through a series of traumatic events and suffer from depression.
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I live in Iraq and my country has been in war for decades.
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I’m an architect and love my job, but here everything you care about or build can be
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destroyed at any moment, that’s if you manage to survive.
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So here’s my Q: how can I find the courage to continue building knowing all my hard work
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can be wiped away due to circumstances I can’t control?
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Loving what I do for a living has become a kind of cure to me.
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I know you say everything is figureoutable, and I profoundly share this belief with you,
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but it’s so hard to do on my own.
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Thanks for giving me a chance to get help for myself and whoever is going through a
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similar situation.
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Lots of love to you and your team, R.”
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R, thank you so much for reaching out.
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Your words went straight to my heart.
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We have viewers in 195 countries and I do my very best to stay conscious of the fact
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that many people like you are living in conflict zones amidst extraordinary challenges.
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You know, right now I’m in New York and it’s hard to fathom the fear and turmoil
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and uncertainty that you experience on a daily basis.
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My heart goes out to you and I want you to know that we are sending you love and my hope
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is that something we share today can help you feel supported and find a sense of strength.
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You mentioned something really, really important when you talked about finding the courage
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in the midst of circumstances you can’t control.
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That’s the operative phrase: circumstances you can’t control.
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You’re living an amplified version of that, but you’re 100% right.
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For all of us, so much of what happens in life is completely beyond our control and
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that can leave us feeling powerless.
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But here’s the good news, there’s one thing that we have just a smidgen of control
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over and that’s ourselves and how we choose to direct our thoughts and our words and our
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actions.
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Keeping this in mind, when I read your question there were two key habits that I wanted to
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recommend for you.
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Both of these can be done anywhere, they don't cost anything, and they’re both scientifically
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proven to help improve depression and anxiety and the impact of trauma.
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Habit number one, daily meditation.
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So meditation is the ultimate technology for creating peace from the inside out.
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For me it’s what helps me stay connected to the loving and strong parts of myself and
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observe my circumstances without getting swept away by them.
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Now, we’ve done a whole episode on this one already, which includes a free 10 minute
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guided meditation made by me.
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So if you’re willing, I invite you to watch that episode and meditate for at least 10
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minutes a day for the next seven days.
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And then I want you to write to me at info@marieforleo.com and let me know what, if any, impact it’s
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made.
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Habit number two is movement.
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Now, what’s tough about this one is that when we feel depressed or we’re under extreme
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mental anxiety, we don't feel motivated to do much of anything besides maybe eating some
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chips or, in my case, you’re really craving some mac and cheese.
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However, exercise is scientifically proven to be especially effective for depression.
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You don't even have to get fancy, you don't have to go to a gym, you could run or you
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could work out in your house.
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You know, there are a ton of free videos on YouTube that just use your bodyweight so you
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don't even need any equipment.
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Now, I will say, for me it’s not just about exercise, but it’s also about the music
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that I listen to while I exercise that I feel makes the biggest difference.
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So my challenge to you is that for the next seven days in the morning if you could do
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just 10 minutes of exercise to music you love, I think it would make a big difference.
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Now, if you wind up doing more than 10 minutes that’s fantastic, but at least 10 minutes
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every day for the next seven days.
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And, again, I would love you to write me and let me know how it goes.
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So, R, those are two non-negotiable habits that I strongly recommend you give a try.
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But now I want to move on to the core of your question which is how much you love being
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an architect and building things but that understandably it all feels futile.
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I have to tell you, R, I’ve had similar thoughts not tied to the nature of my circumstance,
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but tied to the very nature of life itself which is impermanence.
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That inescapable fact that nothing in the physical plane lasts.
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I mean, everything, including you and me, including everything we make and everyone
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that we love, will one day be gone.
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And when I think about this I can either let that fact get me down or I can let that fact
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get me fired up, meaning fired up to love as much as I can possibly love while I’m
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still here.
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Fired up to take risks and to speak out and create things for as long as I possibly can.
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And the one thing that might be really inspiring for you on this topic is something called
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The 10 Paradoxical Commandments, which is by Dr. Kent Keith, which also really inspired
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Mother Teresa.
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Here are just three of them, and the third one is especially for you.
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People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
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Love them anyway.
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If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
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Do good anyway.
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What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
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Build anyway.
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Look R, you are on the planet for a reason.
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You are here to create and contribute.
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And the things that you build and the love that you bring to them, that is your legacy.
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As Khalil Gibran said, work is love made visible.
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And that, my friend, cannot be wiped away.
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So let’s wrap up this episode on a tweetable.
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Nothing physical lasts forever, but the legacy you create is here to stay.
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That was my A to your Q, R. I really hope it helps.
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And now I would love to hear from you, we’ve got a two-parter today.
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First up, R shared that she was feeling like she has to figure all of this out on her own,
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so I would love our community to get together and share some encouragement and support with
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her in the comments and let her know she is not alone.
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Second part, have you ever found yourself feeling like it’s futile to create something?
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Whether you're afraid it could all be taken away or you’re afraid no one’s going to
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see it or appreciate it or that it won’t be any good?
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What shift in your thinking has helped you?
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Now, as always, the best conversations happen after the episode over at MarieForleo.com,
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so go over there and leave a comment now.
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Once you’re there, be sure to subscribe to our email list and become an MF insider.
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You’ll get instant access to a fantastic audio we created called How to Get Anything
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You Want.
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You’ll also get some exclusive content and special giveaways and personal updates from
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me that I just don't share anywhere else.
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Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world really needs that
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special gift that only you have.
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Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.
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Ready to find your voice and sell with heart?
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We’ll show you how.
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Get started now with our free writing class at TheCopyCure.com.
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Side effects include enlarged profits.
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People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
-
Love them anyway.
-
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
-
Do good anyway.
-
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
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Build anyway.