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  • Hey guys!

    嘿!各位!

  • So I know every year around the same time,

    我知道每年大約在同一時間

  • when it gets closer and closer to Valentine's Day,

    越來越接近情人節的時候

  • I always make the same type of video where I'm kinda like,

    我總是在做同樣或接近這類型的影片

  • Not really making fun of romance,

    不是真的在開浪漫玩笑

  • but kinda like clowning on the fact that how exaggerated romance is

    但有點像那種小丑去誇大浪漫這件事

  • In like entertainment and movies and all that kinda stuff.

    像是一些娛樂還有電影會做的這類東西

  • I'm not like really making fun of romance,

    我不是真的在開浪漫玩笑

  • I'm just kinda dissing on the whole cliches

    我只是有點鄙視這些陳腔濫調

  • and romantic scenes that happen in movies.

    還有電影裡發生的那些浪漫場景

  • It's kinda become a tradition, in a way.

    因為這種現象在某種程度上有點變成傳統了

  • Well this year, I had a little change of heart.

    今年,我心態上有一點改變了

  • * Shows the heart of change, DUN DUN DUN! *

    (註:Change有「改變」和「零錢」的說法)

  • Get it? 'Cause it's like made of spare change- oh!

    懂嗎?因為這就用多餘的零錢做的...

  • And also I'm gonna keep the tradition going so let's go!

    然後我也想要保持這個傳統,所以開始吧!

  • Romantic Clichés

    浪漫的陳腔濫調

  • In real life...

    在真實的世界中...

  • Breakfast in bed

    床上早餐

  • [Romantic music]

  • Babe, babe wake up.

    寶貝,寶貝起床了

  • What is all of this?

    這些是什麼?

  • It's breakfast in bed.

    這是床上早餐

  • Aw, they're beautiful..

    哇~這花好美呀~

  • It's all your favorites, right?

    這些都是你喜歡的,對吧?

  • Thank you

    謝謝

  • Mhmm, it's so good

    恩~~好好吃!

  • Anything else you need?

    你還需要什麼嗎?

  • Maybe just a little salt

    大概需要一點鹽吧

  • Babe wake up.

    寶貝,起床了

  • Babe wake up..!

    寶貝,起床了...!

  • Babe!

    寶貝!

  • Wake up.

    起床了!

  • What are you doing?

    你要幹麻?

  • Oh good, you're awake

    哦好,你醒了

  • Um...

    恩...

  • What is this?

    這是什麼?

  • Breakfast in bed

    床上早餐

  • Here you go

    拿去吧

  • Can't we just eat in the-?

    我們不能去廚房吃嗎...?

  • Sorry - Wow

    抱歉

  • Make room for thi-

    哇...!

  • Got you some flowers to-

    給你一些花...

  • Oh my gosh!

    噢老天!

  • Oh gosh---Oh!

    噢老天!

  • Oh!

    噢!

  • I think um... Sorry

    恩... 抱歉...

  • -Yeah okay, -Hold on

    -嗯嗯... -等一下

  • Thanks

    謝謝...

  • That's--That's everything

    這... 這就是全部了

  • So...

    所以...!

  • Voila

    來囉!

  • Dig in,

    開動吧

  • Its all my favorites, right?

    這些都是我喜歡的,對吧?

  • Yeah...

    恩....

  • Wow...

    哇....

  • So? What do you think?

    所以,你覺得怎麼樣?

  • I mean... I guess it could use a little sal--

    我的意思是...我想它可以用點鹽...

  • Oh my gosh! You're getting salt everywhere!

    天啊! 你撒的鹽到處都是!

  • Oh no, that's not salt. Remember? We ran out

    噢不,那不是鹽,記得嗎? 我們用完了

  • What?

    蛤?

  • What are you doing?

    你在幹麻?

  • No! Is that?!?

    不!該不會...!

  • It's Dandruff BAE <3

    是頭皮屑,寶貝

  • The "Sexy Work Visit"

    性感的工作拜訪

  • Perfect,

    完美!

  • Uhh, hold on one second.

    恩... 等我一下!

  • I'm on the phone right now!

    我正在講電話

  • Uh, sorry about that.

    恩,抱歉!

  • So yeah,I-I will.....

    恩,對,我...

  • Phew, you got to be kidding me.

    哎,你在開玩笑吧...

  • [Sexy music ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)]

  • You know what, I'm gonna have to- I'm gonna have to call you back.

    呃... 我等等打電話給你

  • I can come back later..

    我可以晚一點再過來

  • No!N-n-no I'm..totally free right now.

    不...不不不,我現在非常有空

  • That's what I though

    我也這麼想

  • ummm...

    恩...

  • I...

    我...

  • (Derp face lol)

  • I'm... I'm on the phone right now

    我... 我正在講電話

  • so you could please come back

    所以你過來吧

  • Ohhh.. you've got to be kidding me.

    噢... 你在開玩笑吧...

  • oh, you know I'm gonna have to call you back

    噢,我等等打電話給你

  • I'm so sorry just my stupid wife

    抱歉,是我愚蠢的老婆來了

  • Hi Honey

    嗨,甜心

  • [sigh]

  • I can come back later...

    我可以晚一點再過來

  • PLEASE come back later

    拜託!晚一點再過來!

  • I have so much work to do!

    我還有好多工作要做!

  • Still working?

    還在工作?

  • YES!

    對!

  • I have so much to do!

    我還有好多工作要做!

  • Ok, you still working?

    嗯嗯~你還在工作?

  • What the *bleep*

    搞X啊?

  • What?

    什麼?

  • You just broke my computer!

    你剛摔壞了我的電腦!

  • All my clients on there!

    我的客戶資料都在裡面!

  • I'm gonna get fired now

    我要被解雇了!

  • Babe... I'm sure we would be just fine...

    寶貝...我相信我們會很好的...

  • [Homeless&Hungry] PLEASE HELP

    飢餓又無家可歸 請幫幫忙

  • [The Surprise]

    驚喜

  • OK, be careful. Just sit right here

    恩,小心,就坐在這裡

  • Right here?

    這裡嗎?

  • Uh huh.

    嗯嗯!

  • Sit....

    坐!

  • Hey...

    嘿...

  • No peeking....

    不要偷看

  • I'm not! I can't see anything

    我沒有,我什麼都看不到

  • What am I getting?

    我會得到什麼?

  • What did I do to deserve this gift?

    我做了什麼要給我禮物?

  • It's not even my birthday!

    我生日也還沒到啊?

  • You'll see...

    你會知道的...

  • k..

    好吧...

  • *Camera beep*

  • Ok

  • Alright..

    是的

  • Open your eyes..

    張開你的眼睛

  • -You can take it off now. -Take it off?

    - 你現在可以脫掉眼罩了 - 可以脫了?

  • Yes! *Nervous laugh*

    是的!

  • *Laughs all around*

  • no.. So I'm going to be a dad?

    噢!所以我要當爸了?

  • I'm going to be a dad!

    我要當爸了!

  • Open your eyes..

    張開你的眼睛

  • -You can take it off now. -Take it off?

    - 你現在可以脫掉了 - 可以脫了?

  • What is this?

    這是什麼?

  • Are you-Are you pregnant?

    妳...妳懷孕了?

  • Yes!

    是的

  • Oh my god (it's baby Ryden)

    噢老天啊!

  • I know

    我知道

  • OH MY GOD

    噢老天

  • What are we gonna do?

    我們該怎麼辦?

  • What?

    什麼?

  • We can't even afford rent

    我們甚至還無法負擔房租

  • How did you even afford this?

    你怎麼負擔得起這個?

  • How are we supposed to afford diapers and toys and-

    我們要如何負擔得起尿布、玩具和...

  • Babe!

    寶貝!

  • Calm down!

    冷靜!

  • Seriously

    說真的

  • Everything is gonna be just fin-

  • (Yet again)

  • The "Don't Get On That Plane Because I have 'un Last Corny

    「不要上那架飛機,因為我要讓你知道,我們可以過著幸福的生活」的時刻

  • Next

    下一個

  • Stop

    停!

  • Gina wait!

    Gina!等等!

  • Wait

    等等!

  • Gina wait

    Gina,等等!

  • Don't get on that plane

    不要上那架飛機!

  • Please

    拜託...

  • Look, I-I-I know I told you to take that job in Paris

    我..我..我知道是我告訴妳要把握這份在巴黎的工作

  • Where you gonna be making a ton of money

    在那裡妳可以賺很多很多的錢

  • Even though you have to work for that

    他從妳從事這項工作的那一刻起

  • evil boss that makes you feel horrible

    即使你必須為那個邪惡的老闆工作,讓你感到可怕

  • And I know that straight male co-worker

    而且我知道那個看起來很帥的直男同事會在那裡

  • that's incredibly good looking is gonna be there

  • And he's been trying to steal you away from me

    就一直試圖把妳從我身邊搶走

  • from the moment you took this job

  • Just roughly 85(?) minutes ago

    就是大約85分鐘前 (?!)

  • I can't let you go

    我不能讓妳走

  • Because...

    因為...

  • I can't stand the thought of you waking up alone

    我無法忍受你在外獨自醒來

  • with no breakfast in bed

    還沒有床上早餐

  • I can't stand the fact

    不要上那架飛機!

  • there's no possible way that you just gonna randomly

  • show up to my workplace in the middle of the day

  • And more than anything

    還有更重要的

  • I can't bear the idea that our son will only

    我不能忍受我們的兒子

  • get to know his mother through a computer screen

    只能通過電腦螢幕知道他的母親

  • So I'm begging you

    我一直跟你說,是 Gina

  • Don't get on that plane

    不要上那架飛機!

  • Stay with him

    留下吧!

  • Ok

    好吧

  • I'll stay

  • (crowd clapping)

    噢!

  • Gina wait

    Gina,等等!

  • I keep telling you it's Gina

  • Don't get on that plane

    不要上那架飛機!

  • I'm not

  • This isn't even my gate and...

  • I'm going to the restroom

  • Oh!

    噢靠...

  • Well.. don't get on- don't get on your flight

    恩... 那....那不要上你的飛機!

  • (sigh) Look Ryan, we talked about this

    Ryan,我們討論過這件事

  • I have to go

    我必須要去

  • Look, just... just wait

    -我要去廁所了...所以... -不不不,等等

  • Look, I know that I told you to take that job in Paris

    我知道是我告訴妳要把握這份在巴黎的工作

  • And that I was ok with it but.. but I'm not

  • Because I can't stand the thought...

    因為我不能忍受...

  • Of you... Not... In the morning...

    你...沒有...在早上...

  • Dammit, I almost had it

    什麼?

  • I had it on the way here -Yeah umm...

    當我們打招呼時,我就已經愛上妳了(電影台詞)

  • I have to... go to the restroom so.. -No no no, just wait

  • I can do this. I can do this

    我可以做到,我可以

  • *Breath in*

    噢恩, 完全就是《征服情海》 (註:Jerry Maguire,譯:征服情海,1996愛情電影)

  • Oh crap

    你是鳥,我也是鳥 (電影台詞)

  • -Ok -Ok, just... You had me at Hello

    所以你說《戀戀筆記本》? (註:The Notebook,譯:戀戀筆記本,2004愛情電影)

  • Ok?

    好嗎?

  • What?

    什麼?

  • You had me at Hello

    這有點不太對吧?

  • Really? Is that a movie reference?

    有些人值得融化 (電影台詞) (註:來自冰雪奇緣Frozen)

  • You complete me

    我希望我知道如何戒掉你 (電影台詞) (註:來自斷背山Brokeback Mountain)

  • Ok, yeah. That's definitely Jerry Mcguire

  • You're a bird, I'm a bird

  • So you like The Notebook?

    這腳本真的不可行

  • I promise, Jack. I'll never let go

    我保證,傑克,我永遠不會放手 (電影台詞)

  • Alright, hold on, you're Rose, and I'm Jack?

    欸等等...你是蘿絲,我是傑克?

  • That doesn't even make sense

    你只是隨機引用

  • Some people are worth melting for

  • *sigh*

  • I wish I knew how to quit you

  • Really? Brokeback?

    真假?斷背山?

  • Hakuna matata

    Hakuna matata (電影台詞) (註:來自獅子王The Lion King)

  • That really doesn't work in this scenario

  • Ohana means family

  • Ok, these aren't even romance movies anymore.

  • You're just saying random quotes

  • I'm just a girl... standing in front of a boy

    別忘了我只是一個女生,站在一位男生的面前... (註:來自新娘百分百Notting Hill)

  • *sigh*

    嘆息

  • asking him... to love him (lol)

    要求他愛我...

  • Ok, you know what? Seriously, stop

    好吧,你知道嗎? 真的...停...!

  • If I promise to stay, will you stop this?

    如果我答應留下來,你會停下來吧?

  • Ye-yes, yes. I promise

    當...當然!我保證!

  • Ok, I'll stay

    好吧,我留下來

  • Uhm, you know, but I'm curious.

    恩...但我很好奇...

  • How did you actually get back here? Did you buy a ticket?

    你是怎麼回到這裡的? 你買了機票嗎?

  • Well, see I snuck through security

    好吧,我偷偷通過安檢

  • And I kinda ran when they saw me, and then I hid from them

    當他們看見我時我就跑了,現在我還在躲他們

  • And then I tracked you down here.

    然後我跟踪妳到這裡

  • Ryan, that's a federal crime, you could go to jail

    Ryan,這是一個聯邦犯罪,你會進監獄耶!

  • I probably am.

    可能唷!

  • But you will lose your job, we'll lose everything

    但你會失去你的工作,我們會失去一切

  • I know

    我知道

  • Wait, does that mean...

    等等,這意思是...

  • Yup

    對!

  • Well, at least it's not snowing anymore

    好吧,至少不下雪了

  • Ugh, wait. What it that?

    呃,等等...這是什麼?

  • Salt?

    鹽?

  • Guess again

    再猜一次

  • Ugh

    呃...!

  • It's Dandruff Bae <3

    是頭皮屑,寶貝

  • TEEHEE

Hey guys!

嘿!各位!

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現實生活中的浪漫老套! (Romantic Cliches in Real Life!)

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    何佳俞 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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