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Dear Daddy, I just wanted to thank you for looking after me so well, even though I'm not yet born.
親愛的爸爸,我想謝謝你如此照顧我,即使我還在媽媽肚子裡。
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I know you already try harder than Superman.
我知道你已經比超人還要努力地呵護我們。
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You won't even let Mommy eat sushi.
你甚至不讓媽媽吃壽司。
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But I need to ask you a favor.
但我需要請你幫個忙。
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Warning: it's about boys.
警告:是關於男孩的事。
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Because, you see, I will be born a girl, which means, that by the time I'm 14, the boys in my class will have called me a whore, a bitch, a cunt, and many other things.
因為,你看,我是即將出生的女孩,這代表當我 14 歲時,在我班上的男孩們會叫我妓女、婊子...還有其他更不堪入耳的辱罵。
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It's just for fun, of course.
當然,他們覺得這樣辱罵只是為了好玩。
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Something boys do.
這些是男孩們成長中的必經過程。
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So you won't worry.
所以你不用擔心。
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And I understand that.
而我也能夠體諒他們。
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Perhaps you did the same when you were young, trying to impress some of the other boys.
或許在你年輕時也做過相同的事,只為了讓其他男孩對你留下深刻的印象。
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I'm sure you didn't mean anything by it.
我很確定你應該也不是有意的。
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Still, some of the people won't get the joke.
但是,有些人不懂這是玩笑話。
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And funnily enough, it isn't any of the girls. It's some of the boys.
而且有趣的是,不懂得人不是女生,通常都是某些男孩。
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So by the time I turn 16, a couple of the boys will have snuck their hands down my pants while I'm so drunk I can't even stand straight.
所以當我 16 歲時,一些男孩會當我醉得幾乎站不起來的時候,將他們的手滑進我的褲子。
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And although I say no, they just laugh. It's funny, right?
而且雖然我說了不行,他們反而笑得更開心,很好笑對吧?
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If you saw me, Daddy, you would be so ashamed.
爸爸假如你看到我,你會覺得非常羞愧。
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Because I'm wasted.
因為我的青春就被這樣浪費了。
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No wonder I'm raped when I'm 21.
難怪我在 21 歲時就被強暴。
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21 and on my way home in a taxi driven by the son of a guy you went swimming with every Wednesday.
21 歲在我搭計程車回家的路上,開車的就是你每週三一起去游泳的男人的兒子。
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The guy who always told insulting jokes but they were of course only jokes so you laughed.
就是那個總是說著辱罵性笑話的男人,但我當然知道那只是玩笑話,而你也笑得很開心。
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Had you known that his son would end up rapping me
你如果知道後來他兒子會強暴我
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you would've told him to get a grip.
你一定會阻止他的。
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But how could you know?
但你怎麼知道呢?
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He was just a boy telling weird jokes, and in any case, it wasn't your business.
他只是一個說著奇怪笑話的男孩,在任何情況下這都不干你的事。
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You were just being nice.
你只是想表現得和藹。
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But his son raised on these jokes becomes my business.
但這男孩的玩笑話逐漸成為我的困擾。
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Then finally, I meet Mr. Perfect.
最後,我遇到了我的白馬王子。
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And you're so happy for me, Daddy, because he really adores me.
而爸爸你也為我感到開心,爸爸,因為他是真的欣賞我、愛慕我。
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And he's smart with a great job and all through the winter he goes cross country skiing three times a week just like you.
而且他很聰明,又有很棒的工作,整個冬季他每週會去三次越野滑雪,就像你一樣。
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But one day, he stops being Mr. Perfect and I don't know why.
但有天,他不再是那位白馬王子了,而我也不知道為什麼。
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Wait, am I overreacting?
等等,這是我過度反應嗎?
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One thing I do know: I'm not the victim type.
有件事我知道:我不是那種低聲下氣、謙卑恭順的人。
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I'm raised to be a strong and independent woman.
你們教導我要成為勇敢、堅強、獨立的女人。
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But one night, it's just all too much for him.
但有一晚,他終於忍受不了了。
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With work, and the in-laws, and the wedding coming up.
伴隨著工作、岳父岳母、還有即將到來的婚禮壓力。
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So he calls me a whore.
他辱罵我是一個妓女。
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Just like you called a girl in middle school a whore once.
就像你曾在國中時期會這樣稱呼女生一樣。
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And then another day he hits me.
然後另一天他揍了我。
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I mean, I'm way out of line.
我知道,我有時也會忍不了脾氣。
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I can really be a bitch sometimes.
我也許會令人討厭、像個婊子。
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But we're still the world's greatest couple and I'm so confused because I love him and I hate him and I'm not sure if I really did do something wrong.
但我們還是世界上最完美的一對佳偶,但我很困惑,因為我同時愛著他,但也同時恨他,而且我不知道我是不是真的有做錯什麼事。
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And then one day he almost kills me.
接著有一天他差點置我於死地。
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It all goes black.
這一切都變得黑暗了。
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Even though I have a PhD, a fantastic job, I'm loved by my friends and family, I'm well brought up, and nobody saw this coming.
即使我取得了博士學位,擁有一個很棒的工作,而且我的朋友、家人都很愛我,父母從小也很照顧我,但沒人知道我會有這樣子的人生經歷。
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Dear Daddy, this is the favor I want to ask.
親愛的爸爸,這是我想請你幫忙的事。
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One thing always leads to another.
一件小小的作為,可能會導致非常嚴重的後果。
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So please stop it before it gets the chance to begin.
所以在事態尚未嚴重時,停止做這種事吧!
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Don't let my brothers call girls whores.
別讓我的兄弟們辱罵女生妓女。
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Because they're not.
因為這些女生不是。
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And one day some little boy might think it's true.
也許有一天會有男孩信以為真。
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Don't accept insulting jokes from weird guys by the pool, or even friends.
別讓泳池邊的怪人或甚至朋友開這種辱罵性玩笑。
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Because behind every joke, there is always some truth.
因為在每個玩笑話背後,永遠都有一些真實。
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Dear Daddy, I know you will protect me from lions, tigers, guns, cars, and even sushi without even thinking about the danger to your own life.
親愛的爸爸,我知道你會保護我不受到獅子、老虎、槍械、汽車的傷害,甚至是壽司,你毫不顧慮生命的一切來保護我。
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But dear Daddy, I will be born a girl.
但是我親愛的爸爸,我是一個女生。
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Please do everything you can so that that won't stay the greatest danger of all.
所以拜託盡你的全力讓我不再陷入這些危險之中。