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Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business
嗨,我是瑪麗‧弗萊奧,你現在收看的是瑪麗TV,教你開創事業和
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and a life that you love so much. And today’s Q&A Tuesday, and you know what that means.
理想人生頻道。今天是星期二問答時間,你知道我的意思吧。
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That means Qs and As. And today’s question comes from Catherine and she writes:
就是有問題和回答,今天的問題是來自於Catherine,她問到
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“Hi Marie, your show is so helpful and full of action filled advice. Thank you so much for being you.”
"嗨Marie,你的節目對我很有幫助,並給我充滿行動力的建議"。非常感謝你勇於做自己。
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You’re welcome. “I have a problem that’s hurting my personal growth.
不客氣。"我有一個問題,影響了我的個人成長。
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I need to have a thicker skin. I’m very sensitive to other people’s emotions and energy.
我需要變得厚臉皮。我對於他人的情緒和能量很敏感。
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Though I try to push past what’s bothering me, it ends up taking over my whole day.
雖然我嘗試忽略這困擾的事,但反倒花了我一天的時間去應付。
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It’s horrible. What steps can I take to have a tougher skin? Thank you for your help.
這很可怕。我要採取哪些步驟才能變得厚臉皮?謝謝你的幫助。
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Love, Catherine.”
愛你,Catherine。"
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Great question Catherine. So many of us can relate to this, especially me because
好問題,Catherine。很多人都有相同的困擾,特別是我,因為
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I'm a very sensitive person myself. And when negative energy or some toxic things come your way,
我是一個非常心思細膩的人。當有負面能量或事情迎面而來,
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it can really feel like a punch in the gut, and it can take some time to move through your emotional system.
像是挨了重重一拳而喘不過氣來,需要花些時間去消化你的情緒系統。
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But here’s the thing that I want you to know.
但有件事情我想要你知道。
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Your sensitivity is a gift. I mean, for me it’s a tremendous gift. It helps me do what I do more effectively,
你的感性是個禮物。我的意思是,對我而言是一個意義非凡的禮物。它讓我做事更有效率。
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so it’s not necessarily about toughening up, it’s about smartening up,
所以這也不一定是要你強悍起來,而是要提高思維,
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and it’s about realizing that there are practices you can put in place to really
這裡有幾個方式可以讓你試試,能夠
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integrate your heart and your mind to deal more effectively, and here are three that I wanna share.
有效的調整你的心智和心靈,下面有三個方式,我想跟你們分享。
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Number one is start your day smart. So this is important for everybody,
第一,聰明的過每一天,這對每個人都很重要,
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but especially important if you are emotionally sensitive. So recognize that to a large degree,
但如果你是個敏感的人,就要特別注意。所以辨別事情的優先次序,
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each of us gets to control what we focus on first, second, third, et cetera. So you don't wanna even
我們得以掌握第一、二、三,等等的重要的事。所以你不會想要
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invite the possibility of getting thrown off first thing in your day by going straight into email or social media or even having appointments with other people.
在一天的開始,就埋頭於信件和社群網站或甚至與其他人有會議。
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It's like playing Russian roulette with your day, so don't do it. Focus on doing your most important work first.
這就像把自己的生活拿去冒險,所以不要這麼做。要先專注在最重要工作上,
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So meditation, working out, creative writing, whatever that means to you.
所以冥想,運動,創意寫作,任何你覺得有意義的。
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Not only does this help you prioritize more effectively, but it really mitigates the chance that you’re
這不只是幫助你有效的選擇,也免於自己
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gonna get thrown off by other people’s energy.
深陷他人的負能量。
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Number two is consider the source. So if negative energy or criticism comes your way,
第二,是去思考起因。所以,如果面對負能量或是批評,
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rather than letting that punched in the gut feeling just take you down and out, stop and consider
不是讓那批評擊敗你而傷心難過,停止那想法,想想
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the source. Ask yourself, why might this person be upset or be saying what they’re saying?
起因。問問你自己,為什麼這個人會這麼生氣或者為什麼他們會這麼說?
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Now, I know that this is easier said than done, but if you really slow down,
現在,我知道這說來容易做起來難,但如果你真的試著冷靜下來,
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and you really consider the source and think about that person’s point of view,
你會開始深思起因並從他人角度思考,
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it can help you deal more effectively with whatever’s coming your way, and you’ll start to notice,
這個方式可以有效地幫助你面對任何困難,然後你會發現,
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well, this isn’t necessarily about me. It’s actually about them.
好,這不一定是關於我。而是有關他們。
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For example, if there’s just some random ass hat saying cruel, mean things to you on the internet,
例如,如果只是隨便一個人在網路對你說殘忍、有敵意的話,
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you can pretty much bet that that person is miserable, they are lashing out,
你可以非常確定那個人是悲哀的,他們只是發洩,
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and what you need to do is forgive and delete and move on.org. However, if you get
你需要的是原諒他、刪對話除和離開群體。但,如果你收到
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some negative feedback or some constructive criticism from a friend or a boss or a client,
一位朋友、老闆或一位顧客的負面回應或理性的評論,
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really slow down and remember, not all criticism is bad. In fact,
真的要試著回想,不是所有的批評都是錯的。事實上,
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if you can really consider the source you might be able to grow from it. So you’ve gotta ask yourself,
如果你想想起因,你將會有所釋懷。所以你必須要問問自己。
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is there any grain of truth to what they said that could possibly be true and that could help
是否他們的那些話有那麼一絲絲真理,這樣能使你
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you to grow and be better and do better? Again, I know this is easier said than done,
有所成長,變得更好和做得更好?再一次,我知道這是說得容易做得難,
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but if you’re open to it you might consider saying something like this:
但如果你能願意接受這樣的想法,你可能會問:
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“Ok, I hear your perspective, and I’d like to do better. Do you have specific feedback
"好,我知道你的想法,我會做得更好。你有更具體的建議
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I can use to improve?”
讓我變得更好嗎?
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That’s not always the appropriate response, but sometimes it can really help.
這並不總是個最好的回應,但有時真的有幫助。
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But most importantly, you have to put criticism in its rightful place. So to paraphrase a saying,
但最重要的是,你必須知道,受到批評不是件壞事,所以試著用其他方式說,
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when someone criticizes you it defines who they are, not who you are. So all criticism
當有個人批評你,這是定義他們是怎樣的人,而不是定義你是怎麼樣的人。所以全部的批評
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really tells you is what someone else thinks or believes. That’s just their opinion.
真的只是讓你了解,其他人對你的想法和信任。那只是他們的意見。
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It does not reflect on your intrinsic value or the value of what you create.
不是反映出你的本質或你創造出的價值。
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Sometimes you’ll wanna take that feedback in and sometimes you won’t.
有時你會接受他人的回應,但有時你沒辦法。
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Number three is feel it for five and then say buh-bye. So what I mean by that is this,
第三,想五分鐘然後說掰掰。我的意思是,
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we all get upset from time to time. Right? And to deny that you feel upset or disappointed
有時我們都會生氣。對吧? 去否定你的生氣、失望
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or angry like, “Oh, I shouldn’t feel this,” or, “I should be over this thing by now,”
或憤怒,像是"喔,我不應該這樣覺得",或者,"我現在應該不再想這件事"。
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or, “I should be bigger by this by some point in my life.” That is not useful,
又或者,"在生活某些時刻上,我應該要有所成長"。這些話是沒幫助的,
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so don’t do it. 99% of the time we can’t help it. Right? We’re human, we feel things.
所以不要這麼說。但在百分之99的時間,我們沒辦法。對吧?我們是人,我們有感覺。
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Here’s something that I do that really helps. You have to feel the physical sensation
這裡,有件事是對我很有幫助的。你必須要聆聽身體感受,
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without the mental interpretations. What’s that mean? That means feel that kind of punch in the gut
而忽略心靈感受。這是什麼意思呢?就是說去感受那重重一拳、
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or the heavy heart or the actual physical sensation of being upset and feel it fully,
心事重重、或氣憤的感覺,
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because when it comes to emotions you’ve gotta feel it to heal it. But if you don't
因為談到情感,你必須感覺到它,才能治癒它。但是如果你
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attach some kind of mental drama to it, it moves through you pretty darn fast.
沒有陷入一種內心小劇場,你會相當快的忘掉它。
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I mean think about when you stub your toe on your bedpost, right? You don’t attach a whole
我的意思是,想想當你的腳趾撞到床邊柱子,對吧?你不會整個陷入
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mental drama like, “Oh my God, my life is ending.” No, you just feel that you stubbed
一個內心劇場,像是"我的天啊,我要死了"。不會,你只會覺得你的腳趾踢到東西,
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your toe and then in like 5 minutes it’s over. So what you’ve gotta do here is really
然後大約五分鐘後,就結束。所以在這裡你要做的是,
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feel it for five and then say buh-bye. Most importantly, Catherine,
真實的感受它五分鐘,然後說再見。最重要的是,Catherine,
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being able to feel things deeply can be an incredible asset in your life, so don't shut down your heart
在你的生活中,能深刻感受到事物,是件莫大的財富,所以不要壓抑你自己
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or develop some protective armor to protect yourself against a cruel world.
或讓自己有防衛心去防備殘酷的世界。
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And if you need a reminder, remember this tweetable.
如果你需要一個提醒,記得這個推特文。
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“Sensitivity is a sign of strength. It’s not about toughening up, it’s about smartening up."
"敏感是一種優勢。這不是要你強悍起來,而是要提升思維。"
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Catherine, that was my A to your Q, I really hope it helps. And remember, you have to embrace
Catherine,以上就是我對問題的回答,我希望它有幫助。記得,接受
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your sensitivity as a gift because it is one. Now I would love to hear from you.
你獨特的敏感,因為就像是上天給你的禮物,現在我想聽聽你們的意見。
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If you consider yourself a sensitive person, what are some of the practices that you use to
如果你認為你是個敏感的人,你用哪些方式
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both keep your heart open and stay strong?
敞開心胸同時也保有堅強?
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Now, as always, the best discussions happen after the episode over at MarieForleo.com,
現在,一如以往,本集結束後前往MarieForleo.com網站,那裡將有精彩的討論
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so head on over and leave a comment now.
所以現在就過來留下你的意見。
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Did you like this video? If so, subscribe to our channel and
你喜歡這部影片嗎?喜歡的話,可以訂閱我們的頻道,
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I would be so appreciative if you shared it with your friends because it’s awesome.
我會非常感謝,如果你將這部影片分享給你的朋友,因為這影片很好。
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If you want even more great resources to create a business and life that you love,
如果你還想要取得更多更棒的資訊創造出你喜愛的事業和生活的話,
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plus some personal insights from me that I only get to talk about when I’m writing on email,
我會在郵件裡加上我個人額外的觀點,
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come on over to MarieForleo.com and make sure you sign up for email updates.
快來MarieForleo.com,然後確定你有註冊,就能收到最新的消息。
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Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special gift that only you have.
繼續把你的事情做好,持續努力的追求你的夢想,因為這個世界需要你獨一無二的天賦
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Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.
非常謝謝你今天的收看,下次在MarieTV再見。