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  • Any true relationship between friends or significant others should be one between equals.

    任何一段真誠的感情,不論是友情或是跟你的另一半都應該是雙方平等的。

  • You give and take equally.

    你們付出與獲得的一樣多。

  • One person's needs aren't met over another's.

    一個人的需求不應該讓另一方負荷不了。

  • Friends and partners are supposed to give you energy, lift you up when you're down and want the best for you.

    朋友、伴侶應該要給你力量,在你低落時拉你一把,同時也為你好。

  • But sometimes we get into relationships that drain energy from us.

    但我們有時候會陷入消耗我們心力的感情中。

  • These are toxic relationships and they can negatively affect all aspects of our lives.

    那些就是有害的感情,而且會給我們生活各個面向帶來負面的影響。

  • On this week's well cast we're gonna show you how you can tell if you're even in a toxic relationship and then we're gonna help you extricate yourself from that unhealthy situation pronto.

    在本週的單元劇中,我們要告訴你要如何分辨自己是否身處有害的感情中,然後幫助你讓自己盡快脫離那種不健康的環境。

  • Selfie 1 : Diagnose the relationship

    1、感情診斷

  • How do you know if a friend or partner bring you down

    你要怎麼知道你的朋友或另一半是不是在拖累你?

  • Well, in much the same way that you know that you're coming down with a cold, toxic relationships come with symptoms.

    跟你感覺到你正被感冒襲擊差不多,有害的感情也有症狀。

  • When you're around this person, how do you feel?

    當你跟這種人在一起時,你會有什麼感覺?

  • Here are a few other questions you should ask yourself if you're thinking you might be in a toxic situation.

    如果你覺得身處在有害感情中,這邊有幾個你該問問自己的問題。

  • Does my friend put me down all the time?

    我的朋友們是不是總是拖累我?

  • Are they jealous when I spend time with others ?

    他們是不是嫉妒我跟別人在一起?

  • Do they constantly bring up parts of me that they want to change ?

    他們是不是經常提起他們想要改變我的部分?

  • Did they take more than give?

    他們是不是付出比較少?

  • Am I only doing the things that they want to do?

    我是不是只做他們想做的事?

  • Selfie 2: Recognize your role

    2、認清自己的角色

  • In the relationship, as Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."

    在一段感情中,就像愛蓮娜羅斯福說的:「沒有你的准許,任何人都不能讓你感到自卑」。

  • Alright , look , what we got that from Princess Diaries obviously, moving on.

    好吧,我們是從電影「麻雀變公主」學到的是,很明顯地,前進吧!

  • Listen, you have autonomy in every relationship in your life.

    聽著,你在人生中每段感情裡都有自主權。

  • If your friend or partner is stealing your sunshine, you need to figure out what you're doing to allow them to do this.

    如果你的朋友或另一半把你的陽光偷走了,你必須想清楚自己為什麼會准許他們這麼做。

  • Are you being a doormat ?

    你是不是個任人踩踏的腳踏墊?

  • Are you putting this person's emotional needs ahead of your own health?

    你是不是把這個人的情感需求看得比自己的健康還重?

  • Selfie 3: Start to build boundaries for this relationship

    3、開始劃清這段感情的界線

  • Does your friend invite himself over at all hours in the night?

    你的朋友晚上總時隨時不請自來嗎?

  • Are they constantly bossing you around ?

    他們是不是一指對你頤指氣使?

  • Are they always borrowing money from you?

    他們是不是總是跟你借錢?

  • Alright, once you know the boundary that you want to set, stick to it.

    一但你知道自己想劃清的界線,你要好好執行。

  • Draw your line in the sand.

    把話說清楚。

  • Selfie four : Recognize , you can't change other people but you can stop being a doormat.

    4、你要意識到,你不能改變別人,但你可以不要再當腳踏墊。

  • If you have determined a friendship, or a relationship is toxic you know that you have to change the nature of that relationship.

    如果你已經認定一段友誼或一段感情是有害的,你知道你必須改變這段關係的狀態。

  • Start by spending less time with that person and do your best to detach yourself emotionally.

    你要開始花少一點時間跟這個人相處,然後盡全力讓自己情感獨立。

  • Hopefully setting boundaries will help you begin to phase this relationship out.

    希望劃清界線可以幫助你開始慢慢遠離這段感情。

  • Selfie 5 : Get a second opinion.

    5、詢問別人的意見

  • Especially if you're emotionally vulnerable, the best thing you can do is surround yourself with people who love you and who want you to be happy and healthy.

    特別是,如果你是個情感脆弱的人,你能做的最好的事就是讓自己被愛你的人所包圍,也希望你健康快樂的人圍繞。

  • Use them as a lifeline during this time.

    把他們當作這段期間的生命線。

  • Selfie 6 : Above all else , look out for yourself.

    6、除了以上幾點,自己要小心

  • Studies have shown that people with low self-esteem are far more likely to find themselves in toxic relationships.

    研究顯示,對自己較沒自信的人非常容易讓自己身陷有害的關係中。

  • You will never be treated with love and respect unless you absolutely believe that you deserve these things.

    除非你完全相信自己值得被愛、被尊重,你永遠無法被這樣對待。

  • Remember, you teach people how to treat you, so do yourself the favor of loving yourself.

    記住,你要教別人怎麼對待你,所以幫自己一個忙,好好愛自己吧!

  • That's the first step to any relationship.

    那也是任何感情的第一步。

  • To recap, if you have diagnosed yourself as being in a toxic relationship, the first step is recognizing this, then recognizing your role in the relationship.

    總之,如果你發現自己身處一段有害的感情中,第一個步驟是意識到這件事,然後認清自己在這段關係中的角色。

  • Once you do this, you can start to set boundaries for this relationship and change the way you interact with this person.

    一旦你這樣做了,你可以開始為這段感情劃清界線,也改變自己跟這個人的互動方式。

  • To help, surround yourself with people who love you and above all else, look out for yourself.

    更進一步的,讓你的身邊可以圍繞著愛你的人,而最重要的,就是好好關心跟照顧自己。

  • Ah, well, that's all for me today WellCasters.

    今天就先到這邊囉 WellCasters!要幫助自己的話,讓自己被愛你的人包圍,還有最重要的,自己要小心。

  • Would you do me a kindness? Subscribe to our channel.

    可以幫個忙嗎?訂閱我們的頻道。

  • Sign up for our newsletter to receive sneak peaks and other awesome stuff.

    訂閱我們的電子報以獲得搶先看及其他很棒的資訊。

  • See you later.

    再會!

Any true relationship between friends or significant others should be one between equals.

任何一段真誠的感情,不論是友情或是跟你的另一半都應該是雙方平等的。

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有毒的感情?幾招教你斬斷!(Are you in a toxic relationship?

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    Sunny Hsu 發佈於 2018 年 02 月 26 日
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