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  • There have been many revolutions

    上一世紀中發生了

  • over the last century,

    許多革命性的事情,

  • but perhaps none as significant

    但或許沒有"長壽革命"

  • as the longevity revolution.

    要來的意義非凡。

  • We are living on average today

    我們現今的平均壽命

  • 34 years longer than our great-grandparents did.

    比我們的曾祖父母多34年。

  • Think about that.

    想想看。

  • That's an entire second adult lifetime

    這是我們壽命中增加的

  • that's been added to our lifespan.

    第二段成人期。

  • And yet, for the most part,

    然而,重點來了,

  • our culture has not come to terms with what this means.

    我們的文化卻尚未意識到它所代表的涵意。

  • We're still living with the old paradigm

    我們仍然照著舊式生命拱形曲線

  • of age as an arch.

    而生活著。

  • That's the metaphor, the old metaphor.

    這是比喻,舊的比喻。

  • You're born, you peak at midlife

    我們出生,在中年進入高峰

  • and decline into decrepitude.

    然後曲線下降到衰老期。

  • (Laughter)

    ♪笑聲♪

  • Age as pathology.

    老化是跟著病理學曲線而行的。

  • But many people today --

    但現今有許多人﹣

  • philosophers, artists, doctors, scientists --

    哲學家、藝術家、醫生、科學家﹣

  • are taking a new look at what I call the third act,

    對我所謂的”生命的第三幕“,也就是

  • the last three decades of life.

    生命中最後的30年有了新的看法。

  • They realize that this is actually a developmental stage of life

    他們認為它事實上是別具意義的

  • with its own significance --

    一段人生發展階段 --

  • as different from midlife

    從中年時期到後30年的發展,

  • as adolescence is from childhood.

    就有如從兒童時期到青少年時期般的不同。

  • And they are asking -- we should all be asking --

    他們因而提出了疑問﹣我們應該也要想想﹣

  • how do we use this time?

    要如何運用這時光?

  • How do we live it successfully?

    該如何活的有意義呢?

  • What is the appropriate new metaphor

    ”老化“一詞應重新定義

  • for aging?

    為何呢?

  • I've spent the last year researching and writing about this subject.

    去年我一直在研究及撰寫這個議題。

  • And I have come to find

    我找到較適合代替

  • that a more appropriate metaphor for aging

    ”老化“的新比喻﹣

  • is a staircase --

    就是爬樓梯﹣

  • the upward ascension of the human spirit,

    那象徵人類精神的提昇,

  • bringing us into wisdom, wholeness

    也就是帶領我們朝向智慧、完整

  • and authenticity.

    及真實的精神提昇。

  • Age not at all as pathology;

    老化不是病理學的名詞,

  • age as potential.

    老化是具潛質的。

  • And guess what?

    你們知道嗎?

  • This potential is not for the lucky few.

    這樣的潛質不是少數人才有。

  • It turns out,

    我發現,

  • most people over 50

    大部分年過50的人

  • feel better, are less stressed,

    自我感覺較良好、較少有壓力感

  • are less hostile, less anxious.

    、較友善、比較沒有焦慮感。

  • We tend to see commonalities

    面對事情的態度

  • more than differences.

    大多見怪不怪。

  • Some of the studies even say

    有些研究甚至指出

  • we're happier.

    我們是比較快樂的。

  • This is not what I expected, trust me.

    相信我,這樣的結論跟我原先預期的不同。

  • I come from a long line of depressives.

    我曾經焦慮了好長一段時間。

  • As I was approaching my late 40s,

    在我快50歲的時候

  • when I would wake up in the morning

    早上醒來腦中浮現的

  • my first six thoughts would all be negative.

    前六個想法都是負面的。

  • And I got scared.

    我因而感到恐懼。

  • I thought, oh my gosh.

    我想著"天啊,

  • I'm going to become a crotchety old lady.

    我快變成思想怪異的老女人了。

  • But now that I am actually smack-dab in the middle of my own third act,

    現在我正處於生命的第三章,

  • I realize I've never been happier.

    我卻快樂的不得了。

  • I have such a powerful feeling of well-being.

    我感到非常的安穩。

  • And I've discovered

    而我發現,

  • that when you're inside oldness,

    當我們的內在,相對於從外表來看

  • as opposed to looking at it from the outside,

    也相對”陳年"了,

  • fear subsides.

    恐懼感也會跟著消失。

  • You realize, you're still yourself --

    最後會發現,你還是你﹣

  • maybe even more so.

    也可能因而更了解自己。

  • Picasso once said, "It takes a long time to become young."

    畢卡索曾說"經歷歲月後才能變年輕"。

  • (Laughter)

    ♪笑聲♪

  • I don't want to romanticize aging.

    我不是要將衰老浪漫化。

  • Obviously, there's no guarantee

    當然,

  • that it can be a time of fruition and growth.

    要開花結果可不是必然的。

  • Some of it is a matter of luck.

    有些是因為幸運。

  • Some of it, obviously, is genetic.

    有些很明顯的是因為遺傳。

  • One third of it, in fact, is genetic.

    事實上三分之一的原因是遺傳。

  • And there isn't much we can do about that.

    我們可以控制的因素不多。

  • But that means that two-thirds

    但生命尾章三分之二

  • of how well we do in the third act,

    的部分確是我們

  • we can do something about.

    可以好好掌控的。

  • We're going to discuss what we can do

    接下來我們將會討論

  • to make these added years really successful

    要如何善用這些來年

  • and use them to make a difference.

    來造就不凡。

  • Now let me say something about the staircase,

    讓我來說說“爬樓梯”這件事,

  • which may seem like an odd metaphor for seniors

    這個比喻對於上樓梯有困難的長者

  • given the fact that many seniors are challenged by stairs.

    或許是個奇怪的比喻。

  • (Laughter)

    ♪笑♪

  • Myself included.

    我自己也是。

  • As you may know,

    大家都知道

  • the entire world operates on a universal law:

    世界都是以不變的定律來運作:

  • entropy, the second law of thermodynamics.

    熵,熱力學第二定律。

  • Entropy means that everything in the world, everything,

    熵的意思是,世界上所有物質

  • is in a state of decline and decay,

    都以下降、衰退的狀態呈現,

  • the arch.

    那就是生命曲線。

  • There's only one exception to this universal law,

    只有一件事是是例外﹣

  • and that is the human spirit,

    人類的精神,

  • which can continue to evolve upwards --

    可以持續的向上昇華﹣﹣

  • the staircase --

    就如同階梯﹣﹣

  • bringing us into wholeness,

    帶領我們趨向完整、

  • authenticity and wisdom.

    真實及智慧的階梯。

  • And here's an example of what I mean.

    舉個例子來說明我的比喻。

  • This upward ascension

    在面臨極度肢體障礙時,

  • can happen even in the face of extreme physical challenges.

    精神仍就可以向上昇華。

  • About three years ago,

    三年前

  • I read an article in the New York Times.

    我從紐約時代上讀到一篇文章。

  • It was about a man named Neil Selinger --

    那是關於一位名為尼爾 施林格--

  • 57 years old, a retired lawyer --

    57歲的退休律師的故事--

  • who had joined the writers group at Sarah Lawrence

    他在加入莎拉勞倫斯學院的寫作班中

  • where he found his writer's voice.

    發現自己的寫作天分。

  • Two years later,

    二年後

  • he was diagnosed with ALS, commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease.

    他被診斷出肌萎縮性側索硬化症(盧伽雷氏病)。

  • It's a terrible disease. It's fatal.

    那是個很恐怖且致命性的疾病。

  • It wastes the body, but the mind remains intact.

    疾病衰弱他的身體,但沒有侵犯到他的心智。

  • In this article, Mr. Selinger wrote the following

    在那篇文章中,施林格先生將

  • to describe what was happening to him.

    他患病的歴程做了描述。

  • And I quote,

    我在此引述他的一段話:

  • "As my muscles weakened,

    「肌肉雖然漸行衰弱,

  • my writing became stronger.

    但我文風漸行強健。

  • As I slowly lost my speech,

    說話能力雖然漸漸尚矢,

  • I gained my voice.

    但我表達因而變得敏銳。

  • As I diminished, I grew.

    雖然身形憔悴,但我心靈得以依舊成長。

  • As I lost so much,

    因為喪失太多,

  • I finally started to find myself."

    我終究開啟自我心靈的探索。」

  • Neil Selinger, to me,

    對我來說,尼爾 施林格

  • is the embodiment of mounting the staircase

    是在其生命的第三幕登上階梯的

  • in his third act.

    具體代表。

  • Now we're all born with spirit, all of us,

    靈性是與生俱來的,

  • but sometimes it gets tamped down

    但有時我們的心靈

  • beneath the challenges of life,

    會因生活上遭遇的困境

  • violence, abuse, neglect.

    、暴力、傷害、疏忽而受打壓。

  • Perhaps our parents suffered from depression.

    也許是我們抑鬱寡歡的父母親影響了我們。

  • Perhaps they weren't able to love us

    也許是他們論功行賞的主義作祟

  • beyond how we performed in the world.

    而不能愛我們。

  • Perhaps we still suffer

    也許我們仍遭受於

  • from a psychic pain, a wound.

    心靈痛苦、創傷。

  • Perhaps we feel that many of our relationships have not had closure.

    或許我們覺得多數我們與他人的關係並未結束。

  • And so we can feel unfinished.

    我們因而感到還有希望。

  • Perhaps the task of the third act

    或許生命的第三幕的任務是

  • is to finish up the task of finishing ourselves.

    去完成我們未完成的任務。

  • For me, it began as I was approaching my third act,

    對我而言,我是在邁入生命的第三幕、

  • my 60th birthday.

    60歲生日時才開始想這個問題。

  • How was I supposed to live it?

    我要怎麼渡過這第三幕呢?

  • What was I supposed to accomplish in this final act?

    我應該完成什麼任務呢?

  • And I realized that, in order to know where I was going,

    我領悟到,為了知道要走的方向,

  • I had to know where I'd been.

    我必需了解曾經走過的歲月。

  • And so I went back

    所以我回想

  • and I studied my first two acts,

    60歲之前的我

  • trying to see who I was then,

    是個什麼樣的人呢?

  • who I really was --

    我以前到底是什麼樣的人--

  • not who my parents or other people told me I was,

    不是在父母或他人眼中的我、

  • or treated me like I was.

    或是被討好那一面的我。

  • But who was I? Who were my parents --

    而是我自己到底是誰?我的父母親是誰-

  • not as parents, but as people?

    除了父母的身分之外,他們還是什麼樣的人?

  • Who were my grandparents?

    我的祖父母又是什麼樣的人呢?

  • How did they treat my parents?

    他們是如何養育我父母的呢?

  • These kinds of things.

    我想的是這些事情。

  • I discovered a couple of years later

    幾年後我才知道,

  • that this process that I had gone through

    原來我用的方法是

  • is called by psychologists

    心理學家稱之為

  • "doing a life review."

    "回顧人生"法。

  • And they say it can give new significance

    他們說用這個方法

  • and clarity and meaning

    可以使人對人生

  • to a person's life.

    產生新定義、清晰其思慮。

  • You may discover, as I did,

    你們會跟我一樣發現,

  • that a lot of things that you used to think were your fault,

    你以前認為是自己的錯、

  • a lot of things you used to think about yourself,

    是自己造成的結果的很多事情,

  • really had nothing to do with you.

    其實都不是自己的問題。

  • It wasn't your fault; you're just fine.

    那不是你的錯,跟你沒關係。

  • And you're able to go back

    因此,回頭來你能夠去

  • and forgive them

    原諒別人

  • and forgive yourself.

    及自己。

  • You're able to free yourself

    你能夠走出

  • from your past.

    過去的陰霾。

  • You can work to change

    得以改變過去

  • your relationship to your past.

    對自己造成的影響。

  • Now while I was writing about this,

    當我在為這個議題下筆時,

  • I came upon a book called "Man's Search for Meaning"

    我想到了一本由弗蘭克博士寫的

  • by Viktor Frankl.

    "活出意義來"這本書。

  • Viktor Frankl was a German psychiatrist

    弗蘭克博士是一位德國的心理學家,

  • who'd spent five years in a Nazi concentration camp.

    他曾在納粹集中營渡過5年的時間。

  • And he wrote that, while he was in the camp,

    他在集中營時寫道,

  • he could tell, should they ever be released,

    假使有天這些人被放了出去,他可以分辨得出來,

  • which of the people would be okay

    誰心理可以調適正常,

  • and which would not.

    而誰熬不過去。

  • And he wrote this:

    他寫道:

  • "Everything you have in life can be taken from you

    「我們生命中所擁有的都可以被奪去,

  • except one thing,

    唯有一件事是搶不走的,

  • your freedom to choose

    那就是你可以自由決定

  • how you will respond

    以什麼樣的心態去

  • to the situation.

    面對遭遇。

  • This is what determines

    心態是生活品質

  • the quality of the life we've lived --

    好壞的關鍵--

  • not whether we've been rich or poor,

    不論是富有或貧窮、

  • famous or unknown,

    名人或平凡人、

  • healthy or suffering.

    健康或因病而痛苦的。

  • What determines our quality of life

    決定我們生活品質的

  • is how we relate to these realities,

    是我們如何看待事情、

  • what kind of meaning we assign them,

    我們賦予該事件什麼樣的意義、

  • what kind of attitude we cling to about them,

    我們對該事件抱持什麼樣的態度、

  • what state of mind we allow them to trigger."

    我們讓該事件誘發什麼樣的情緒。」

  • Perhaps the central purpose of the third act

    也許生命尾章的中心目的

  • is to go back and to try, if appropriate,

    是回到過去,如果適當的話,

  • to change our relationship

    並嘗試改變自己與過往

  • to the past.

    的關係。

  • It turns out that cognitive research shows

    認知研究發現

  • when we are able to do this,

    當我們這麼做的時候,

  • it manifests neurologically --

    大腦中的神經活動會特別顯著 -

  • neural pathways are created in the brain.

    也就是說神經傳導路徑會在大腦生成。

  • You see, if you have, over time,

    所以如果你一直對過往的

  • reacted negatively to past events and people,

    人事物是抱持著負面的態度,

  • neural pathways are laid down

    由大腦傳遞出的化學及電子訊息鋪設而成的

  • by chemical and electrical signals that are sent through the brain.

    神經傳導路徑

  • And over time, these neural pathways become hardwired,

    長久下來就會變成固定的模式。

  • they become the norm --

    形成標準路徑--

  • even if it's bad for us

    儘管它造成緊張跟焦慮

  • because it causes us stress and anxiety.

    對我們有害

  • If however,

    然而如果

  • we can go back and alter our relationship,

    我們回顧並改變

  • re-vision our relationship

    我們對過往

  • to past people and events,

    人事物的觀感,

  • neural pathways can change.

    神經傳導的路徑就會改變。

  • And if we can maintain

    如果我們能持續的

  • the more positive feelings about the past,

    對過去抱持越正面的觀感,

  • that becomes the new norm.

    那麼神經傳導的路徑就會形成新的的模式。

  • It's like resetting a thermostat.

    就好像重設恆溫器一樣。

  • It's not having experiences

    經驗並不會

  • that make us wise,

    使我們變聰明,

  • it's reflecting on the experiences that we've had

    如何看待經驗

  • that makes us wise --

    才是智慧--

  • and that helps us become whole,

    它讓我們變得健全完整、

  • brings wisdom and authenticity.

    有智慧並回歸自我。

  • It helps us become what we might have been.

    藉此讓我們回歸到初衷。

  • Women start off whole, don't we?

    我們女性的本性善良,不是嗎?

  • I mean, as girls, we start off feisty -- "Yeah, who says?"

    我的意思是, 在我們還是小女孩時,我們都很活潑--"哼,誰說的?"

  • We have agency.

    我們果敢。

  • We are the subjects of our own lives.

    我們是自己生命中的主角。

  • But very often,

    然而往往

  • many, if not most of us, when we hit puberty,

    很多人在青春期時,

  • we start worrying about fitting in and being popular.

    就開始擔心融入群體及是否受歡迎的問題。

  • And we become the subjects and objects of other people's lives.

    於是我們變成了為別人而活。

  • But now, in our third acts,

    但現在,在我們的生命的第三幕裡,

  • it may be possible

    我們也許可以

  • for us to circle back to where we started

    繞回到起點

  • and know it for the first time.

    重新認識。

  • And if we can do that,

    如果我們做得到,

  • it will not just be for ourselves.

    受益的不只是我們。

  • Older women

    高齡婦女的

  • are the largest demographic in the world.

    人口數是世界上最多的。

  • If we can go back and redefine ourselves

    倘若我們能回顧並重新定義自己