字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 (electronic music) - I am eating my feelings. This is a very depressing eating show. Today I have pizza. I'm gonna eat for you guys. (audience laughing) This was not part of the plan. The plan was for me to drink, talk about dicks, and eat. (sobbing) Food always makes you feel better. Oh. (sobbing) Oh god. (applause) - Hey, Nikocado Avocado. Danielmole Guacamole. - Nice to meet ya. - Nice to meet you. Thanks for meeting me at the complimentary Hampton Inn breakfast buffet. - Are you staying here? - No. That's what these robes are for. - You know, I don't think we're supposed to be sitting at the buffet. - Why? - Because you don't sit at the buffet. - A buffets a bar, you can sit at a bar. - I guess. But why do we have to be here so early? - Because that's when the buffet is at its hottest. That's Hamptonality. Get you some forks. Here you go. - All right. - Where you from? - I'm from Columbia. - Are you really from Columbia? - No, no. I live there with my husband. - Hold on, let me try some of these eggs. Explain to me what muck-banging is. - It's actually muck-bong. It comes from Korea. - That sounds racist. - No. - Mukbang. You say it like it's kinda racist. - I'm saying it how they pronounce it. Mukbang. Like if you go to France. You say I'm in Fran-ce. You don't say France. - Fran-ce. So if I'm in China I say, (mock accent) I'm in China. (audience laughing) Is what you're saying? So mukbang. - The word means eating broadcast. The idea was that they'd put their camera down, they film themselves eating and then other people would eat with them. - When do you jerk off? It seems sexual. - Some people do that but that's not my target audience. - You're getting millions of views. - I know but not from masturbators. Do you want syrup? - On pancakes, sure. That's plenty of syrup. You didn't have to syrup the (bleep) tongs. - Oh I'm sorry. - That's for goddamn sure. - I'm sorry. - Don't worry about, don't worry about it. I noticed in the beginning of your videos, you looked a little bit smaller. - It's nice to be here and I'm gonna be doing this a lot more regularly now. Oh yeah. I've gained like 50 pounds. - This isn't healthy. - I know it's not. Let's figure out a way to do this. Oh my god. - [Tosh] What about the amount of food? Why is it so much? - Well I mean it doesn't have to be a lot but I like to eat a lot just 'cause. - No but you're eating an unhealthy amount. You wouldn't eat that much in a normal sitting would you? - Oh no, no, no. - Right, so why are you doing that amount of food? - 'Cause it's a great excuse to get fat. (laughing) - How many videos are you posting a week? - I post like five days a week. - Five mukbang sessions a week? You're gonna die. - I know. (audience laughing) You're getting full already? - Literally getting full already. - You would never be able to do this. - No, I wouldn't. I would be, for like the premature ejaculator mukbangers. - Oh. (audience laughing) - Getting hot. Getting the food sweats. By the way, why are you always crying in your videos? (crying) Are you that emotional? - I am. Well, the food doesn't help either. - Oh 'cause you just feel gross? - Well, you feel like shit but then also like it throws your hormones out of wack and I'm already naturally emotional. So I just, sometimes I cry. - What the (bleep) was wrong with that Alfredo pizza you were eating? - [Nikocado] The one in Columbia? - [Tosh] Yeah, it was big and it was flat. Cheese looked hard. - [Nikocado] Was I crying? - [Tosh] Yeah, yeah you were, of course you were crying. - It taste better than it looked. - Hey, let me grab one of those. - This? Here. That's raw waffle batter. Isn't that bad for you? - Raw waffle batter? I thought this was a waffle smoothie. (audience laughing) Tell me about how this has affected your poops. Are they enormous? - Yes. But people think I eat shit all the time. - Well just mukbang shit. How long after one of your videos before, uh oh. - It's usually immediate. - It's immediate? - Yeah and it's not the food I'm eating, it's whatever is there that gets pushed down. - Is it diarrhea or is it solid? - No, if I eat something that's really really spicy than that hurts. - Yeah, you said your butt hole bleeds a lot. - It doesn't bleed but it hurts. These fire noodles, I'm obsessed with. They really make my a-hole bleed. (burps) Excuse me. Not bleed, sting. Sting like a wasp. - Why fire noodles? - They're popular. - Running low on eggs here! - If it wasn't popular, the Korean fire noodle challenge, I would not be on the toilet crying twice a week. (softly humming) - Them good eggs are on the bottom. Hey, what's up with the bird? You shouldn't let your bird eat that food. That's bad for them. - I know but his names Mr. Noodle. - Just because his name is Mr. Noodle doesn't mean he should eat noodles. - Okay, you caught me. - No one is gonna tell you that feeding your bird hot noodles is a good idea. - Well, you know they can't feel spice. They don't have spice receptors. - I didn't know that. - Yeah, so. - Nevermind. Go ahead and feed them. (audience laughing) Why do you get hot sauce in your eye so much? (panting) - I have no idea why that happens. I'm just doing my video and hot sauce splatters into my eyeball. Every time. Every (bleep) time. - Do you want me to tell you why it's happening? - Why? - 'Cause you (bleep) sit so low. If you had a taller chair, maybe your eyes would be out of harms way. - I don't know, I think I need to get googles from now on. - Pass me the orange juice, please. How long have you been married? - A year and a half. Hey everybody, look who I'm with. - The husband. - [Tosh] You still kiss or do you skip that? - [Nikocado] No, we kiss. - What is this a mukbang gang bang? Easy, spitfire, we need some of these. - Hey, Peggy. These pancakes already got syrup on 'em. - [Woman] That's Hamptonality. - That guys doing the heavy lifting for us. Real piece of shit. (audience laughing) You seem to be riddled with diseases but they're all self diagnosed so I'm calling bullshit. - I don't know why I'm in so much pain and I don't want to go to a doctor 'cause I have a phobia. - You said in your videos that you have chronic coughing syndrome, diabetes, kidney failure. - Okay, I thought I had kidney failure. I actually turned out not to. - Okay. - And I thought that I had diabetes. I actually turned out not to, too. - You eat that durian fruit? - Oh, I love durian. - That smells like assholes. - It does. Actually, my best friend used to say it smells like Indian food wrapped in a diaper. I'll try to eat some durian. - [Tosh] It looks like a pastry on camera. - [Nikocado] They thought it was dough. - It's so, what's the texture like? - It's kinda like scrambled eggs. (groans) - Is there any danger outside of just unhealthy eating? - There is a lot of haters. Actually, that's one of the sole reasons as to why I have a lot of issues. Like, they really get to me. - Of course they do. - You have haters, right? (audience laughing) - What makes you sad, today? - I don't know, I just. Sometimes when I've done a mukbang I feel full and then I just, I think about, all the stuff in my life and I get sad. (somber piano music) - Are you gonna cry? - No. (audience laughing) Maybe. - You wanna hug it out? (audience laughing) (somber music) (crying) - Break it up, boys.