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字幕列表 影片播放

自動翻譯
  • (upbeat electronic music)

    (歡快的電子音樂)

  • - I came across a very short video

    - 我遇到了一個很短的視頻

  • that has more questions than answers.

    的問題多於答案。

  • But if I know teen girls, and trust me,

    但如果我瞭解少女,相信我。

  • I know teen girls real well, (audience laughs)

    我很瞭解十幾歲的女孩,(觀眾笑)。

  • whatever this girl's upset about is dumb.

    無論這個女孩的心煩意亂是愚蠢的。

  • - Well, it's been a great day today.

    - 嗯,今天是個好日子。

  • Can't wait for more. (cries)

    迫不及待地想看更多。(cries)

  • - That's it!

    - 就是這樣!

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • - Well, it's been a great day today.

    - 嗯,今天是個好日子。

  • Can't wait for more. (cries)

    迫不及待地想看更多。(cries)

  • - Chin up, little cowgirl!

    - 抬起頭來,小女牛仔!

  • There's a whole lotta shitty life ahead of ya.

    有一大堆低劣的生活在你面前。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • As a fellow millennial, I know what you're going through.

    作為一個千禧年的同胞,我知道你在經歷什麼。

  • And I can help.

    我可以幫你

  • Everyone, repeat after me.

    大家跟著我說一遍。

  • I am a beautiful, confident girl.

    我是一個美麗、自信的女孩。

  • - [Audience] I am a beautiful, confident girl.

    - [觀眾]我是一個美麗、自信的女孩。

  • - Blossoming into womanhood.

    - 綻放出女人的風采。

  • - [Audience] Blossoming into womanhood.

    - [聽眾]綻放的女人。

  • - This is something to be celebrated.

    - 這是值得慶祝的事情。

  • - [Audience] This is something to be celebrated.

    - [聽眾]這是值得慶祝的事情。

  • - Blessed be the fruit.

    - 祝福果實。

  • - [Audience] Under his eye.

    - [聽眾]在他的眼皮底下

  • (upbeat electronic music)

    (歡快的電子音樂)

  • - Lonnie, who is he, and why do we care about him?

    - 朗尼,他是誰,我們為什麼要關心他?

  • - This is Lonnie, okay?

    - 我是Lonnie,好嗎?

  • And I'm gonna show you my battle cry.

    我要讓你看看我的戰鬥口號。

  • Now people call it the battle cry, the warrior cry,

    現在人們把它叫做戰鬥的號角,戰士的號角。

  • the bird call, the noise, the telephone.

    鳥叫聲,噪音,電話。

  • It's like so many different things

    就像很多不同的東西

  • that they can call it,

    他們可以叫它。

  • but I call it the battle cry.

    但我稱它為戰歌。

  • This is what it is.

    這就是它。

  • (boy screeches)

    (男孩尖叫)

  • - Can you feel your ovaries throbbing, ladies?

    - 女士們,你們能感覺到自己的卵巢在跳動嗎?

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • - Now the battle cry, if you can replicate it,

    - 現在的戰報,如果你能複製的話。

  • leave a video response below.

    在下面留下視頻迴應。

  • It's very simple.

    這很簡單

  • You make a high pitched noise and then you,

    你發出高亢的聲音,然後你。

  • oh God what it is,

    哦,上帝,這是什麼。

  • then you wiggle your tongue.

    然後你扭動你的舌頭。

  • - Lonnie posted that seven years ago,

    - 朗尼七年前就發過這個帖子。

  • and I've been working on replicating the noise

    我一直在研究如何複製這種噪音

  • every day since,

    此後的每一天。

  • and tonight I'm finally ready to make my video response.

    今晚我終於準備好做我的視頻迴應。

  • Oh God.

    哦,上帝啊

  • Wiggle my tongue?

    扭動我的舌頭?

  • Okay. (audience laughs)

    好吧。(觀眾笑)

  • All right, here goes.

    好吧,在這裡開始。

  • Bark.

    樹皮。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • Bark.

    樹皮。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • (upbeat electronic music)

    (歡快的電子音樂)

  • (women weeping)

    (婦女哭泣)

  • - So you can see this activity is sliding off to the east.

    - 所以你可以看到這個活動是向東邊滑去的。

  • We do expect to see some very heavy rain at times,

    我們預計有時會看到一些非常大的雨。

  • and it is gonna,

    它是會。

  • I am so sorry.

    我很抱歉

  • - Oh, we got a sad front movin' in.

    - 哦,我們得到了一個悲傷的前線移動'在。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • - For Schuylkill County, and that is gonna be until 5:30

    - Schuylkill縣,這是要去到5: 30。

  • (sniffs) this evening.

    今天晚上

  • - Chance of precipitation from her eyeballs

    - 從她的眼球中降水的機率。

  • is at 100%.

    是在100%。

  • - I'll tell you what we're gonna do here.

    - 我會告訴你我們要在這裡做什麼。

  • This is Amanda's last 4:00 newscast.

    這是阿曼達最後一個四點鐘的新聞節目。

  • She's moving home to North Carolina.

    她要搬回北卡羅來納州的家了

  • We're all gonna miss you.

    我們都會想念你的

  • - It's healthy to be in touch with your emotions.

    - 接觸自己的情緒是健康的。

  • Don't bottle up your feelings, even at work.

    不要把自己的感情裝在瓶子裡,即使是在工作中。

  • Let 'em out.

    讓他們出來。

  • It's okay to cry, it's okay to laugh.

    哭也可以,笑也可以。

  • Hell, it's okay to laugh at someone crying.

    該死的,看別人哭也可以笑。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • - [Camera Woman] This is a gift that's been hiding

    - 這是個藏起來的禮物。

  • in plain sight for a while.

    在眾目睽睽之下,暫時。

  • - Oh, is this my watch?

    - 哦,這是我的手錶嗎?

  • Really?

    真的嗎?

  • What?

    什麼?

  • Are you serious?

    你是認真的嗎?

  • Are you serious?

    你是認真的嗎?

  • - [Camera Woman] What does that say, babe?

    - [女攝影師]那是什麼意思,寶貝?

  • What is that?

    那是什麼?

  • (man weeps)

    (男人哭)

  • - You know there's pee on that thing, right?

    - 你知道那東西上有尿,對吧?

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • - Oh my God. (weeping)

    - 哦,我的上帝。(哭泣)

  • - Is he sad he didn't get an Apple watch?

    - 他沒買到Apple watch是不是很傷心?

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • All right, that might be too emotional.

    好吧,這可能是太情緒化。

  • Now, this has got to be the most adorable crying video

    現在,這已經得到了最可愛的哭泣視頻

  • of all time.

    的所有時間。

  • - [Interviewer] Andrew,

    - [採訪者]安德魯,

  • are you excited for pre-kindergarten?

    你是否對幼兒園前的工作感到興奮?

  • - Yes!

    - 是的!

  • - Why?

    - 為什麼?

  • - I dunno.

    - 我不知道。

  • - Are you gonna miss your mom?

    - 你會想念你的媽媽嗎?

  • - No.

    - 不知道

  • - No? (laughs)

    - 沒有嗎?(笑)

  • (laughing and crying)

    (笑著哭)

  • - [Audience] Aww.

    - [觀眾]哦。

  • - Oh, don't cry, aww.

    - 哦,別哭了,啊。

  • - He expressed every emotion a human is capable of

    - 他表達了一個人類所能表達的每一種情感。

  • feeling in the span of one second.

    感覺在一秒鐘的時間裡。

  • (boy laughing and crying)

    (男孩笑和哭)

  • - Oh, don't cry.

    - 哦,別哭了。

  • - Nothing's wrong with being a momma's boy.

    - 做個媽媽的孩子沒什麼不好。

  • I hate that I live so far away from my mom.

    我恨自己住得離媽媽那麼遠。

  • (audience laughs)

    (觀眾笑)

  • But you're out of your mind

    但你已經瘋了

  • if you don't think I'm gonna use my TV show

    如果你認為我不會用我的電視節目。

  • to meet that kid.

    去見那個孩子。

  • Totally freakin' out

    完全嚇壞了

  • about the first day of school right now.

    關於現在開學的第一天。

  • Gonna miss my mom so bad.

    會想念我的媽媽這麼糟糕。

  • Do you wanna know what I got you?

    你想知道我給你買了什麼嗎?

  • - Yes.

    - 是的,我知道

  • - It's a lunchbox so you can always see your mom

    - 這是一個飯盒,所以你可以隨時看到你的媽媽。

  • and have lunch with her.

    並與她共進午餐。

  • Say hi.

    打個招呼

  • - Hi, Mom.

    - 嗨,媽媽。

  • - Hi, Andrew.

    - 嗨,安德魯

  • I miss you, Papi.

    我想你,帕皮

  • - [Audience] Aww.

    - [觀眾]哦。

  • (boy whimpers)

    (男孩嗚咽)

  • - Tell your mom, say hi.

    - 告訴你媽媽,打招呼。

  • (boy whimpers)

    (男孩嗚咽)

  • Don't cry.

    別哭了

  • It's just a lunchbox.

    這只是一個飯盒。

  • She's not actually in there.

    她其實不在裡面。

  • (audience laughing)

    (觀眾笑)

  • He might just be a cry baby.

    他可能只是個愛哭的孩子。

(upbeat electronic music)

(歡快的電子音樂)

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三大催淚高手--Tosh.0 (Top 3 Tearjerkers - Tosh.0)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 27 日
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