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  • The world makes you something that you're not,

    世界讓你變得不是自己,

  • but you know inside what you are,

    但你心裡知道自己是誰,

  • and that question burns in your heart:

    於是,一個疑問在你心中熊熊燃燒:

  • How will you become that?

    「你要怎麼變成那樣的人?」

  • I may be somewhat unique in this,

    在這方面,我可能有些獨特,

  • but I am not alone,

    但是我並不孤單,

  • not alone at all.

    我不是一個人。

  • So when I became a fashion model,

    所以,當我成為了一名模特兒時,

  • I felt that I'd finally achieved the dream

    我覺得自己實現了夢想,

  • that I'd always wanted since I was a young child.

    那可是從我兒時就夢寐以求的。

  • My outside self finally matched my inner truth,

    我外在的自我最終追尋了我的真實選擇,

  • my inner self.

    追尋了我內在的自我。

  • For complicated reasons which I'll get to later,

    原因很複雜,之後我將緩緩道來。

  • when I look at this picture,

    當我看著這張照片,

  • at that time I felt like, Geena, you've done it,

    那時候我心想「吉娜,你已經做到了。

  • you've made it,

    你已經成功了。

  • you have arrived.

    你已經實現了夢想。」

  • But this past October,

    但就在去年的 10 月,

  • I realized that I'm only just beginning.

    我意識到我才剛剛開始。

  • All of us are put in boxes by our family,

    我們都被我們的家庭所束縛,

  • by our religion,

    被我們的宗教、

  • by our society,

    被我們的社會、

  • our moment in history,

    被歷史的片刻,

  • even our own bodies.

    甚至是被我們的身體所束縛。

  • Some people have the courage to break free,

    有些人擁有掙脫枷鎖的勇氣,

  • not to accept the limitations imposed by

    不接受別人因為他們的膚色,

  • the color of their skin

    或者他們信仰的不同,而對他們所加的限制。

  • or by the beliefs of those that surround them.

    這些人永遠都是

  • Those people are always the threat

    對現狀的威脅,

  • to the status quo,

    對大眾認知的威脅。

  • to what is considered acceptable.

    對我而言,過去九年中,

  • In my case, for the last nine years,

    我的一些鄰居、

  • some of my neighbors,

    一些朋友、 同事,甚至是我的經紀人

  • some of my friends, colleagues, even my agent,

    他們都不知道我的過去。

  • did not know about my history.

    我想這就是所謂的揭示秘密。

  • I think, in mystery, this is called the reveal.

    下面是我的(秘密)。

  • Here is mine.

  • I was assigned boy at birth

    我出生時是一個男孩。

  • based on the appearance of my genitalia.

    這基於我的生殖器外觀,

  • I remember when I was five years old

    我記得當我五歲的時候,

  • in the Philippines walking around our house,

    在菲律賓,我們常常屋子附近散步,

  • I would always wear this t-shirt on my head.

    我總是把這件T恤裹在頭上。

  • And my mom asked me,

    於是,媽媽問我:

  • "How come you always wear that t-shirt on your head?"

    「你為什麽總是把T恤裹在頭上呢?」

  • I said, "Mom, this is my hair. I'm a girl."

    我說:「媽媽,這是我的頭髮。我是個女孩。」

  • I knew then how to self-identify.

    我那時就知道該如何自我認同。

  • Gender has always been considered a fact,

    性別,長久以來一直被視為一個客觀事實,

  • immutable,

    它是不可改變的。

  • but we now know it's actually more fluid,

    但是現在我們知道,它其實更容易改變

  • complex and mysterious.

    、複雜和神秘。

  • Because of my success, I never had the courage to share my story,

    因為我事業的成功,我之前沒有勇氣分享我的故事。

  • not because I thought what I am is wrong,

    不過,這並不是我覺得自己做錯了什麽。

  • but because of how the world treats those of us

    而是因為世界對待我們這些

  • who wish to break free.

    想要掙脫禁錮者的方式。

  • Every day,

    每一天,

  • I am so grateful because I am a woman.

    我都感激自己是個女人。

  • I have a mom and dad and family

    我有我的媽媽、爸爸

  • who accepted me for who I am.

    和接納我的家人。

  • Many are not so fortunate.

    但很多人並非如此幸運。

  • There's a long tradition in Asian culture

    在亞洲悠久的文化傳統中

  • that celebrates the fluid mystery of gender.

    有紀念性別改變的宗教儀式。

  • There is a Buddhist goddess of compassion.

    比如佛教的觀世音菩薩,

  • There is a Hindu goddess, hijra goddess.

    和印度教的海吉拉女神。

  • So when I was eight years old,

    因此,在我八歲的時候,

  • I was at a fiesta in the Philippines celebrating these mysteries.

    我當時參加了一場菲律賓的宗教節慶。

  • I was in front of the stage,

    我站在舞臺上,

  • and I remember, out comes this beautiful woman

    我記得,有一個美麗的女人

  • right in front of me,

    就站在我的面前,

  • and I remember that moment something hit me:

    我記得那一刻彷彿有東西擊中了我:

  • That is the kind of woman I would like to be.

    「我要成為這樣的女人。」

  • So when I was 15 years old,

    所以當我15歲的時候,

  • still dressing as a boy,

    那時我依舊打扮成男孩的樣子,

  • I met this woman named T.L.

    我遇到了一個名叫 T.L. 的女人。

  • She is a transgender beauty pageant manager.

    她是一個變性人選美活動的經理。

  • That night she asked me,

    那天晚上她問我:

  • "How come you are not joining the beauty pageant?"

    「你怎麼不參加選美比賽?」

  • She convinced me that if I joined

    她說服我,如果我參加的話

  • that she would take care of the registration fee

    她會幫我繳納報名費

  • and the garments,

    和服裝的費用。

  • and that night,

    那晚,

  • I won best in swimsuit

    我贏到了最佳泳衣

  • and best in long gown

    和最佳長禮服,

  • and placed second runner up

    奪得了亞軍。

  • among 40-plus candidates.

    並且在 40 多名選手的比賽中脫穎而出

  • That moment changed my life.

    那一刻改變了我的生活。

  • All of a sudden, I was introduced

    突然間,我進入了

  • to the world of beauty pageants.

    選美比賽的世界。

  • Not a lot of people could say that your first job

    雖然,很多人沒辦法說自己第一份職業

  • is a pageant queen for transgender women,

    是變性人界的選美皇后,

  • but I'll take it.

    但我樂於接受。

  • So from 15 to 17 years old, I joined

    所以從我 15 歲到 17 歲,

  • the most prestigious pageant

    一場最負盛名的選美比賽,

  • to the pageant where it's at the back of the truck, literally,

    我參加了 差不多是一場在卡車後的選美比賽,

  • or sometimes it would be a pavement next to a rice field,

    或者,有時候它會在稻田邊的路上舉行。

  • and when it rains --

    有時天公不作美,

  • it rains a lot in the Philippines --

    菲律賓總是經常下雨,

  • the organizers would have to move it

    主辦單位會將活動轉移到

  • inside someone's house.

    別人的房子裡。

  • I also experienced the goodness of strangers,

    我也經親歷過陌生人的善良,

  • especially when we would travel

    尤其是當我們旅行到

  • in remote provinces in the Philippines.

    菲律賓的一些偏遠省份。

  • But most importantly, I met

    但最重要的是,我遇到了

  • some of my best friends in that community.

    在那個群體中的一些最好的朋友。

  • In 2001,

    2001 年,

  • my mom, who had moved to San Francisco,

    我的媽媽已經搬到舊金山,

  • called me and told me that my green card petition came through,

    她打電話告訴我,我綠卡申請已經通過,

  • that I could now move to the United States.

    現在,我可以搬去美國。

  • I resisted it.

    但是我拒絕了。

  • I told my mom, "Mom, I'm having fun.

    我告訴媽媽:「媽媽,我很開心。

  • I'm here with my friends,

    這裡有我的朋友們,

  • I love traveling, being a beauty pageant queen."

    我愛旅行,喜歡當選美皇后。」

  • But then two weeks later she called me, she said,

    但兩週之後她又打電話給我,她說:

  • "Did you know that if you move to the United States

    「你知道如果你移民到美國,

  • you could change your name and gender marker?"

    你可以更改姓名和性別嗎?」

  • That was all I needed to hear.

    有這句話就夠了。

  • My mom also told me to put two E's

    我媽還建議我

  • in the spelling of my name.

    把名字中間改成兩個『E』。

  • She also came with me when I had my surgery

    當我要做手術時,她還來泰國陪著我,

  • in Thailand at 19 years old.

    那年我19歲。

  • It's interesting, in some of the most rural cities in Thailand,

    有趣的是,有些泰國最農村的城市

  • they perform some of the most prestigious,

    正進行著一些最負盛名的、

  • safe and sophisticated surgery.

    安全並且先進的外科手術。

  • At that time in the United States,

    那時在美國,

  • you needed to have surgery

    你需要先完成變性手術。

  • before you could change your name and gender marker.

    在你可以更改名字和性別之前,

  • So in 2001, I moved to San Francisco,

    因此,2001 年,我搬到舊金山。

  • and I remember looking at my California driver's license

    我還記得看著我的加州駕照

  • with the name Geena

    上面寫著名字「Geena,

  • and gender marker F.

    女性」。

  • That was a powerful moment.

    這是一個充滿能量的時刻。

  • I mean for some people,

    對某些人來說,

  • their I.D. is their license to drive

    他們的身份證意味著有開車資格

  • or even to get a drink,

    或是可以喝酒了。

  • but for me, that was my license to live,

    但對我來說,那是我生活的許可證。

  • to feel dignified.

    它讓我感覺到尊嚴。

  • All of a sudden, my fears were minimized.

    突然間,我不再那麼害怕了。

  • I felt that I could conquer my dream

    我覺得自己征服了夢想,

  • and move to New York and be a model.

    然後,搬到了紐約並成為一名模特兒。

  • Many are not so fortunate.

    許多人並不那麼幸運。

  • I think of this woman named Ayla Nettles.

    我想起這個名叫 Ayla Nettles 的女人。 是個勇敢面對自己內心選擇,

  • She's from New York, she's a young woman

    她來自紐約,是個年輕女人

  • who was courageously living her truth, but hatred ended her life.

    卻滿懷仇恨地結束生命。 ,

  • For most of my community,

    對於我們這個群體的大多數人而言

  • this is the reality in which we live.

    這便是我們所生活的現實。

  • Our suicide rate is nine times higher

    我們的自殺率是一般大眾的9倍。

  • than that of the general population.

    我們有一場紀念變性人日 的全球守夜活動。

  • Every November 20, we have a global vigil for Transgender Day of Remembrance.

    在每年的11月20日

  • I'm here at this stage

    我在這個舞臺上,

  • because it's a long history of people who fought

    因為這是一段漫長的,人民站起來

  • and stood up for injustice.

    對抗不公正的歷史。

  • This is Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera.

    這是 Marsha P. Johnson 和 Sylvia Rivera。

  • Today, this very moment,

    今天,這個重要的時刻,

  • is my real coming out.

    我真正站了出來。

  • I could no longer live my truth

    活在我的『真實選擇』中。

  • for and by myself.

    我可以不再一個人

  • I want to do my best to help others

    我要儘可能地幫助別人

  • live their truth without shame and terror.

    活在沒有羞愧和恐懼的世界裡。

  • I am here, exposed,

    我在這裡,坦蕩蕩地分享我的故事,

  • so that one day there will never be a need

    總有一天, 我們將不再需要

  • for a November 20 vigil.

    紀念每年的11月20日。

  • My deepest truth allowed me to accept who I am.

    我內心最深處的『真實選擇』讓我能接受真正的自己。

  • Will you?

    那麼你呢?

  • Thank you very much.

    謝謝。(掌聲)

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

  • Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. (Applause)

    謝謝,謝謝。(掌聲)

  • Kathryn Schulz: Geena, one quick question for you.

    凱薩琳・舒爾茨:吉娜,問你一個小問題。

  • I'm wondering what you would say,

    我想知道你會說什麼,

  • especially to parents,

    尤其是對父母,

  • but in a more broad way, to friends,

    但是更廣泛地說,對朋友們,

  • to family, to anyone who finds themselves

    對家庭,對任何一個發現他們自己

  • encountering a child or a person

    遇到一個孩子或大人

  • who is struggling with and uncomfortable with a gender that's being assigned them,

    正因為性別的原因 而掙扎和不安。

  • what might you say

    你將會對他的家人說什麼

  • to the family members of that person

    讓他們對這件事的態度

  • to help them become good and caring and kind family members to them?

    變得友善和關心?

  • Geena Rocero: Sure. Well, first, really, I'm so blessed.

    吉娜・羅塞羅: 當然,是的,首先我很幸運。

  • The support system, with my mom especially,and my family, that in itself

    特別是我的媽媽 和我 的家人對我的支持 ,這本身

  • is just so powerful.

    就如此強大。

  • I remember every time I would coach

    我還記得,每次我輔導

  • young trans women, I would mentor them,

    年輕的變性女士,指導她們(該怎麼做)

  • and sometimes when they would call me

    有時候,她們會打電話給我

  • and tell me that their parents can't accept it,

    告訴我她們的父母不能接受這一切,

  • I would pick up that phone call and tell my mom,

    我會接那個電話,告訴我媽媽:

  • "Mom, can you call this woman?"

    「媽,妳能幫我打電話給她母親嗎?」

  • And sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, so

    有時成功,有時失敗— — 我是說,我們生來就有性別,

  • But it's just, gender identity is in the core of our being, right?

    性別認同是我們生命的核心,對嗎?

  • I mean, we're all assigned gender at birth,

    我的意思是 我們生來性別就被決定了

  • so what I'm trying to do is to have this conversation that

    所以我試著要和他們談談

  • sometimes that gender assignment doesn't match,

    有時候性別沒有被合情分配的情況。

  • and there should be a space

    因此,我們要留有些空間

  • that would allow people to self-identify,

    這就是我們應該允許這些人去認同自我,

  • and that's a conversation that we should have with parents, with colleagues.

    這是我們應該告訴父母、同事的談話。

  • The transgender movement,

    變性人運動,

  • it's at the very beginning,

    在它一開始的時候

  • to compare to how the gay movement started.

    就被與同性戀運動的開端相比較。

  • There's still a lot of work that needs to be done.

    我們還有很多工作要做。

  • There should be an understanding.

    請保有一份理解。

  • There should be a space of curiosity and asking questions,

    一份好奇心和疑問,

  • and I hope all of you guys will be my allies.

    我希望你們都是我的盟友

  • KS: Thank you. That was so lovely. GR: Thank you.

    凱薩琳・舒爾茨:謝謝你。真是太棒了。 吉娜・羅塞羅:謝謝你。

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

The world makes you something that you're not,

世界讓你變得不是自己,

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B1 中級 中文 美國腔 TED 性別 吉娜 媽媽 菲律賓 女人

【TED】吉娜・羅塞羅: 為什麽我必須站出來 (Why I must come out | Geena Rocero)

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    田兒 發佈於 2014 年 07 月 17 日
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