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  • ♪♪♪ ♪ ( THEME SONG PLAYING )

    (主題曲演奏)

  • >> Stephen: WELL, HEY THERE, EVERYBODY. WELCOME BACK.

    >> Stephen:好了,嘿嘿,大家都在。歡迎回來。

  • FOLKS, THERE ARE A LOT OF URGENT CONCERNS FACING AMERICANS RIGHT

    夥計們,現在美國人面臨著很多緊迫的問題。

  • NOW.

    現在。

  • WILL THE PANDEMIC EVER END?

    PANDEMIC會結束嗎?

  • WHEN WILL WE GET THE CORONAVIRUS VACCINE?

    我們何時能得到冠狀病毒疫苗?

  • ONCE "THE CROWN" CATCHES UP TO REALITY, WILL MEGHAN MARKLE PLAY

    一旦 "皇冠 "趕上現實,MEGHAN MARKLE會不會玩。

  • HERSELF?

    自己?

  • I MEAN, SHE'S AN ACTRESS, BUT THEN DO ALL THE ROYALS PLAY

    我是說,她是個演員,但所有的皇室成員都在演戲嗎?

  • THEMSELVES?

    他們自己?

  • I AM NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO PRINCE ANDREW'S TAKE ON PRINCE

    我並不期待安德魯王子對王子的態度。

  • ANDREW.

    ANDREW.

  • THE PROBLEM WITH SO MANY BIG PROBLEMS IS THAT THERE ARE

    眾多大問題的問題在於

  • SMALLER PROBLEMS THAT ARE STILL BIG PROBLEMS, BUT WE MIGHT MISS

    較小的問題,仍然是大問題,但我們可能會錯過。

  • THEM BECAUSE OF THE EVEN LARGER PROBLEMS, WHICH IS A BIG

    因為更大的問題,這是一個很大的問題。

  • PROBLEM.

    問題:

  • WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY NEW UNFORTUNATE SEGMENT: "UH-OH!"

    這讓我想到了我新的不幸的部分:"UH -OH!"

  • TONIGHT'S UH-OH: WHILE YOU'RE WORRYING ABOUT THE PLANET-WIDE

    今晚的 "哦":當你在擔心整個地球的時候

  • COVID CRISIS, DON'T FORGET TO WORRY ABOUT A POSSIBLE DRINKING

    COVID危機,別擔心可能的飲酒問題。

  • WATER CRISIS, BECAUSE IT WAS RECENTLY ANNOUNCED THAT

    水資源危機,因為最近公佈了

  • INVESTORS CAN NOW TRADE WATER FUTURES.

    投資者現在可以交易水的未來。

  • UH-OH.

    呃,哦。

  • I DON'T TOTALLY UNDERSTAND THAT SENTENCE, BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE A

    我不完全理解這句話,但它聽起來像一個。

  • HEADLINE IN A NEWSREEL AT THE BEGINNING OF "MAD MAX" BEFORE

    在《瘋狂的麥克斯》開始前的新聞片中的標題。

  • YOU SMASH CUT TO ONE-ARMED CHARLIZE THERON DRIVING A TRUCK

    獨臂的查理茲-塞隆開著卡車,你就這樣被撞斷了。

  • FULL OF WARRIOR-CONCUBINES THROUGH THE DESERT.

    滿是穿越沙漠的勇士之巢。

  • HERE'S WHAT'S HAPPENING: RECENTLY, FUTURES TIED TO THE

    這裡發生了什麼:最近,未來的TIED到的。

  • CALIFORNIA WATER INDEX BEGAN TRADING ON THE CHICAGO

    加利福尼亞州水位指數開始在芝加哥交易。

  • MERCANTILE EXCHANGE.

    商品交易所:

  • MEANING THAT, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, WATER WILL BE A COMMODITY,

    意味著,有史以來第一次,水將成為一種商品。

  • LIKE GOLD OR OIL.

    如金或油。

  • UH-OH!

    呃,哦!

  • THAT'S NOT A GOOD SIGN.

    這不是一個好兆頭。

  • THOSE ARE TWO THINGS THAT WE FAMOUSLY HAVE A FINITE AMOUNT

    這兩樣東西是我們著名的有限的數量。

  • OF.

    的。

  • THAT'S WHY THEY'RE VALUABLE.

    這就是為什麼他們是有價值的。

  • THERE'S A REASON WEDDING RINGS ARE MADE OF GOLD AND NOT BOTTLES

    為什麼結婚戒指是用金子做的而不是用酒瓶做的?

  • OF POLAND SPRING.

    波蘭春天。

  • OH, MY GOD, YOU GUYS!

    哦,我的上帝,你們這些傢伙!

  • HE WENT TO 7-ELEVEN!

    他去了7 -ELEVEN!

  • THIS SOUNDS TROUBLING, BECAUSE THE BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

    這聽起來很麻煩,因為兩者之間的最大區別是

  • WATER AND... COMMODITIES IS THAT WE NEED WATER TO SURVIVE.

    水和... 商品是我們需要水來生存。

  • WHICH BRINGS US TO OUR NEW UH-OH SUBSEGMENT: "YIKES!"

    這讓我們來到了我們的新的UH -OH SUBSEGMENT。"YIKES!"

  • NOW THAT WATER IS A COMMODITY AND CAN BE TRADED ON THE FUTURES

    現在,水是一種商品,可以在未來進行交易。

  • MARKET, IT COULD INVITE SPECULATION FROM FINANCIAL

    市場,可能會引起金融界的猜測。

  • PLAYERS, INCLUDING HEDGE FUNDS.

    玩家,包括對沖基金。

  • YIKES!

    YIKES!

  • "HEDGE FUND SPECULATION" IS NEVER A GOOD THING.

    "對沖基金投機 "絕不是一件好事。

  • JUST ASK ANYONE WHO HAD A SUBPRIME MORTGAGE IN THE EARLY

    問問早期有次級抵押貸款的人吧。

  • 2000'S.

    2000'S.

  • THEIR HOME LOAN IS CURRENTLY UNDER WATER, WHICH THEY'RE GOING

    他們的房貸目前正處於水深火熱之中,他們要去做的是

  • TO WANT TO START HOARDING 'CAUSE IT'S A HOT NEW COMMODITY!

    想開始囤貨,因為這是一個熱門的新商品!

  • THESE WATER FUTURES FOCUS SPECIFICALLY ON CALIFORNIA,

    這些水的未來特別關注加州。

  • WHICH BRINGS US TO OUR UH-OH YIKES SUB-SUBSEGMENT: "GULP!"

    這讓我們來到了我們的UH -OH YIKES子分部。"GULP!"

  • A LOOK HOW MANY BONES I HAVE.

    看看我有多少骨頭。

  • CAN I SEE THAT AGAIN, JIM?

    我能再看一遍嗎,吉姆?

  • LOOK AT THAT!

    看看這個!

  • THAT'S "THE LATE SHOW" PROMISE, UNLIMITED BONES!

    這就是 "晚間秀 "的承諾,無限制的骨頭!

  • THIS IMPACTS THE WHOLE NATION BECAUSE CALIFORNIA HAS A HUGE

    這影響到整個國家,因為加州有一個巨大的。

  • AGRICULTURAL SECTOR, AND RECENTLY HAS MOVED TO POPULAR

    農業部門,最近已轉入大眾化階段。

  • HIGH-VALUE PERMANENT CROPS LIKE ALMONDS AND PISTACHIOS, WHICH

    高價值的永久性作物,如杏仁和鳶尾花,這些作物是

  • REQUIRE A LOT OF WATER FOR UPKEEP.

    需要大量的水來保養。

  • AND I HAWKED PISTACHIOS!

    而且我還叫了皮塔奇斯!

  • AM I PART OF THE PROBLEM?

    我是問題的一部分嗎?

  • I'M SORRY!

    對不起!

  • NOT FOR PROMOTING PISTACHIOS, THEY'RE A DELICIOUS SOURCE OF

    不是為了宣傳PISTACHIOS,它們是美味的來源。

  • PROTEIN, BUT FOR GIVING YOU THE NIGHTMARE FUEL THAT IS MY HEAD

    蛋白質,但因為給你 噩夢的燃料,這是我的頭。

  • AS A NUT.

    堅果。

  • BUT THE BIGGER ISSUE IS THAT CALIFORNIA HAS JUST HAD SEVERAL

    但更大的問題是,加州剛剛經歷了幾次。

  • YEARS IN A ROW OF HISTORIC WILDFIRES AND IS EMERGING FROM

    連續幾年的歷史性火災,目前正在從歷史性火災中恢復過來。

  • AN EIGHT-YEAR DROUGHT.

    一個八年的困境。

  • GULP!

    咕嚕!

  • SO, WALL STREET IS NOW BETTING ON A RESOURCE THAT CALIFORNIA

    所以,華爾街現在押注於加州的資源。

  • DESPERATELY NEEDS TO SURVIVE AND CURRENTLY HAS A SHORTAGE OF.

    亟需生存,目前缺乏:

  • THAT'S LIKE A LIFEGUARD GOING, "THE BAD NEWS IS YOUR HUSBAND IS

    這就像一個護工說:"壞消息是你的丈夫是。

  • DROWNING!

    DROWNING!

  • THE GOOD NEWS IS, IN THE NEXT TWO MINUTES, THE VALUE OF MY

    好消息是,在接下來的兩分鐘,我的價值

  • LIFE PRESERVER FRANCHISE IS GOING TO SKYROCKET!

    LIFE PRESERVER FRANCHISE將迎來天價!

  • WANT TO GET IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR?"

    想進入底層嗎?"

  • NOW, WE DON'T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN WITH

    現在,我們還不知道到底會發生什麼事。

  • TRADING WATER ON WALL STREET, BY WHICH I MEAN WE KNOW EXACTLY

    在華爾街交易水,我的意思是,我們確切地知道了。

  • WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN.

    會發生什麼。

  • ACCORDING TO A CLIMATE JUSTICE EXPERT, "AS CLEAN, USEABLE WATER

    根據一位氣候正義專家的說法,"像清潔、可用的水一樣"。

  • IS BECOMING SCARCER, THE INCENTIVES IN CAPITALISM WORK TO

    越來越稀缺,資本主義的激勵機制正在發揮作用。

  • COMMODIFY IT, AND WORK TO ENSURE THAT THE SCARCITY IS AN

    將其商品化,並努力確保這種稀缺性成為一種新的趨勢。

  • OPPORTUNITY TO MAKE MONEY."

    賺錢的機會。"

  • ADDING, "IT'S THE WAY IN WHICH CAPITALISM MAKES PROFITS FROM

    補充說:"這是資本主義從資本主義中獲取利潤的方式,也是資本主義的一個重要組成部分。

  • HUMAN MISERY."

    HUMAN MISERY."

  • OF COURSE, COMMODITIES TRADERS NEVER GO ALL IN ON HUMAN MISERY.

    當然,商品交易商從來不會對人類的錯誤行為全盤托出。

  • THEY DIVERSIFY INTO GENERATIONAL SUFFERING, DESPAIR, ENNUI AND

    它們分為世代苦難、絕望、恩尼伊和......。

  • OF COURSE, BITCOIN.

    當然,比特幣。

  • IN OTHER WORDS: UH-OH.

    換句話說:呃,哦。

  • WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH SERENA WILLIAMS.

    我們馬上回來,SERENA WILLIAMS將為您報道。

  • ( THEME SONG PLAYING ) IN

    ( 主題曲演奏 ) 在

♪♪♪ ♪ ( THEME SONG PLAYING )

(主題曲演奏)

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影片操作 你可以在這邊進行「影片」的調整,以及「字幕」的顯示

B1 中級 中文 TheLateShow 商品 資本主義 問題 加州 交易

水現在是商品了--斯蒂芬-科爾伯特最不幸的一段話。 (Uh-Oh, Water Is Now A Commodity - Stephen Colbert's Most Unfortunate Segment)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 26 日
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