字幕列表 影片播放
-
-Hey, guys, you know,
-嘿,夥計們,你們知道的
-
it's mid-January, and that means, um --
它的一月中旬, 這意味著,嗯 -
-
Tariq, you okay?
塔裡克,你還好嗎?
-
You look bothered.
你看起來很煩惱。
-
-No, I'm good.
-不,我很好
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
-You sure? You don't seem good.
-你確定?你確定? - 你看起來不怎麼樣
-
-I just got some things on my mind, you know,
-我只是有一些事情在想,你知道的。
-
things to probably go on my irk list.
事情可能會去我的Irk列表。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
-What's your irk list?
-你的騷擾清單是什麼?
-
It's that list that I keep,
我保留的就是這份名單。
-
of things that annoy me, you know, random stuff.
的東西,惹惱我,你知道,隨機的東西。
-
You know what? I'll just show you.
你知道嗎?我就給你看。
-
It's time for "Tariq's Irk List."
現在是 "Tariq的Irk名單 "的時間。
-
[ Cheering ] -♪ Tariq's Irk List ♪
[ 歡呼 ] -♪ 塔裡克的Irk清單♪
-
♪ All the things that irk Tariq ♪
? 所有的事情,刺激塔裡克?
-
-Well, I'm a binge viewer, Jimmy.
-好吧,我是個狂熱的觀眾,吉米。
-
Every time I hear a new season of something good drops,
每次聽到新一季的好東西滴。
-
I binge on it.
我狂吃它。
-
That's how I view things, on a binge.
我就是這樣看待事物的,在狂歡。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
A bender. I watch hard, play hard.
一個彎曲者。我很努力地看,很努力地玩。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
I'm always starved for new content,
我總是對新內容感到飢渴。
-
so it irks me when a good show tricks me into believing
所以我很生氣,當一個好節目欺騙我相信
-
there's a new season available,
有一個新的賽季可用。
-
when it's really only a couple new episodes.
當它真的只有幾個新的情節。
-
"Breaking Bad," "Arrested Development,"
"霹靂嬌娃"、"逮捕發展"
-
"Black Mirror," a lot of these shows, man.
"黑鏡",很多這樣的節目,夥計。
-
Most recently, "Euphoria."
最近的作品是 "Euphoria"。
-
"Oh, look, we found one Lucy episode
"哦,你看,我們找到了一個露西的情節
-
[ Laughter ] lying around the studio!
[笑] 躺在工作室周圍!
-
New season alert!"
新賽季預警!"
-
Nah, I'm not feeling that, man.
不,我沒感覺到,夥計。
-
Y'all are going on the list.
你們都要上榜了。
-
[ Laughter and applause ]
[笑聲和掌聲]
-
-Alright.
-好吧
-
-It reminds me of another thing that really makes my blood boil.
-這讓我想起了另一件事,真的讓我熱血沸騰。
-
You want to know what really gets my goat, Jimmy?
你想知道什麼是真正讓我心動的嗎,吉米?
-
What really grinds my gears? -Mm-hmm.
什麼東西讓我心煩意亂?-嗯哼
-
-You want to know what really
-你想知道什麼是真正的
-
squeezes the jelly out of my doughnut?
把果凍從我的甜甜圈裡擠出來?
-
[ Laughter ] -Alright, come on, now.
[笑] 好吧,來吧,現在。
-
Who's writing this?
誰在寫這個?
-
-Being intentionally annoyed while I'm watching TV, man.
-我看電視的時候,故意讓人煩躁,老兄
-
Like I like to immerse myself in the story,
就像我喜歡沉浸在故事中一樣。
-
to really become a part of the world
真正成為世界的一部分
-
within which the narrative takes place.
在其中發生的敘事。
-
But, say I'm watching something with my wife, right.
但是,比如說我和老婆在看什麼,對吧。
-
Never fails. She'll suspect what's about to happen
從來沒有失敗過。她會懷疑即將發生的事情。
-
and then yell it out to me in the form of a question.
然後以問題的形式向我喊話。
-
[ High-pitched ] "He's not going to go into
[高亢] "他不打算去到
-
that abandoned building alone,
僅僅是那座廢棄的建築。
-
where, if everything happens to him,
在哪裡,如果一切都發生在他身上。
-
it'll be days before somebody found him, babe, is he?"
這將是幾天前有人發現他,寶貝,是他?"
-
And I'm like, "I don't know, Michelle.
我想,"我不知道,米歇爾。
-
If I were to say either yes or no,
如果讓我說是或不是。
-
it would only be speculation.
這只是猜測。
-
But, here's the thing.
但是,事情是這樣的。
-
If we watch and wait patiently
如果我們耐心地觀察和等待
-
[ Laughter ] for just a few more minutes...
[笑聲]再過幾分鐘... ...
-
-Yes! -[ Claps ]
-是的!
-
-We'll know exactly what happens because it will have happened.
-我們會知道到底發生了什麼,因為它已經發生了。
-
[ Laughter and applause ] -That's correct.
[笑聲和掌聲] 這是正確的。
-
That's right. -Yeah.
是啊-是的
-
-It's either that, or she has no clue what's going on,
-要麼是這樣,要麼是她不知道發生了什麼事。
-
so she just keeps checking in with me.
所以她只是不停地檢查與我。
-
"Oh, my God! What's going to happen?
"哦,我的天啊!會發生什麼事?
-
Babe, what just happened?!"
寶貝,剛才發生了什麼?"。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
Or maybe she can't hear.
或者她聽不見。
-
So, like, every five minutes she's all, "Wait, huh?
所以,就像,每隔五分鐘她就會說:"等等,嗯?
-
What'd they say?"
他們怎麼說?"
-
[ Laughter ] Now, my hearing is fine, Jimmy.
[笑] 現在,我的聽力很好,吉米。
-
I have amazing hearing, very clear fiber optics.
我有驚人的聽力,非常清晰的光纖。
-
[ Laughter ] But I'm not here to be
[笑]但我不是來這裡是。
-
your human subtitles for "The Undoing."
你的人類字幕 "Undoing"。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
Sometimes it takes a complete turn for the worse
有時,它需要一個完整的轉折為壞
-
because she only watches the background.
因為她只看背景。
-
I mean, since that whole Starbucks cup
我的意思是,因為整個星巴克的杯子
-
on "Game of Thrones" thing, she's been obsessed.
在 "權力的遊戲 "這件事上,她一直在痴迷。
-
"I can't believe they wouldn't notice --
"我不相信他們不會注意到--
-
I can't believe they thought we wouldn't notice
我不相信他們以為我們不會發現。
-
her shoelaces were double- knotted in that last scene
她的鞋帶在最後一幕打了兩個結。
-
and, now, it's a single knot."
而且,現在,是一個單結。"
-
And I go, "Damn! You irking me."
然後我說,"該死!你惹惱了我。"
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
Take a day off continuity, continuity cops.
放一天假,連續性的警察。
-
[ Laughter and applause ]
[笑聲和掌聲]
-
And she says, "I can't help but notice
她說:"我不能不注意到。
-
all the nooks and crannies.
所有的犄角旮旯。
-
It's called being perceptive."
這就是所謂的洞察力。"
-
And then, I can't focus on the show at all
然後,我就無法集中精力看戲了。
-
because I start thinking, "Why don't you ever hear
因為我開始想,"為什麼你從來沒有聽說過。
-
about crannies without the nooks?"
關於旮旯沒有旮旯?"
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
It's like crannies need nooks for validation.
就像旮旯需要旮旯來驗證一樣。
-
Nooks don't need crannies.
犄角旮旯不需要。
-
They go off and do their own thing sometimes.
他們有時會去做自己的事情。
-
You see breakfast nooks, reading nooks.
你看早餐的小窩,閱讀的小窩。
-
Nook this, nook that.
諾克這個,諾克那個。
-
Stop, nook, and listen.
停下來,旮旯,聽著。
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
You never hear about a breakfast cranny.
你從來沒有聽說過一個早餐旮旯。
-
I mean, nooks and crannies, as a team,
我是說,犄角旮旯,作為一個團隊。
-
they are sort of low-key, though, you know, usually.
他們是那種低調,雖然,你知道,通常,
-
I mean, you hear about them in reference
我的意思是,你聽到他們在參考
-
to like English muffins. That's pretty much it.
喜歡英式鬆餅。這幾乎是它。
-
[ Laughter ] Then I start to think about all the other
然後,我開始思考所有其他的。
-
seemingly inseparable duos with one half who's going rogue.
看似密不可分的二重奏,卻有一半人要叛變。
-
I mean, look at to and fro.
我的意思是,看看來來回回。
-
Fro ain't [bleep] without his boy to.
弗羅沒有他的兒子就不能[嗶]。
-
[ Laughter and applause ]
[笑聲和掌聲]
-
To is dropping solo music,
託是滴個人音樂。
-
he's got his own spinoff show, he's all over the place.
他有自己的衍生節目, 他在所有的地方。
-
"Look, everybody it's to!"
"大家看,這是要!"
-
He's on the red carpet, gossip columns,
他在紅毯上,八卦柱。
-
flying private, dating social media celebrity influencers.
飛私人,約會社交媒體名人影響力。
-
It irks me that fro won't take a stand
我很不爽Fro不肯表態
-
for his independence, Jimmy.
為了他的獨立,吉米
-
Get yourself together, man!
振作起來,夥計!
-
[ Laughter ]
[笑聲]
-
-Wait, what was I saying?
-等等,我剛才說什麼?
-
-You were telling me
-你剛才告訴我
-
about your irk list. -Oh, yeah, that's right.
關於你的討厭名單-哦,是的,這是正確的。
-
-Yeah. -You want to know
-是啊 你想知道嗎?
-
what else irks me?
還有什麼讓我不爽的?
-
This new trend of people using "cheers" as a verb,
人們把 "乾杯 "作為動詞的這股新潮流。
-
you know, as they say like, "Let's cheers to the end
你知道,就像他們說的那樣,"讓我們乾杯到底
-
of the Trump administration!"
的特朗普政府!"
-
And, though I'm definitely going to drink to that,
而且,雖然我肯定要為之乾杯。
-
I'm like, it irks me that we're allowing cheersing
我想,這讓我很生氣,我們允許歡呼聲
-
to take the place of the toast.
以代替敬酒。
-
Jimmy, the toast has evolved from sacred libation ceremonies
吉米,祝酒詞已經從神聖的飲酒儀式演變而來。
-
that date back to the empires of the Greeks,
可以追溯到希臘人的帝國。
-
the Romans, the Egyptians.
羅馬人,埃及人。
-
It's a sacred ritual. It's formal.
這是一個神聖的儀式。這是正式的。
-
You don't just toast.
你不只是烤麵包。
-
There's a proposal involved, and everything.
這涉及到一個提案,和一切。
-
Like if those present accept your proposal and agree,
就像如果在場的人接受你的建議,同意。
-
then they raise their glasses as you have raised yours.
然後,他們舉起他們的眼鏡,就像你舉起你的眼鏡一樣。
-
It's a beautiful thing.
這是一個美麗的東西。
-
Now, people running around, all happy-go-lucky,
現在,人們跑來跑去,都很開心,很幸運。
-
cheersing all willy-nilly with any old beverage
暢飲不已
-
[ Laughter ] and it irks my soul, Jimmy.
[笑聲]它刺激了我的靈魂,吉米。
-
I'm hurt.
我受傷了
-
But, other than that, I'm fine.
但是,除此之外,我很好。
-
[ Laughter and applause ] -A toast
[笑聲和掌聲] 乾杯
-
to a great man. Tariq Trotter, everyone!
到一個偉大的人。塔裡克・托特,大家好!
-
Stick around.
呆在這裡。
-
We've got more "Tonight Show" coming up.
我們有更多的 "今夜秀 "即將到來。
-
Come on back, everybody.
大家快回來吧
-
[ Cheering and applause ] ♪♪
[歡呼和掌聲] ?