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  • -Thank you very much, everybody. Welcome.

    -謝謝大家謝謝大家。

  • Welcome, welcome, welcome to "The Tonight Show."

    歡迎,歡迎,歡迎來到 "今夜秀"。

  • We're here! You made it!

    我們到了!你來了!

  • [ Cheers and applause ] That's what I'm talking about.

    [歡呼聲和掌聲] 這就是我所說的。

  • Thank you, Roots.

    謝謝你,根。

  • Welcome to "The Tonight Show," an impeachment intermission.

    歡迎來到 "今夜秀",彈劾中場休息。

  • Feel free to get up, grab a drink.

    隨意起身,拿起飲料。

  • We'll flick the lights when things start back up again.

    等到事情重新開始的時候,我們會把燈打開的。

  • Well, there's a lot of other news going on,

    嗯,還有很多其他的新聞。

  • as if there wasn't enough drama in Washington.

    好像華盛頓的戲劇性還不夠似的。

  • There are now reports that President Trump's relationship

    現在有報道稱,特朗普總統的關係。

  • with Rudy Giuliani is in trouble.

    與魯迪-朱利安尼有麻煩了。

  • Things have gotten so bad that Trump is telling his staff

    事情已經變得如此糟糕,特朗普告訴他的工作人員

  • not to pay Rudy's legal fees.

    不支付魯迪的律師費。

  • These two were inseparable, and now it's come to this.

    這兩個人本來是分不開的,現在卻變成了這樣。

  • It feels like Dr. Frankenstein breaking up with Igor.

    這感覺就像弗蘭肯斯坦博士和伊戈爾分手一樣。

  • Rudy seemed blindsided by the decision,

    魯迪似乎被這個決定嚇到了。

  • although when hair dye is constantly leaking

    雖然當染髮劑不斷洩漏

  • into your eyes, it's hard to see anything coming.

    進入你的眼睛,很難看到任何東西來。

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • I cannot wait until this somehow ends

    我等不及了,直到這一切結束

  • with Trump hiring Rudy Giuliani to sue Rudy Giuliani.

    與特朗普僱傭魯迪-朱利亞尼起訴魯迪-朱利亞尼。

  • That's...

    那是...

  • Apparently Trump was offended when Rudy asked

    顯然,特朗普被冒犯了,當魯迪問及

  • to be paid $20,000 a day for his legal services.

    領取每天2萬美元的法律服務費。

  • And now Trump is saying that he wants to personally approve

    現在特朗普又說要親自準許。

  • any reimbursements for Rudy's travel expenses.

    報帳魯迪的差旅費。

  • That's great. The President's spending his last days in office

    那太好了總統在辦公室裡度過了他最後的日子。

  • going over receipts like he's Janice from Accounting.

    仔細檢查收據,就像他是會計部的珍妮絲一樣。

  • "Did you stay two nights at the Four Seasons Total Landscaping?

    "你在四季總景觀住了兩晚嗎?

  • We're not paying for that. That's not a hotel."

    我們不會為這個付錢的。那不是酒店。"

  • Even if Trump doesn't pay him back,

    即使特朗普不還他錢。

  • at least Rudy racked up a ton of frequent-liar miles.

    至少魯迪積累了大量的常客里程。

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • [ Applause ]

    [掌聲]

  • ♪♪

    ♪♪

  • Yeah, Trump isn't paying Rudy's legal fees or taking his calls.

    是啊,特朗普沒有支付魯迪的律師費,也沒有接他的電話。

  • I mean, how can you turn on Rudy Giuliani?

    我是說,你怎麼能背叛魯迪-朱利亞尼?

  • He's simply the best. Watch.

    他簡直是最棒的。看著吧

  • -♪ Simply the best

    -只是最好的

  • [ Thumping and feedback whining ]

    [怦然心動和反饋抱怨]

  • -...look at mail-in or absentee...

    -...看看郵寄或缺席... ...。

  • [ Fart sound ]

    [放屁聲]

  • Whoa. Wow.

    哇。哇哦

  • -♪ Better than anyone

    -比任何人都好

  • [ Sighing ]

    [嘆氣]

  • -♪ Anyone I ever met

    -我見過的任何人

  • Oh, you're the best

    哦,你是最好的

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    [歡呼聲和掌聲]

  • -Come on. -Ah.

    -來吧-啊

  • -Ah.

    -啊

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • -Well, I heard that between fighting with Rudy

    -我聽說在和Rudy打架之間

  • and the impeachment, Trump is reportedly isolated

    和彈劾,據說特朗普被孤立了。

  • and in self-pity mode.

    並處於自憐模式。

  • Yeah, these are sad times for Trump.

    是啊,現在是特朗普的悲哀時代。

  • He wanted to listen to "Everybody Hurts,"

    他想聽 "每個人都會受傷"。

  • but he just got banned from Spotify.

    但他剛從Spotify被禁止。

  • Yep, right now Trump's all alone,

    是的,現在特朗普是孤軍奮戰。

  • plowing through a pint of Ben & Jerry's

    猛喝一品脫本傑利酒

  • Impeach-Mint Chocolate Chip.

    劾-薄荷巧克力片。

  • -Ohh. -Trump can't even go

    -特朗普甚至不能去。

  • to his own bathroom without getting depressed.

    到自己的衛生間,而不感到沮喪。

  • His hair dye reminds him of Rudy Giuliani,

    他的染髮劑讓他想起了魯迪-朱利安尼。

  • his Q-Tips remind him of Mike Pence,

    他的Q-Tips讓他想起了邁克-彭斯。

  • and his toilet reminds him of Twitter.

    和他的廁所讓他想起了推特。

  • "I've written some of my best work there."

    "我在那裡寫了一些我最好的作品。"

  • People close to the President say that he's spending

    總統身邊的人說,他在花。

  • his final days in the office

    臨危受命

  • trying to rehabilitate his brand,

    試圖恢復他的品牌。

  • which is now being described as "radioactive."

    現在被描述為 "放射性"。

  • Of course, Trump's radioactive. That's what happens

    當然,特朗普的放射性。這就是發生的事情

  • when you spend 20 hours a day in a tanning booth.

    當你每天花20個小時在日光浴房裡。

  • Zzt! Zzt!

    Zzt! Zzt!Zzt! Zzt!

  • You can tell Trump's brand has taken a hit 'cause even

    你可以看出特朗普的品牌受到了打擊,因為即使是... ...

  • the Girl Scouts of Greater New York

    大紐約女童子軍

  • are trying to get out of their lease

    正在試圖擺脫他們的租約

  • in his building in Lower Manhattan.

    在他位於曼哈頓下城的大樓裡。

  • It's not often that we get to see the Girl Scouts

    我們很少能看到女童子軍的身影

  • share a common enemy with Iran.

    與伊朗有著共同的敵人。

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • But Trump has a plan.

    但特朗普有一個計劃。

  • He's gonna replace the Girl Scouts

    他要取代女童子軍

  • with the Proud Boy Scouts, so that's...

    與驕傲的童子軍,所以這是... ...

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • -Deep cut. -Yeah, it's a deep cut.

    -深度切割-是的,這是一個深切。

  • You get it, though. Yeah.

    你明白的,雖然。是的,我明白了

  • -I got it. -Yeah.

    -我知道了-我知道了

  • Everyone kind of got it and did the same thing.

    大家都有點明白了,也都做了同樣的事情。

  • They go, "Oh-- Ahh."

    他們走了,"哦... ... 啊。"

  • -Yeah. Yeah. -Yep, yep, yep.

    -是啊,是啊是的,是的,是的,是的。

  • I can get a couple yep, yep, yeps. I don't care.

    我可以得到幾個耶,耶,耶。我不在乎。

  • -Yep, yep, yep. -Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

    -是的,是的,是的。-是的,是的,是的。嗯哼.

  • -Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. -Yep, yep, yep.

    -是的,是的,是的,是的,是的。-是的,是的,是的,是的。

  • -Well, speaking of moving, Trump's staff is starting

    -說到搬家,特朗普的工作人員開始了。

  • to leave the White House for good, and people have

    離開白宮,而人們已

  • been seen walking out with, like, different items.

    被人看到走出去,像,不同的項目。

  • It's like -- It looks like Trump's advisor Peter Navarro

    這就像... ... 它看起來像特朗普的顧問彼得-納瓦羅。

  • decided to take home this photo.

    決定把這張照片帶回家。

  • Do you see that? Yeah.

    你看到了嗎?看到了

  • Yeah, that'll look good in any room.

    是啊,這在任何房間都會很好看。

  • And earlier today a guy was seen walking out of the West Wing

    今天早些時候,有人看到一個人從西翼走出來。

  • with what appeared to be a bust of Abraham Lincoln.

    與什麼似乎是亞伯拉罕-林肯的半身像。

  • Watch this. This is real.

    看這個。這是真實的。

  • "Yeah. How you doing? Have a good day.

    "是啊,你怎麼樣?有一個好的一天。

  • Hey, how's it going? Take care, bud."

    嘿,怎麼樣了?保重,夥計。"

  • "Oh, nothing. Take care, dude."

    "哦,沒什麼。保重,老兄。"

  • Trump's giving stuff away like the sun's about to set

    特朗普送東西就像太陽要落山一樣。

  • on his weekend garage sale.

    在他的週末車庫銷售。

  • He's like, "You know what? It's getting late. Just take it.

    他說,"你知道嗎?這是越來越晚了。只是把它。

  • I was only going to charge a dime for it anyway."

    反正我只打算收一毛錢。"

  • Later, another guy was seen carrying out Mike Pence.

    後來,又看到一個人抬出了邁克-彭斯。

  • He was like, "Hey, put me down! I'm not a statue!

    他就像,"嘿,把我放下!我不是雕像!

  • Mother! Mother!"

    母親!母親!母親!媽媽!"

  • [ Applause ]

    [掌聲]

  • Well, this is pretty exciting.

    嗯,這是很令人興奮的。

  • It was just announced that Lady Gaga and Jennifer Lopez

    剛剛宣佈Lady Gaga和Jennifer Lopez。

  • will sing at President-elect Biden's inauguration.

    將在當選總統拜登的就職典禮上演唱。

  • Trump was like, "Well, well, well.

    特朗普當時就說:"好,好,好。

  • Guess you couldn't get a 3 Doors Down cover band."

    估計你找不到3 Doors Down的翻唱樂隊了。"

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • And this is nice -- Lady Gaga said

    這是很好的 - Lady Gaga說

  • that she's going to change the words in "Shallow"

    她要把 "淺 "字改成 "淺 "字。

  • to be about Biden's water-aerobics class.

    是關於拜登的水上健美操課。

  • [ Delayed laughter ] -Yep.

    [延遲的笑聲] 是的。

  • -Yep. That was a yep, yep, yeah. -Yep, yep, yep, yep.

    -是的。是的,是的,是的,是的。-是的,是的,是的,是的,是的。

  • -It's like we're on a Zoom, but we're actually in the same room.

    -就像我們在變焦機上,但我們實際上是在同一個房間裡。

  • It's amazing.

    太神奇了

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • Did you guys hear about this story? This is insane.

    你們聽說過這個故事嗎?這是瘋了。

  • I read that an investor has over $200 million worth

    我讀到一個投資者有超過2億美元的價值。

  • of bitcoin in a digital wallet

    數字錢包中的比特幣

  • but can't remember his password to unlock it.

    但不記得他的密碼,無法解鎖。

  • Now, it gets worse.

    現在,它變得更糟。

  • He's already tried eight times, and he only has two more tries

    他已經試過八次了,還有兩次就可以了

  • to get it right, or the device will self-delete.

    以使其正確,否則設備會自動刪除。

  • Dude, I start sweating when I'm 0 for 2 with my Zappos password.

    夥計,我開始出汗時,我的Zappos密碼0為2。

  • Imagine trying to remember a password you used 10 years ago.

    想象一下,你想記住一個10年前使用的密碼。

  • It's like, uh, "daughtryfan123"?

    就像,呃,"daughtryfan123"?

  • [ Laughter ]

    [笑聲]

  • And, finally, authorities in the Florida Keys

    最後,當局在佛羅里達群島

  • arrested an intoxicated man who stole a tiki hut boat bar.

    逮捕了一名偷竊提基小屋船吧的醉酒男子。

  • Even crazier, that was also taken from the White House.

    更瘋狂的是,那也是在白宮拍的。

  • [ Laughter ] It was a rough day for that guy.

    [笑]這是一個粗糙的一天,那傢伙。

  • He also blew out a flip-flop, stepped on a pop top,

    他還爆了一個人字拖,踩了一個爆款。

  • and lost his shaker of salt.

    並失去了他的鹽罐。

-Thank you very much, everybody. Welcome.

-謝謝大家謝謝大家。

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B2 中高級 中文 TheTonightShow 特朗普 魯迪 笑聲 童子軍 掌聲

特朗普拒絕支付魯迪-朱利安尼的費用|《今夜秀》|《今夜秀》。 (Trump Refuses to Pay Rudy Giuliani | The Tonight Show)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 15 日
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