Placeholder Image

字幕列表 影片播放

  • Transcriber: Leslie Gauthier Reviewer: Krystian Aparta

    譯者: Yunchi Hsu 審譯者: Amanda Zhu

  • What can we learn from children about being better humans?

    我們能從孩子身上學習到甚麼 以成為一個更好的人呢?

  • They're fiercely loyal to their friends,

    他們對朋友極度忠誠、

  • fast to defend, quick to apologize

    防禦心強、勇於道歉,

  • and swift to forgive.

    也不吝於寬恕別人。

  • But as a past kindergarten teacher --

    但是作為一個前幼稚園老師──

  • always a kindergarten teacher at heart --

    到現在一直也以幼稚園老師自居──

  • I want to share with you

    我想要和你分享

  • a surprising lesson I learned from them about being asked for help.

    我從他們身上學到關於求助的 意外又寶貴的一課。

  • I love human behaviors --

    我對人類的行為很感到興趣

  • how we act differently in different situations and environments --

    ──我們如何因不同的情境與環境 做出不同的行動──

  • and these cute five-year-olds with their adorable cheeks

    而這些有雙可愛臉頰

  • and the perfect height to give warm, morning hugs to

    以及讓人想要在早晨 給一個溫暖擁抱的完美身高

  • and almost a competitive love for high fives,

    又酷愛擊掌的五歲小孩

  • were so interesting.

    是如此的有趣。

  • My first class was called a Mars class.

    我帶的第一個班叫做火星班。

  • I had 10 students,

    我有十位學生,

  • and each were so full of character.

    而每個人都充滿個性。

  • But there was this one kid I'll never forget.

    但是有一位小孩令我印象非常深刻。

  • Let's call him Sam.

    我們就稱作他「山姆」吧。

  • Sam behaved like he forgot he was only five.

    山姆的舉止表現 不像是一位只有五歲的小孩。

  • He was so independent.

    他非常獨立自主。

  • Not only did he know how to tie his own shoelaces,

    他不僅知道如何自己綁鞋帶,

  • but he knew how to tie other kids' shoelaces too.

    他還知道如何幫其他小孩綁鞋帶。

  • He also never took home a dirty thermos,

    他總是帶著乾淨的熱水瓶回家,

  • because he would clean it after his lunch.

    因為他午餐後都會去清洗它。

  • And if something happened and he needed a change of clothes,

    而當他因某些緣故需要換衣服時,

  • he would do so very quietly and discreetly by himself.

    他總是非常安靜而謹慎地一個人做。

  • He didn't ask for help much himself,

    他自己不太會來求助,

  • but he was the one that his classmates went to for help --

    但他都是那位同學來求助的人,

  • help on things like,

    像是幫忙吃完他們的泡菜, 因為太辣了。

  • can he help them finish their kimchi? Because it's too spicy.

    他不太喜歡對老師流露任何感情

  • He didn't like showing any type of affection to teachers

    並表現出一副「酷酷的」模樣。

  • and came across as "the cool kid."

    如果你想要給他一個早安的擁抱,

  • If you gave him a good-morning hug,

    他會對你翻白眼

  • he would roll his eyes

    並做鬼臉來表現不滿,

  • and make a funny face as to show discontent,

    但如果他沒得到擁抱, 他仍會站在那裡並等著你來抱他。

  • but also stand there and wait if he didn't get his morning hug.

    他是如此的聰明且可靠,

  • He was so smart and reliable

    甚至連我有時都會忘記 他只有五歲而已。

  • that even I would forget that he was only five.

    做為一位新手老師,

  • As a novice teacher,

    我花很多時間去觀察

  • I spent a lot of time observing

    較有經驗的老師如何 與他們的學生互動。

  • how more experienced teachers interacted with their students.

    而我注意到一件非常特別的現象。

  • And I noticed something very peculiar.

    經常,當小朋友跌到時,

  • Oftentimes when kids fall,

    他們並不會立刻就哭出來。

  • they don't start crying immediately.

    他們會起來,感到困惑,

  • They would stand up, puzzled,

    彷彿他們還在考慮──

  • as if trying to make up their mind --

    「剛剛發生了甚麼事?」

  • you know, "What just happened?"

    「這有嚴重到我需要哭的地步嗎?

  • "Is this a big enough deal for me to cry?

    這樣會痛嗎?發生了甚麼事?」

  • Does this hurt? What's going on?"

    小孩通常會沒事,直到他們的 視線落在一個大人身上:

  • Usually kids will be OK until they lock eyes with an adult:

    那位他們所信任 而且能為他們做點甚麼的人。

  • one that they trust and know can do something for them.

    跟那位大人視線鎖定後, 接著,他們便開始嚎啕大哭。

  • Eyes lock, and then, they burst out in tears.

    當我注意到這件事時, 我多希望它能發生在我身上,

  • When I noticed this, I so wanted it to happen to me,

    因為對我來說,那意味著 你已贏得了一個小朋友的信任,

  • because to me, that meant that you had earned a kid's trust

    並且證明了你有能力 為他們提供任何幫助。

  • and had proven that you're capable to help them with anything.

    你就是他們的英雄。

  • You were a hero to them.

    過了幾個禮拜,我目睹小孩們噙著淚水

  • Weeks went by of me just watching other teachers

    跑向其他老師的懷抱,

  • have kids run to them in tears,

    而我只能在一旁羨慕地看著。

  • and I'd watch in jealousy.

    噢,我真是羨慕他們。

  • Oh, was I jealous.

    當然,我並不是希望小孩子跌倒受傷,

  • I mean, of course I didn't want the kids to fall,

    但我十分渴望能夠證明 自己的那一刻會到來,

  • but I really wanted that moment of validation

    證明我已經得到小孩足夠的信任, 他們覺得我也能幫助他們。

  • that yes, I had earned a kid's trust enough to be the one to help them.

    然後,那一刻終於來臨了。

  • Then, it finally happened.

    那是一個美好的一天。

  • It was a beautiful day.

    事情發生在下課時間的室內遊樂區。

  • It was during recess at the indoor playground.

    孩子們正在玩耍,

  • The kids were playing

    而我正在護貝東西

  • and I was getting some things laminated --

    ──因為老師總是一直在護貝東西──

  • because teachers are forever laminating stuff --

    他們在教師室隔壁的房間裡。

  • in the teacher's room next door.

    接著我聽到一個小孩喊著: 「老師!老師!山姆跌倒了!」

  • Then I heard a kid yell, "Teacher, teacher, Sam fell down."

    所以我就出去看,

  • So I went out to peak,

    尋找山姆的所在。

  • looked around for Sam,

    我看到他了,他看起來非常困惑,

  • and there he was, looking very puzzled,

    彷彿像是在思考 二位數的加法怎麼做一樣。

  • as if he was trying to add double digits.

    然後他看著我,

  • Then he looked at me,

    我們的視線對上,

  • our eyes locked,

    而事情就發生了。

  • and then it happened.

    他的下唇開始顫抖,

  • His lower lip started to tremble

    而他小巧的雙眼開始盈滿淚水。

  • and his tiny eyes started to fill with tears.

    接著,他開始大哭,朝著我奔來,

  • Then he burst out in tears running towards me,

    我永遠都不會忘記

  • and it was glorious.

    這美妙的一刻。

  • I'll never forget that moment.

    他讓我給他一個大大的擁抱 使他冷靜下來,

  • He let me give him a big hug to help him calm down,

    事實證明,沒錯, 他的確是自己失足絆倒的,

  • and it turns out that yes, he did trip over his own two feet

    所以唯一的罪魁禍首 沒有別人,只有地板。

  • so there was no one other than the floor to reprimand.

    我們檢查並確定他有沒有受傷,

  • We checked to make sure that he wasn't hurt

    而他也撐過去了,連個瘀青都沒有。

  • and he overcame that with not even a bruise.

    奇怪的是,在那一刻,

  • It was in that moment, oddly --

    我覺得我並不是在幫忙山姆,

  • it didn't feel like I was there to help Sam,

    而是他送給我這一份禮物,

  • but rather he was giving me this gift,

    一個幫忙他的機會。

  • this opportunity to help him.

    而我難以用言語來形容 這種十分奇異的感覺。

  • And it's something very weird that I struggle putting down in words.

    因為他的脆弱,

  • With his vulnerability

    來向我求助,好像我可以做點甚麼,

  • in coming to me for help as if I could do something about it,

    你會認為這件事會給我權力,

  • you would think that gives me the power,

    但在那一刻,

  • but in that moment,

    不是的,完全相反,

  • no, it was quite the opposite,

    反而是更多權力轉移到他的身上。

  • and the power shifted even more so to him.

    被請求幫忙是一份榮幸:

  • Being asked for help is a privilege:

    這份禮物讓你能夠幫某人做某事,

  • a gift for you to do something for someone,

    特別是當他們感到脆弱的時候。

  • especially when it's coming from their place of vulnerability.

    靠著我在幼稚園學到的一切,

  • With everything I learned from kindergarten,

    或者說在幼稚園「教學」的經驗,

  • or in "teaching" kindergarten,

    我克服了人生中的其他挑戰。

  • I went to conquer other things in life.

    時間跳至九年後,

  • Fast-forward nine years,

    我加入了一個 專案管理專業人員的協會,

  • and I landed in an association for project management professionals

    並接下與志工廣泛合作的職責。

  • in a role that works extensively with volunteers.

    和志工一起工作是一個很棒的經驗,

  • Working with volunteers is a wonderful experience,

    但有些事情, 我真希望當初能早點知道,

  • but there are some things I wish had a been warned about,

    像是如何設好界線。

  • like how to set boundaries.

    「因為他們是志工」的想法

  • It's very easy to fall into the rabbit hole

    很容易讓人使自己陷入窘境。

  • of "because they're volunteers."

    半夜還打電話來?

  • Late night calls?

    當然,因為他們是志工, 白天還有工作要做。

  • Yes, because they're volunteers and have day jobs.

    周末的時候還必須要出差?

  • Business trips that are almost exclusively only on weekends?

    沒辦法,因為他們是志工, 平日還有工作要做。

  • Yes, because they're volunteers and have day jobs.

    我並不是想炫耀自己,

  • Not to pat myself on the back,

    但是我在這份工作表現得挺好的。

  • but I got quite good at my job.

    我因我與他人所建立的關係感到滿足,

  • I was thriving off of the relationships I was building.

    而據我所知,判斷我是否獲得 他人信任的最好方法

  • And the best way I knew how to judge whether I had earned someone's trust

    即是,他們是否會前來向我求助。

  • was if they would come and ask me for help.

    我很愛這種感覺。

  • I loved it.

    每當我們舉辦教會的年終靜修會,

  • Every time we did year-end retreats

    而我們談論來年 想要成為甚麼樣的人時,

  • and we talked about what we wanted to be in the next year,

    我的關鍵字總是「助人」, 或是「樂於助人」。

  • my keywords were always "help" or "helpful."

    問題是,我不只是樂於助人而已,

  • The problem was that I wasn't being just helpful.

    隨著時間過去, 我給自己越來越多的壓力,

  • Over time, I put more and more pressure on myself

    總是讓自己過得忙碌,

  • to always be busy

    並經常要求自己有好表現。

  • and to always do a good job.

    很快地,我的自我價值 變得與工作表現有關,

  • Soon my self-worth became associated with my performance at work,

    基本上這簡直是災難的禍源。

  • which is basically a recipe for disaster.

    但不用擔心,我有絕佳的應付機制,

  • But don't worry, because I had the best coping mechanism,

    分別是:否認、

  • which was denial,

    用更多的工作讓自己分心、

  • distraction with even more work

    以及飲酒,

  • and drinking --

    而且喝很多。

  • and lots of it.

    我忙著當一位獨立且樂於助人的人,

  • I was so busy being helpful and independent

    當一位很棒的「小山姆」,

  • and being a great Sam

    卻忘記了如何在 我需要幫助時出聲求助。

  • that I forgot how to ask for help when I needed it.

    我只需要開口,

  • All I had to do was ask,

    而且,如果我真的相信 求助是給別人的一份禮物,

  • and if I truly believed that asking for help was a gift,

    那我應該更常去做,對吧?

  • then I should have been doing it more, right?

    不過,我們並不總是言行一致,

  • Well, we don't always practice what we preach,

    但大約兩年前,

  • but about two years ago,

    發生一件事,給了我沉痛的提醒。

  • I was slapped with a big, fat reminder.

    要說我那時是疲勞過度, 都還太輕描淡寫了,

  • To say that I was burned-out at the time was an understatement,

    但是多虧我的應對機制──飲酒,

  • but thanks to my coping mechanism, drinking,

    表面上,我看起來過得很開心。

  • it looked like I was just having a great time.

    但有一天,

  • But one day,

    就像遊樂場裡的山姆,

  • just like Sam in the playground,

    我失足跌倒了。

  • I tripped over my own two feet.

    我失去知覺,

  • I blacked out

    一醒來便發現, 腳上被碎玻璃割出大大的傷口,

  • and woke up with a big cut on my foot from broken pieces of glass,

    眼睛哭得腫腫的,

  • eyes swollen from crying

    而且聲音非常沙啞, 看來我很可能哭了很久。

  • and a voice so hoarse that I'd most likely been wailing.

    我對實際到底發生甚麼事 沒有太多的記憶,

  • I don't have much recollection of what actually happened,

    但我記得我感到挫折、沮喪又害怕。

  • but I remember feeling frustrated, sad and afraid.

    雖然你只認識我大約十分鐘的時間,

  • Now you've known me for only about 10 minutes,

    但你大概感覺得出來, 這一點都不像我,

  • but you can probably tell that this was really not like me,

    所以當我清醒過來 並弄清楚發生了甚麼事時,

  • so when I came to my senses about what had happened,

    我非常地震驚。

  • I was in shock.

    除了「我需要幫助」以外, 沒有別的說法了,

  • There was no other way of saying it other than that I needed help,

    這意思既是我需要 某種心理治療的幫助,

  • both in the sense of I needed some type of therapy help,

    也意味著我需要有人來 幫我脫離那個處境。

  • but also help in getting out of that situation.

    那是我人生中的低潮之一,

  • It was one of the lowest moments of my life,

    而即使是在那種時刻,

  • and even in that moment,

    我的腦袋還是立刻飛快地 進入問題解決的模式,

  • my mind was running at hyperspeed into problem-solving mode.

    我該怎麼做?

  • What do I do with this?

    如果我不好好處理的話, 那我會讓別人對我更加失望。

  • If I don't fix this, then I'm even more of a disappointment.

    如果我沒有解決這問題的話, 那我更是一個失敗的人。

  • If I don't resolve this, then I'm even more of a failure.

    這些想法在我的腦袋中迅速閃過,

  • Those are things that were running through my mind,

    而我根本就沒想到 可以請求別人幫忙。

  • and it didn't even occur to me that I could ask for help.

    我周邊有那麼多人關心我 而且願意幫我的忙,

  • I was surrounded by so many people who cared for me and wanted to help,

    但我就是看不到他們。

  • but I just couldn't see them.

    直到最後,我的好朋友 必須抓住我的肩膀,

  • Until finally, my good friend had to literally hold me by my shoulders

    並要我開口求助。

  • and force me to ask for help.

    「妳辦得到嗎?」

  • "Can you do this?"

    「不行。」

  • "No."

    「妳需要幫忙嗎?」

  • "Do you need help?"

    「是。」

  • "Yes."

    「我可以幫妳嗎?」

  • "Can I help you?"

    「可以。」

  • "Yes."

    「我可以叫其他愛妳、 關心你的人也來幫妳嗎?」

  • "Can I get others that love and care for you to help you too?"

    「可以。」

  • "Yes."

    這是我大人版的「和老師對上視線」。

  • That was my grown-up version of locking eyes with my teacher.

    而就像那樣,

  • And just like that,

    當我一說完「可以,你可以幫我。」

  • as soon as I said, "Yes, you may help me,"

    我感覺到一絲希望

  • I felt a tingling of hope

    也拿回了一點對於生活的掌控。

  • and some sort of control coming back.

    而如果你想一想,這不是很奇怪嗎?

  • And if you think about it,

    當我們還是小孩時,

  • isn't it so weird we spend all of childhood

    我們如此地擅於尋求幫助,

  • being so good at asking for help

    但長大後,卻被期望 要成為一個能自力更生的人,

  • and are expected to grow up to be these self-reliant human beings

    而我們做得太好,

  • and we get so good at it

    反而需要有人提醒我們, 讓別人幫忙其實是沒關係的。

  • that we have to be reminded that it's OK to ask for help?

    之後,那剎那讓我明白好多東西。

  • Later, that moment helped me realize so many things.

    我總是熱愛且樂於幫助別人,

  • I'm always so happy to help others and I love it.

    那其他人怎麼會不願意幫我的忙呢?

  • Why wouldn't others be willing to help me?

    更重要的是,

  • And more importantly,

    我怎麼會不想讓別人也體會到

  • why wouldn't I want others to feel the happiness and joy

    幫助世界上的小山姆們 所得到的的快樂與喜悅呢?

  • that comes from helping the Sams of the world?

    在人生中,我們都想成為最棒的山姆:

  • We all want to be the best Sams in life:

    成為一個堅強、獨立且自力更生的人。

  • to be strong, independent and self-reliant,

    但是我們並不用一直都這樣子。

  • but we don't always have to be.

    所以,更頻繁地開口求助吧,

  • So let's start asking for help more often,

    因為幫助山姆是一份榮幸與禮物。

  • because helping Sams is a privilege and a gift.

    感謝聆聽。

  • Thank you.

Transcriber: Leslie Gauthier Reviewer: Krystian Aparta

譯者: Yunchi Hsu 審譯者: Amanda Zhu

字幕與單字

影片操作 你可以在這邊進行「影片」的調整,以及「字幕」的顯示

B1 中級 中文 山姆 求助 老師 小孩 幫忙 志工

What kids can teach adults about asking for help | YeYoon Kim

  • 0 0
    林宜悉 發佈於 2020 年 10 月 30 日
影片單字