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Welcome, everybody, to our support group for introverts in the age of COVID.
歡迎大家來到新冠肺炎疫情時代下內向人的互助會。
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Thank you for social distancing.
謝謝你們保持了社交距離。
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How are you guys doing?
你們過得如何呢?
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Hey, I'm doing okay, I think I'm just a little nervous.
嘿,我過得很好,但我覺得就是有點小緊張。
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Nervous, okay, about what exactly?
緊張,準確來說是關於什麼呢?
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I'm just not ready for things to be opening up already.
我就是還沒有完全準備好重新開放回正常生活。
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Okay, so you think it's unsafe?
好的,所以你覺得現在還是不安全嗎?
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I don't think so, I just don't wanna have to go back to needing a reason to cancel plans.
也不是啦,就是不太想回到那種,要躲別人的約還要想理由的日子。
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Oh my gosh, same!
我的天,加一!
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Last year my grandma died eight times.
去年光是我阿嬤就掛了 8 次。
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Wait, what?
等等,什麼?
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I know, it was a nightmare keeping things straight.
我知道,要誠實說出來真的有夠難。
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She had three car accidents, pneumonia, and Dengue fever.
她出車禍出了三次、得了肺炎還有登革熱。
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I'm shocked I didn't tell someone the same story twice.
我很驚訝我沒有跟同一個人說兩遍同樣的故事。
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Maybe I did, and they just assumed my grandpa remarried a lot.
或許我有啦,但他們可能就覺得我阿公一直再婚吧!
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Totally.
真的。
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At least now I can say stuff like: "Oh, it's a shame we can't go grab a beer, maybe when things are back to normal."
至少現在我可以說:「好可惜喔,我們不能一起去喝一杯,或許等一切回復正常我們再一起去。」之類的。
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They know I don't mean it, I know I don't mean it, but at least it looks like I made an effort.
他們知道我不是真心在這樣說的,我也知道我不是真心的,但至少看起來我有試著想要赴約。
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So, you don't actually want to see your friends again?
所以,你其實壓根不想看到你的朋友?
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No, I do, I just like the system we have now.
沒有,我想見到他們啊,我只是覺得現在的生活模式很棒。
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We meet outside a restaurant, we grab takeout, we go to a park and eat away from everybody else.
我們在餐廳外面見面,拿走外帶的食物,去一個公園,在沒有其他人的地方吃飯。
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No extra people, it's perfect.
沒有閒雜人等,超讚的。
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You know you can do that anyway, right?
你知道其實不管怎樣你都可以這樣做,對吧?
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That's literally just a picnic.
這根本就是野餐啊!
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Well, yeah, but right now I have a built-in eject button.
嗯對啦,但至少現在我有內建的彈射逃生機制。
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So if I'm not feeling up to it on the day of, I just say: "Oh, I've got a little cough, I've got a fever," and boom, two weeks of guilt-free me-time, baby.
所以如果我今天真的不是想赴約的心情,我可以就說:「喔,我有點在咳嗽,我發燒了。」然後蹦,無憂無慮地開啟兩週自我小宇宙時間。
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That is brilliant.
你是天才。
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What if you guys just turn down plans directly?
如果你們直接拒絕別人的邀約呢?
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I don't wanna do that, I'm not great with conflict.
我不想這樣做啊,我不太擅長處理衝突。
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It took me two-and-a-half years to tell my dad he was saying my girlfriend's name wrong.
我花了兩年半來告訴我爸他一直以來都叫錯我女朋友的名字。
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We almost broke up over it.
我們差點因為這樣分手。
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Plus, if you keep turning things down, you stop getting invited.
再加上如果你一直拒絕人,你就不會再被邀請了。
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Is that a problem?
這會是個問題?
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Uh, of course!
當然啊!
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Just because I don't wanna go doesn't mean I don't wanna be invited.
我不想去並不代表我不想被邀請啊。
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I want to know they're thinking of me from a distance.
我想要知道他們也是有想到我的,遠距離地。
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Exactly!
太中肯了吧!
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Man, it is great to know I'm not the only person who feels like that.
老兄,知道原來我不是唯一有這樣感受的人真的是太棒了。
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This is a great moment, I'm glad you guys have so much in common.
真是感人的一刻,我很慶幸你們有這麼多的共同點。
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You can work together to get more comfortable at making plans.
你們可以一起工作,讓制定計劃的時候更加輕鬆。
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Maybe after tonight's meeting.
或許在今天的會議之後。
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That sounds like a great idea, I'd love to, but tonight's not good for me.
這聽起來是個好主意,我真的很想參加,但今天晚上我不太方便。
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Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, me neither.
對對對,我也不太方便。
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In fact, I'm feeling kind of, like, a little bit of a tickle in my throat.
老實說,我有點…我喉嚨癢癢的。
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Probably nothing, but you can't be too careful.
應該沒事啦,只是小心為妙。
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Of course, next time though, for sure.
當然,下次吧,下次一定可以。
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It's just my grandma right now, she's a little bit under the weather.
就我阿嬤現在有點著涼了。
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Oh yeah, yeah, definitely, once things are back to normal.
真的,好啦,事情回復正常時一定約。
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We'll do it, and we'll grab a beer.
一定,我們再一起去喝一杯。
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Perfect.
太讚了。