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  • -You guys, my guest tonight is one of the all-time greats.

  • Sylvester Stallone is here!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Backstage I asked him, "Can I get you something to drink?

  • Water, soda?"

  • He was like, "Raw eggs." -Really?

  • -Yeah. Sylvester Stallone is here.

  • I knew he'd arrived in the building

  • when all 12 security guards downstairs

  • were sprawled out on the floor unconscious.

  • But it's great that he's here, 'cause I love having guests

  • on the show that have the same workout routine as me.

  • -Oh.

  • -Stallone stars in the new movie "Rambo: Last Blood."

  • Yeah. And this is strange.

  • He's also starring in the new "Downton Abbey" movie.

  • Isn't that wild? Yeah. That's right.

  • "Rambo: Last Blood" and the new "Downton Abbey" movie

  • are out the same night.

  • And if you plan on seeing both, who are you?

  • Um, let's get to some news.

  • Yesterday, President Trump was in California

  • visiting the border wall.

  • Construction workers said it was fun watching Trump

  • put on a hard hat over his hair hat.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Trump was there examining the wall,

  • and he said that it was virtually impenetrable.

  • Yep, virtually impenetrable,

  • or as it's also known, penetrable.

  • "The bridge is virtually safe.

  • You can walk across. It's kind of safe."

  • Actually one of the workers asked Trump to sign the wall.

  • Take a look at this.

  • -There's a tradition here on the border

  • that anyone who works on the wall signs the wall for us.

  • -Sign it? I'll sign it. Let's go.

  • [ Indistinct conversations ]

  • -And right where Trump signed it has become a tourist attraction.

  • Yeah, people from Mexico take a selfie in front of it

  • before crossing the border.

  • -Oh!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -♪ I'm walkin' ♪ -Keep on truckin'.

  • -Could we see what Trump wrote on the...?

  • "For a good time, call Mike."

  • -What? -Oh, that's not -- Come on.

  • That's not -- That's not -- -Come on. That's rude.

  • -That's not cool. -That's not cool at all.

  • -Then Trump talked about how the border wall

  • will stop people from entering the country.

  • Listen to this.

  • -Plus, it's designed to absorb heat, so it is extremely hot.

  • The wall is -- You won't be able to touch it.

  • You can -- You can fry an egg on that wall.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -"And that -- And that is why I'm excited to announce

  • the world's first border-wall/omelet station."

  • [ Laughter ]

  • The wall -- The wall is so hot, you can't touch it

  • unless you are signing it with a Sharpie apparently.

  • While showing off the wall, Trump asked the border agent

  • to talk about the technology they're using to stop people

  • from crossing the border, but it didn't go as planned.

  • Take a look at this.

  • -One thing we haven't mentioned is technology.

  • They're wired so that we will know

  • if somebody's trying to break through.

  • And you may want to discuss that a little bit, General.

  • -Sir, there could be some merit in not discussing that.

  • -Okay. I like that.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -"I know that.

  • I was just testing to see if you knew that.

  • Of course I -- Of course I knew that. Duh."

  • Meanwhile, back in Washington,

  • Trump is in the middle of a new scandal.

  • A whistleblower has accused him

  • of making a dangerous promise to a foreign leader.

  • Now, as of today, we don't know who that leader is.

  • It could be any foreign leader.

  • We can't jump to any conclusions.

  • We're just going to have to wait and see.

  • That's right. Trump's being accused of making

  • secret promises to an unidentified foreign leader.

  • It's been a rough week for Trump.

  • First, he wasn't named the next Bachelor and now this.

  • -Aww. -The First Lady is busy, too.

  • Today, Melania attended the ribbon-cutting ceremony

  • for the reopening of the Washington Monument.

  • But she had a bit of trouble with the scissors. Take a look.

  • [ Indistinct shouting ]

  • [ Laughter ]

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Yeah, yeah, yeah. Turns out she accidentally

  • grabbed Eric and Don Jr.'s safety scissors.

  • -Oh. -That's what they...

  • Some tech news. Amazon just announced

  • that you can now donate to 2020 candidates through Alexa.

  • But if you say, "Alexa, donate to Bill de Blasio," you hear...

  • -Alexa: Flush your money down the toilet.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -This isn't good. A new report found that JetBlue

  • and Spirit Airlines serve the dirtiest water on board.

  • JetBlue was appalled, while Spirit was like,

  • "We got mentioned in the same sentence as JetBlue?"

  • People on JetBlue knew something was wrong when a passenger said,

  • "I ordered water, not coffee."

  • And the flight attendant was like, "That is water."

-You guys, my guest tonight is one of the all-time greats.

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特朗普為加州邊境牆簽名 (Trump Autographs California Border Wall)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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