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  • As the main characters writing our own stories, we often feel like we're heroes combating everyday life events.

    身為自己故事的主人翁,我們常常覺得自己是英雄,迎戰生活中的事情。

  • But one wrong turn or move and you can end up as the villain.

    但只要一個錯誤,我們就會淪為故事中的反派。

  • Sometimes we can repeat hurtful behavior without meaning to.

    有時候我們會在無意間反覆做出傷人的行為。

  • It doesn't mean you're a bad person, just human.

    這不表示你是壞人;人非聖賢。

  • But self-awareness helps you get better.

    但是自我覺察可以幫助我們變得更好。

  • Feeling like the mean spider bit you?

    覺得自己好像口吐毒蛇嗎?

  • Here are seven surprising signs you're becoming toxic.

    以下是七個你變得「有毒」的跡象。

  • One: You can't seem to maintain relationships.

    一:你似乎無法保持關係。

  • Ever wonder why your relationships always end up in the dumps?

    你是否納悶過為什麼自己的感情總是跌入谷底嗎?

  • It might have to do with toxic partners, or it might have to do with you.

    原因可能在於有毒的伴侶,但也有可能是你。

  • Toxic relationships aren't always necessarily manipulative, controlling, and abusive.

    有毒的關係並不一定都是充滿操弄、控制或惡意。

  • Sometimes they stem from over-analysis.

    有時候,他們來自於過度分析。

  • Studies show that individuals with low self-esteem are more likely to expect rejection from their partner, and avoid telling their partner how they truly feel.

    研究顯示低自尊的人較傾向預期伴侶的排斥,並且迴避與伴侶分享他們真實的感覺。

  • In this case, self-fulfilling prophecies win.

    在這個情況,自我應驗預言就會成真。

  • The more afraid you are that the relationship will fail, the more likely it will.

    你越擔心一段關係會失敗,它就越有可能會發生。

  • Two: You can't fully trust your friends and you drain them out.

    二:你無法完全信任你的朋友且讓他們感到疲憊。

  • Do you feel like you have more enemies than friends, or worse, are your friends just enemies in disguise?

    你覺得你的敵人比朋友還多嗎?或更糟,你覺得你的敵人佯裝成你的朋友嗎?

  • Behavioral scientist Clarissa Silva says, we are supposed to be a better version of ourselves in our relationships, and support each other's goals, but when you're too busy making everything a competition...

    行為科學家 Clarissa Silva 說,我們在一段關係中,應該要變得更好,並支持彼此的目標,但當你忙著把一切視為競爭時...

  • No one wants to keep up with that attitude.

    沒人會想要面對這種態度。

  • Instead, Silva states, you'll begin to drain people out rather than energizing them.

    相反地,Silva 說,你會耗盡人們的精力,而不是激勵他們。

  • On top of that, with your obsession on surpassing them, you'll forget to provide the emotional support that your friends need.

    此外,當你著迷於超越他們,你會忘了提供他們所需的情感支持。

  • Three: You apologize once in a blue moon.

    三:你鮮少道歉。

  • Psychologists Abigail Brenner says that toxic people often claim the victim card, meaning that they seldom ever take accountability for their own actions.

    心理學家 Abigail Brenner 說,有毒的人通常扮演受害者。 也就是說,他們甚少為自己的行為擔起責任。

  • When you have a hard time swallowing your pride and apologizing, this can truly sabotage your relationships.

    當你因自大而不願道歉時,這很可能摧毀一段關係。

  • In fact, researchers discovered that there are many benefits to the art of apologizing, such as stress relief and rekindling friendships.

    事實上,研究人員表示,道歉有很多好處,像是釋放壓力和重修舊好。

  • When you don't say you're sorry, you miss out on understanding how you might have hurt someone.

    拒絕道歉時,你則錯過機會了解你可能帶來的傷害。

  • It isn't too late now to say sorry.

    道歉永遠不嫌遲。

  • Four: Drama follows you everywhere.

    四:你是話題製造機。

  • Do you have a habit of breaking promises or leaving others hanging?

    你是否有不遵守諾言或放人鴿子的習慣呢?

  • Consistency is important, but when it isn't, serious consequences follow.

    保持一致很重要;若沒做到,會有很嚴重的後果。

  • According to psychologist Perpetua Neo, bringing drama to the table, such as spreading rumors and starting fights, is a big red flag you're becoming toxic.

    根據心理學家 Perpetua Neo,製造戲劇化的場面,例如散播謠言或激發爭鬥,是你變得有毒的危險跡象。

  • Is telling a grandiose story really more important than your friend's feelings?

    說誇大其辭的故事真的比你朋友的感覺更重要嗎?

  • Five: You're addicted to social media.

    五:你成癮於社群網路。

  • This is different from tuning in to the Psych-2-Go channel to watch our new uploads.

    這和定時觀看 Psych2Go 頻道的影片不一樣。

  • Who doesn't appreciate many likes on Facebook and Instagram?

    誰不喜歡臉書或 IG 的「讚」呢?

  • But when your self-image becomes a bigger priority than staying present, that can lead to a bigger problem.

    但是當你的自我形象變得比保持參與來得重要時,這會導致更大的問題。

  • Dr. Sadie Letterelder says that letting technology get the best of you can make you accidentally be the toxic one in your relationship.

    Sadie Leder Elder 博士說,若科技蒙住了你的判斷力,你會在無意間成為關係中有毒的那一方。

  • When you rely on an audience for validation, you also rely on social media for ego boosts.

    當你依賴觀眾給予肯定,你也會依賴社群網路提升自尊。

  • This may cause others to resent you for having your eyes glued to your phone, rather than on them.

    這可能會導致其他人對你緊盯著手機而感到不悅。

  • Six: You talk about people behind their backs.

    六:你在背後說人閒話。

  • High school drama sucks, and if you constantly talk about people behind their backs, it'll feel like you never left, even when you graduated.

    高中時期的八卦最糟了。如果你隨時暗地裡說人閒話,感覺就好像就算你已經畢業,卻還是沒有長大。

  • You might think you're avoiding conflict when you complain on the down-low, but passive-aggressive behavior becomes a gateway to becoming toxic.

    你可能以為偷偷抱怨可以避免衝突,但被動侵略性行為會讓人變有毒。

  • When you can't openly share your opinions with others in a healthy fashion, it only hurts them in the long run.

    長期來看,無法以健康的方式分享你的意見,只會傷害到他人。

  • Even if you never meant to cause harm in the first place, people always have a way of finding out the truth.

    就算打從一開始你沒有傷人的意圖,真相總是會傳到當事人耳中。

  • Seven: You shut others out when their opinions differ from yours.

    七:你排斥意見不合的人。

  • Dr. Brenner says that being judgmental is a common characteristic toxic people possess.

    Brenner 博士說,愛批評是有毒的人常有的一個特質。

  • When you dominate the conversation and shut others out for having different thoughts, you end up marginalizing them.

    當你主導對話,並不讓想法不同的人發言,你也就排擠了其他人。

  • Not acknowledging another side of the argument doesn't make you right, it just makes you close-minded.

    不願承認反方意見並不表示你就是對的,這只讓你顯得很封閉。

  • Do you admit that you're becoming toxic, or knows someone who relates to these signs?

    你承認自己是有毒的人嗎?還是認識有人符合這些跡象呢?

  • Please share your thoughts in the comments down below.

    請在下方留言分享你的想法。

  • You can also join our community of Psych-2-Goers who help each other out in the comments.

    你可以加入 Psych2Go 的留言社群,互相協助彼此。

  • Pressing subscribe really helps us out a lot, thanks so much for watching.

    訂閱頻道來幫助我們。感謝觀看這支影片!

As the main characters writing our own stories, we often feel like we're heroes combating everyday life events.

身為自己故事的主人翁,我們常常覺得自己是英雄,迎戰生活中的事情。

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你好毒!?7 個你對他人有負面影響的徵兆 (7 Signs You're Becoming Toxic)

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    lauren.huang   發佈於 2020 年 09 月 19 日
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